Secret sleevers?

[Kjohnson*1 27]

I’ve been waiting all day to have my surgery, looks like now it’s gonna be 7pm. I’m so ready to get this show on the road! I’ll be looking to all of you for support and sharing my experiences as well.

[Orchids&Dragons 9,046]

26 minutes ago, Kjohnson*1 said:

I’ve been waiting all day to have my surgery, looks like now it’s gonna be 7pm. I’m so ready to get this show on the road! I’ll be looking to all of you for support and sharing my experiences as well.

Best wishes for a successful surgery and a speedy recovery!

[GreenTealael 24,864]

7 hours ago, diabladepaz said:

On social media, I see entire Instagram accounts dedicated to people's personal journeys of getting sleeved. I see so many that this *feels* like the norm. But I am curious to know...do any of you NOT tell a lot of people about your surgery? I am not ashamed to be getting sleeved, but for whatever reason I do feel very private about it. It feels like this deeply personal medical decision that I don't want to involve more people in than is necessary. I am not inclined to tell more people than I absolutely have to, at least until I have actually had the surgery. I am working through so many of my own fears and anxieties that I feel like I don't have emotional bandwidth to tell others about my surgery and deal with their questions, fears, and anxieties about it. I'd rather wait until it's done and then tell people as I feel comfortable. Would love to know your thoughts/experiences about how open you chose to be...

I only told 2 people, proxies. Medical info is private unless it affects someone else (STDs) but we live in a voyeuristic culture where illness is worn like a badge of honor and privacy no longer exists.

[RHCD 241]

Local close friends and very close coworkers I told leading up to the surgery. Then once it became noticeable my local friends checked if I was okay and that they could see a change I’d tell. Similar to at work.

Family found out when they see me not by social media or even a call. Although now that at 4 months my mom knows the whole family will know in a few days.

I’ve posted nothing on social media other than pics of me and plan to keep it that way.

[rs 1,473]

I am 4 weeks post surgery. Only my immediate family and 3 close friends know. I did not tell anyone at work. They knew I was going out for surgery and would be out two weeks but I never said what kind of surgery. Only person asked me what surgery. I just said I didn't feel comfortable talking about it but thanks for asking. Seemed to be received ok. I ended up having issues during my first week after surgery so I let my managers and some of my teammates know that I'd be out an extra week. I said the surgery went well but I was having issues with dehydration and malnutrition and had to be given extra IV fluids. I wanted to turn the attention to the recovery and away from the surgery. A couple of them texted me a few days later to see how I was doing and I said the upside to my recovery issues was that I lost some weight [emoji4], and that my Dr has me seeing a nutritionist. So from here on I'll play the nutritionist card, saying I'm eating more Protein, smaller portions etc.

[Foxbins 625]

Seven and a half years out and only my physicians know.

[RnYBeyhive 67]

I work in a pharmacy inside of a grocery store so my fellow pharmacy techs and my pharmacists know. I didn’t have to tell them but I felt comfortable enough to share with them. I cleaned up my friends list on FB so when I got a surgery date I made a post about my journey so far. I waited well over a year after I met my surgeon to tell most people about my journey (6 days till surgery). In the past I was very vocal about being a 300lb half marathoner. So far I’ve received nothing but support with my RnY journey.

[Hop_Scotch 1,626]

8 hours ago, Foxbins said:

Seven and a half years out and only my physicians know.

I am travelling interstate for my procedure, and if it wasn't for the fact that my surgeon insisted on having someone with me for 48hrs following the procedure, I wouldn't have told anyone. I asked a friend who has a band to come with me, knowing that out of all my friends and family she would be the one who wouldn't judge etc.

[Leia 75]

20 hours ago, diabladepaz said:

On social media, I see entire Instagram accounts dedicated to people's personal journeys of getting sleeved. I see so many that this *feels* like the norm. But I am curious to know...do any of you NOT tell a lot of people about your surgery? I am not ashamed to be getting sleeved, but for whatever reason I do feel very private about it. It feels like this deeply personal medical decision that I don't want to involve more people in than is necessary. I am not inclined to tell more people than I absolutely have to, at least until I have actually had the surgery. I am working through so many of my own fears and anxieties that I feel like I don't have emotional bandwidth to tell others about my surgery and deal with their questions, fears, and anxieties about it. I'd rather wait until it's done and then tell people as I feel comfortable. Would love to know your thoughts/experiences about how open you chose to be...

I felt/feel exactly the same way. I kept it from everyone but my bestie, mom, and Grandma until after Surgery. My sister and her boyfriend guessed. I'd not wanted to tell my sister because she would have tried to talk me out of it. As it is she thinks it was a mistake, luckily she doesn't lecture me about it or anything though.

Now a handful of friends are in the loop, but I'm still not sharing with everyone. I don't want to deal with the people who may think it's an easy way out (HAH!). I don't need their negatively, I still see enough of that in the media.

Ultimately this is your choice, and avoiding less educated opinions about it seems not only normal but probably safer. It's a stressful, emotional journey and choosing to tell only people you know will support you in a healthy, caring, sympathetic way is smart.

Edited September 11, 2018 by LeiaStone

[Lyndi84 21]

I didn't tell anyone that I was having surgery or even thinking about it. I live in Canada so our process is different. We can't just walk into a surgeons office and say I want such a d such surgery how much is it. All of our surgeries (unless cosmetic) are covered by our healthcare/government. So you need to be referred ect. Anyway, when I started the process I didn't tell anyone. I knew what i wanted and didn't want to deal with the drama and people thinking they could talk me out of doing it. So I asked my doctor to refer me to my local bariatric clinic. It took 18 months to get into the program. But was so worth the wait. Not only would they be doing the surgery but I had unlimited access to a psychologist, dietician, nurse, doctor, surgeon and other specialists. They taught me a lot, how to maintain weight, the healthy way of eating. What to expect before and after surgery...and so much more. It was 9 months after joining the clinic that I met with my surgeon and signed my consent forms for surgery. 2 months after that I started my epic long liquid diet. Just before I started my liquid diet is when I told close friends and family. As I would have to explain why I wasn't eating and only drinking shakes anyway. By then I think they thought it was to late to talk me out of it anyway as I had RNY bypass 4.5 months later. Now, however I tell people. If someone asks me how I've lost weight I tell them from portion and calorie control as well as having surgery to help me. Most are genuinely curious about the surgery. So I look at it as a chance to educate and squash so many of the misconceptions about having weight loss surgery.

Sent from my SM-G960W using BariatricPal mobile app

[Jazzie04 3]

I am keeping quiet about my surgery until ive had it. Only a few select people know. Just because I come from an obese family and I’m the only one who is doing some thing about my weight. I am 22 have 2 kids and a loving and supportive husband. And I am doing this because I want to be healthy for my kids. Looks are a bonus. My mom has always said something about my weight although she is heavy set as well. She knows about my weightloss journey and has the opportunity to do it as well as she has the same insurance as me (tricare) that covers the surgery, but I don’t think she’s really on board with it. Every time I talk about it you can kindve tell she’s jealous I don’t know why. But I just tend to stay quiet about it for that reason.

[Brassapple 56]

I’m right there with you. Just a handful know.

[Svdlux23 31]

I have told everyone for 2 reasons.. so they are aware I am going in for surgery.. as well as so they don't think something is wrong with me when I start drastically losing weight! I wouldn't want to have to have people think i have some illness and not feel comfortable about asking about it.

[Ginger-Snap 27]

I can completely identify with everyone on this thread. I have told a few select people, but do not feel the need to broadcast my life to everyone. I know that I will tell people when they ask how I am losing the weight, but I didn’t want a preconceived expectation placed on me before I lose the weight. Being overweight has always been a very hard topic for me to talk about. While I have great respect for those that document their journey, I am very private and can’t imagine documenting my journey to individuals on my social media that are more acquaintances than personal friends. I am very thankful to have joined this group and have really enjoyed learning about everyone’s experiences. These topics have been very helpful and reassuring.

[Psyched 91]

On 9/10/2018 at 12:01 PM, diabladepaz said:

On social media, I see entire Instagram accounts dedicated to people's personal journeys of getting sleeved. I see so many that this *feels* like the norm. But I am curious to know...do any of you NOT tell a lot of people about your surgery? I am not ashamed to be getting sleeved, but for whatever reason I do feel very private about it. It feels like this deeply personal medical decision that I don't want to involve more people in than is necessary. I am not inclined to tell more people than I absolutely have to, at least until I have actually had the surgery. I am working through so many of my own fears and anxieties that I feel like I don't have emotional bandwidth to tell others about my surgery and deal with their questions, fears, and anxieties about it. I'd rather wait until it's done and then tell people as I feel comfortable. Would love to know your thoughts/experiences about how open you chose to be...

I am an extremely private person.... extremely. My not broadcasting it has zero to do with shame and everything to do with, I just simply don't like people knowing my business. I also don't like the thought of having to navigate the inevitable "concerned" but not really concerned "friend" or family... I don't have the energy; but really it is just simply that I am protective of my journey. I am soooo excited that I made the decision and I just want to enjoy every part of it, minus the weight of having to introduce other people into MY journey. I immediately changed my eating habits, so that won't seem strange at all to people because I've been high protein/low carb and drinking Protein and eating tiny portions since July now. Of course my husband knows, my mom (I don't even know if she told my dad), and my best friend... that's it. That's whom I decided to share my journey with and I am at peace with it. I wish you the best!