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Laziness, guilt, and dread



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It is a gorgeous day outside here in North Carolina. I have been talking to my 5 year old daughter about riding her bike while I walk for the last 4 days.

I feel guilty knowing that she deserves a mom that is active, but I hate being active. I hate to exercise. I am in my pj's and the day is mostly over. I'm being sleeved 10/23/17 and haven't started any exercise.

My husband says he is supportive, but has no idea what is bout to happen. He has been to the surgical seminars, but I don't think he really knows. He is obese too. He thinks that since my friends, mother, and mother in law will be there, that he doesn't need to take off work on my surgery day.

I've been making bad decisions about food. I'm dreading the preop diet so much that I've been binge eating. I'm so worried that I'm not ready for this surgery. My excitement has been replaced with dread and stress.

I've never had surgery before, and I'm so worried about the pain, and throwing up, and the misery of going to social gatherings and not being able to eat.

I am in a nasty frame of mind.

Please advise.

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Sorry that you are feeling this way. You have already done the hardest part, making the decision to get surgery. After you have this surgery, you will have better quality of life. It is common for some people to start second guessing their decision but stay strong. Could it be your husband's decision is because of some fears since you have never had surgery? You seem to have a strong support system with your family.
To share my experience, I was sleeved July 28, 2017. I haven't thrown up even 1 day. I had pain up to 2 days post op that's all. With social gatherings, I am finishing my soft phase. I don't go out when I was on purée but now when I eat at social gatherings, I just what I can eat. I feel full afterwards and don't even crave for food . Your stomach will teach you. Hope all goes well for you.


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Thank you.

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my husband couldn't take off work either but my mom took me to the hospital. I can eat anything at social gatherings. I take a small scoop of this and that so that I don't feel like I'm at this picnic a n can't enjoy myself but I try to make good choices as well. I went through a phase pre op where I got worried and tried to eat a much of the stuff I thought I couldn't after surgery. But I also used to worry that if I didn't eat enough at lunch then I might get hungry later and not be able to eat at that time. As it got closer to surgery date I tried to really follow the diet and exercise some. Now after surgery, I try not to get too much good bc I know it'll go to waste. Just try to focus on why you made this decision and know that you'll be able to eat anything again but it'll be up to you make the choice to be healthier and after you lose some weight exercise will be easier and more comfortable.

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Hi Cedybug

I just had sleeve surgery on October 3. I told my husband to just come and visit me after the surgery. I got dropped off at the hospital by a friend. Personally.. I didn't feel like i wanted a lot of people around me. But a few hours of post surgery help were useful, especially for getting showered and dressed, and taking tiny walks. I was a bit short of breath and had a hard time talking to people.

The pre-op diet was not as bad as I thought, although it was certainly the toughest part so far (except for pain meds for me). I got the "keto-flu" on the second day and it lasted for another two days, with headaches and a bit of grumpiness and miserableness. Just like the flu. Honestly, after two days I didn't feel hungry at all, although I seemed to think about food a lot and dream about food. But the dramatic drop in carbs does amazing things to the body!

I haven't thrown up or felt nauseated once. I was bloated and did a big happy dance when I had my first post-op poo. Yay! I am not hungry at all and its an incredible feeling of freedom. I haven't had any social occasions to deal with yet, but I think I will just order some broth or skim milk. It will be enough. I know I will get some odd looks which is why I'm avoiding any socializing for as long as possible.

I'm not sure if my story helps you.. but the takeaway is that the pre-op nerves and diet were worse for me that immediate post-op, and they weren't even really that bad. I'm really excited about the changes to come. If you have come this far, and taken all the right counselling steps, you are probably ready.

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You will be able to eat, that is a wls myth.

I enjoy a wide variety of foods, I am also not happy because I was not prepared for the realization that this was just a 6 month head start. My healing went too well. I wanted it to be hard, I wanted to be able to go all day without being hungry, I wanted to be disgusted by the sight of food, I wanted to be 9 month out and still only able to get 2oz. down. None of that happened for me, my long term success is now 100% related to my relationship with food.

That is what we all need to focus on before, and during the honeymoon phase.

Good luck on your surgery!

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