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@@Kyn13 - And please ignore comments like Fredbear above. He does NOT speak for the majority of us. His comment deserves an "IGNORE"

"Waaaaaah, I had to listen to an opinion I didn't like, because I overshared and didn't have the balls to tell the person I wasn't interested in hearing it."

"When all is said and done, usually more has been said than done. "

So tell me something .... were you there with me today? No you weren't. Secondly did you not read what section this is posted in?? Rants??? This forum is here for a reason to come and to bitch and be able to get it off ur chest. I didn't care when I wrote this who read it or if no one commented a daum thing. This was about me being the better person and not being hateful to some dumb ass who thought they were trying to help.

But if you had been there today you would have heard me tell her that when she wanted to talk to me after class I told her she could talk all she wanted but it wasn't going to change anything for me. Or when she proceeded to corner me when I was getting my stuff and she kept running her mouth how I told her I wasn't interested. .. but I couldn't go any where cause I was half way dressed at the time. So I chose to be polite like I was raised and bite my tongue long enough to get dressed. And as I walked out the door I made sure she watched me throw every piece of paper she gave me away.

Don't like hearing people bitch moan and cry don't come to the rant page, have a great day.

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I'm with @@Fredbear , this is why I don't volunteer my personal life to strangers. I don't care about their opinions and I don't want to hear it.

Make your life easier and don't tell people your personal business. It is not lying or keeping secrets. All of the people I talk to on a daily basis and I consider friends know about my surgery. There is no reason for random people to know.

I know this is a personal choice and we debate it here almost every week, but consider it. Stress is bad for weight loss and other people will stress out and steal your joy, and they won't even care. That lady isn't still thinking about you, but you are thinking about her after the encounter. You really don't want to live the rest of your life like this or defending your life choices.

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Wow @@Fredbear not sure where this is coming from but you don't even state and opinion with which I can disagree. "Suck it up and put on your big girl panties" is in no way helpful or useful advice.

Sent from my HTC One M9 using the BariatricPal App

Actually it is really useful advice. This whole situation happened because she told a stranger something the stranger had no right to know. It is just like when people get angry on this forum because they make a public thread and people don't agree with them.

You can't control other people, you can only control yourself and your reactions. And just because you post in rants doesn't mean everyone is going to, or has to agree with you.

Not telling your business is an easy way to help prevent people from commenting on it. This is for your own sanity, not other people.

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I resent the vegan comment, you just did the same thing and lumped all vegans together just like those people lumped you together, so from a fat vegan. gee thanks

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I resent the vegan comment, you just did the same thing and lumped all vegans together just like those people lumped you together, so from a fat vegan. gee thanks

Sweetie it wasn't like that, what I was getting at is there is a group of them that swear if you come over to their side of life it will fix all your issues. And that's what I said " long time vegan who thinks it will work for everyone". I have no issue with anyone provided they aren't trying to shove their way of life down my throat when I didn't ask for it.

I resent the vegan comment, you just did the same thing and lumped all vegans together just like those people lumped you together, so from a fat vegan. gee thanks

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.... I have no issue with anyone provided they aren't trying to shove their way of life down my throat when I didn't ask for it......

You are still talking about vegans, aren't you?

:)

Edited by 4MRB4PHOTO

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No that could refer to anyone catholic, muslim, palleo diets, racist, which political parties ur voting for, how to raise my kid... it doesn't matter to me what u are if I wanted or had interest in finding out I'd ask questions

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For me. weight loss, WLS, and cancer have this in common; there will always be people who can't get past the label they have attached to you. They will always be watching for some sign that you are dying or gaining weight!

I had cancer 14 years ago and I still run into people who can't wait to grill me about my cancer status. Really? 14 years later and you are still fixated on that? Isn't there anything else you might want to ask me about? It got to a point where I just did not want to be labeled as the "Cancer Girl" and avoided those people at social gatherings. I still try to answer a question or two gracefully and then change the subject to something else. If they really annoy me, I make sure that I change the subject to something that they would prefer not to rehash (over and over), like any perceived failure on their part!

I'm just 2 wweks out from surgery but I expect that I will probably experience similar ongoing questions regarding WLS. For some people it will be the first words out of their mouths when we meet. I don't feel obligated to tell them how much I weight, lost/gained, current weight, or any other personal question that they would be mortified if someone asked them. I'm curious how some of you have handled those questions?

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Great Rant!!

I'm always amazed when commenters make snotty rude remarks on this site that is here solely to bring us together.

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People in their bubbles..... I always smile with a bit of evil when they keep talking.. Though some personal trainers aren't bad,some actually start out overweight or obese we just don't have enough of them to go around sadly.

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To those just starting out, THIS is exactly why I never told no one....that was 5-1/2 years ago.

Now, all the weight has been gone for years, the fact that I used to be fat-obese is old news, hardly anyone remembers.

Personally, so what if it is the easy way out??? People do things everyday as part of their daily lives to make life easier...most inventions in history were aimed at completing some task easier....

Accusing someone for doing something that will make their life easier, improve overall well-being and health, is totally illogical.

It's all about finding an easier way...and I can't be more glad I did it...

I'm glad I avoided it....

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Like @@B-52 said, I also told no one exclusively because I didn't feel like dealing with their judgement. Ok, wait, I lied there...I told my three best friends after I had the surgery because I can't keep my mouth shut, but to my knowledge they have never told anyone and they have never once made me feel like I took the easy way out or I did something wrong. I was 100% sure that first, everyone would be watching to see if I gained the weight back and then have all kinds of things to say about me and second that everyone would be watching to see how I eat and to judge that too. I may not have the thickest skin ever and I know that, so I made a point to tell no one.

Again, like B-52 said, the fact that I was fat is now old news. I am almost 3 years out and most people don't tend to see me as the reformed fat girl but just a normal size person. There are no more annoying comments about how much weight I've lost, no really how much in pounds have you lost, no more thoughts about what I eat or how often I exercise, and I just get to live like a normal person. I am very happy I chose to tell no one because now there are no resentful rude comments about how I cheated or I don't deserve to be thin because I cut out my stomach and that makes it a lot easier to feel comfortable as a "normal-sized" person.

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I completely understand and agree, I wasn't thinking when I said it I was excited over my last Dr app and getting closer to the final steps before surgery. Normally I tell no one out side my small circle. My mom, my son, my spouse and 3 of my best friends. Oh and I just told my boss Monday morning I was shocked to find she was so supportive, told me to take as much time as I needed and she was proud of me lol these groups tho are as close as I come to telling strangers usually unless my mouth slips :)

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I had a personal trainer tell me that if you can only do 10-lb weights (instead of the 30-40 lb weights she was using...), then it really isn't worth your time. Really?? Don't we all have to start somewhere? Needless to say, not working w/her any more --

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I had a personal trainer tell me that if you can only do 10-lb weights (instead of the 30-40 lb weights she was using...), then it really isn't worth your time. Really?? Don't we all have to start somewhere? Needless to say, not working w/her any more --

I have had some terrible experiences with personal trainers...some of them really just dont get it.

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