What’s Your Surgeon-Self-Other Split?

[Alex Brecher 10,484]

I know everyone’s different in the amount of involvement they have in their own health decisions. Some people take everything their doctor says without question, while others like to look into every aspect of the process, from deciding on the type of surgery to researching each Vitamin on the post-op diet.

Where do you fall on the spectrum of the surgeon-self split? And, who else has a lot of influence on your weight loss surgery choices and journey, whether it’s your nutritionist, your parents, or your significant other?

[Elode 8,093]

I listen to my surgeon but we have a different kind of relationship. He knows me pretty well and knows I'm more than likely going to research anything he says and make my own decisions. I trust him, he's pretty wonderful but I'm still going to check things out for myself. That's just the way I've always been. I knew WAY more about him than I probably should have. I had a list of questions with my little pen that I checked off while we talked. He said it's like an interview! Well?! You're going to be messing with my internal organs so.....I don't like "surprises", and I'm not afraid to ask questions. As far as others having an influence I'd say I'm pretty much on my own except for the people here. I'm the only person I know that's has had VSG. I learn from here, use my medical experience, and research. My husband has always been fit so he has no idea what it's like so he's just there to listen. I've found the people I thought would be the most supportive have somewhat become jealous so they are stand off-ish. I'm pretty much doing this on my own and truthfully I'm loving it that way. I've been way to dependent on others for too long. This is my growth period while I'm shrinking. I did this for myself so I don't need my hand held, just a "looking good" is good enough for me. I Like to hear it from strangers in my town like the people at Walmart and Walgreens. People who don't "have" to say anything but notice. That's way more fun! As far as my nutritionist she was nice but a complete joke. She taught me NOTHING! I had already done enough research that she didn't tell me anything. I only saw her for the 3 months because I HAD to. That was a waste of insurance money. I should add I also have a large amount of Drs, NPs ect.... that I'm friends with so If I have any issues I can't figure out they are always there to help out.

[Daisee68 2,493]

Hmmm.... good question. I don't know about others, but my contact with my actual surgeon is fairly limited. It isn't that she isn't accessible if needed. It just that I have only spoken to her at follow-ups or when I had a complication (stricture). I use the rest of the team much more. In the beginning, most certainly I followed what my surgeon said I was allowed to have but by week 6, she released me to eat what I could tolerate (of course still on plan). So it has certainly changed as time has gone on. My NUT is my most powerful influence on my actual food choices. (My therapist is #1 for HOW to eat and handling the emotional part of eating.) I would say that this board follows closely as a second as I see ideas from others (both what they had success with and what they did not). But I suppose above all, the actual putting of the food in my mouth is all me! not sure if that actually answered the question or not but the best I could figure out how to respond....

[thisfathasgot2go 235]

I tend to defer to my NUT, she was with me in the 4 months prior to the surgery and is now my contact after. I also will continue to take classes and go to support groups post-op to continue to be motivated. I am big on doing my own research too, so that is why I come here and other bariatric message boards for more knowledge and experiences.

I don't see my surgeon (or his office) again for a year. I am with Kaiser who is big on health education.

Edited October 18, 2015 by thisfathasgot2go

[Dub 9,922]

My surgeon is very strict and has been since day one.

Our program has two nutritionist. One seems more strict as well. I will try to direct all my future appointments to her.

The surgeon has been very open with his concerns and the future possibilities. I have faith in his abilities, insight and direction.

I am following his plan to the letter.

It was truly sad to me in our various group sessions with the surgeon, nutritionists and others that many of the patients do not wish to put for much effort to change. We are having freaking surgery to assist us with weight loss and we don't want to make changes ? It really shocked me.

What saddened me is that there didn't seem to be much "weeding out" as we progressed through our timelines leading up to surgery. Many had the same complaints and wanted to be told that doughnuts and pizza would be just fine.

Some of the folks, though, some....were outstanding. They showed tremendous motivation and were very inquisitive during the group sessions. They asked very well though out questions and I must say were a benefit to the group's progress. I hope to encounter them in the future to shake their hands and thank them.

I had the benefit of my own Q&A sessions with the surgeon, group sessions, reading the Big books and the session & videos from the psychiatrist. My family doctor helped me better understand what I needed to ask and be clear on.

Ultimately, it came down to trusting my surgeon. He has done his initial work inside my body and now I"m awaiting for his ongoing instruction.

I have faith that I will reach my goals.

I am grateful for the education I received leading up to this surgery and I really feel like the phycological evaluation process should have been longer and more thorough. I still feel like the mind is our greatest tool on weight loss and maintaining it.

[Daisee68 2,493]

@@Dub - well said. And I completely agree on all points. Sad for those that are always looking for loopholes and truly believe therapy should be a much bigger part of this whole thing for everyone for true success.

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

First, let me be clear that my surgeon is outstanding, and I trust him completely. Since my VSG he has become our "family surgeon" -- although who ever expects to need such a thing! Since VSG surgery 14 months ago he's also removed my gall bladder and operated on my husband for a dicey cancer-related biopsy. He is just an extraordinary surgeon. And he's got a great bedside manner, is available when emergencies happen, schedules surgery fast when needed, and really cares about his patients (per every nurse I've ever talked to who's dealt with him). Lucky me, eh?

Nonetheless -- all the decisions made about my type of WLS surgery were all made by me. With his approval, of course. I studied my ass off online for nearly a year before my WLS surgery. Like @@Elode I interviewed him re his complication rates, opinions about everything, and just ran him through the wringer. And he took it like a champ.

My husband, who's my #1 support person and gets highest marks for his support rolem had only one requisite: He did not want me to go to Mexico. Fortunately, that option did not become a necessary option, since my BMI (39.9) and three comorbidities qualified me for Medicare and Medicare supplemental insurance coverage for WLS.

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

I am independent and take complete responsibility for stuff... however at some point I had to acknowledge that "Jane's plan" is what got.me over 300#.

It took some swallowing pride and admitting how bad fhings were for me to accept the whole program from A to Z..but I did and it worked.

I picked one of the best practices in my area and committed 110% and found success.

[Ashlegal 525]

My NUT and my Surgeon don't have a "one size fits all" mentality in their plans for their patients. They work with us an individuals and not as patients of WLS. There are certain universal guidelines but each plan varies from patient to patient.

Because of that I follow my personal plan established by me, my surgeon, my NUT and my therapist to the T. I do not waiver in their expectations, requirements, plan details and goals for me. I know that the plan is put into place for me not only to succeed but to feel empowered by my decision, new way of life and a new me.

[BLERDgirl 6,417]

My surgery was very much into preventative care. I think he was a bit on the conservative side with some things, but I didn't mind because it made me feel like I was in good hands. He also has a team approach which I like. He handled strictly the medical part of it and entrusted the nutrition part to the NUT. I came prepared to have a conversation about my eating plan with my NUT. As a person with ongoing medical issues I have long learned that if you come prepared to have an actual discussion, most medical personal will respond in kind. If they do not, then that's not the program/doctor for you. At my first meeting with her, I explained my allergies and was able to demonstrate I had done my homework. Perhaps its in my mind, but I felt like the meeting started with her not expecting push back on my part, but as we spoke she came around. I was able to ask questions and she gave suggestions. When I came back for my next appointment and I had done my research and found a few options for Protein supplements and Vitamins, I think she saw that I was serious. Bottom line for me was I felt listened to, not talked at. I also always felt I could call or email with questions and get a timely response. I like my entire team because I always feel like an individual when I go there. I had to look up a lot of stuff to figure out how to make this work around my food allergies & vegetarianism, but I also felt it was applauded, not discouraged.

[LessOfMe0503 157]

I make all my decisions. I'm 100% responsible for every amount of food that goes into my mouth. I'm responsible for whether or not I exercise. I'm responsible for all of it.

Every decision I make is based in knowledge- 75% of that knowledge comes from the medical team, surgeon, nutritionist, psychiatrist, etc.