This never occurred to me until yesterday when I had the strangest thing happen to me...

I work in a very small office that only has 6 people in it. I told none of my co-workers that I was having VSG because quite frankly it was none of their business. When it comes to work life and private life, I keep them as far apart as possible.

I had taken Thursday office from work because I was feeling a little under the weather. When I returned to the office yesterday morning, I was approached by one of my co-workers. She asked me if I was ok. I told her I was fine. She then proceeded to tell me that she was becoming very concerned about me because I was losing so much weight, and she was wondering if I was seriously ill. That comment really caught me off guard. I thanked her for her concern, but assured her I was completely fine.

Ever since yesterday this has really been weighing on my mind. My surgery was done on December 12, 2014 and I have lost a total of 81 lbs. I see posts all the time about people who are worried that they aren't going to lose any weight, but has anyone had an issue with losing TOO MUCH weight?

The last thing that I want is to look too thin to the point of looking emaciated or anorexic. I am currently 39 lbs. away from what I thought was a good "goal weight", but if people are already thinking that I'm starting to look "sick", maybe I should reconsider what a "healthy" weight for me might be.

Has anyone else had these feelings, or actually experienced losing too much?

I had my lapband surgery in 2010. I started at 250lbs and lost about a hundred pounds over the next year. After that i somehow very quickly lost a lot more weight and was down to 120 lbs. ( i am 5'6). I was no longer getting complimentary comments, all i was getting was " you're too skinny" " we are worried about you" and from not so nice people "you look like a crackhead". I myself was happy and loving it, and my doctor saw no issue with it. But hearing from others definitly puts thoughts into your head, and as a people pleaser myself, at the urging of my family, i had the band loosened. BIG MISTAKE! I quickly over 7 months put 60 pounds. I was unhappy, unmotivated and depressed. I went to see my doctor and he said its ultimately my decision and as long as im getting the proper nutrition, it shouldnt be a problem. I had it tightened a few days ago and am once again on the journey! My point being, dont let what others say bother you! As long as you are happy and know you are healthy, big middle finger up to all the haters! Good luck to you!

People I work with know about my surgery and now that I'm down 75 lbs I'm getting them same type of comments. (Don't lose too much weight.......you should stay right where you are now, etc.)

I'm still considered "obese" by all the height/weight charts and I've still got fat on me so I'm pressing on. Not that I really have a choice, the weight just keeps coming off!

It's weird how people behave when they see a change in someone. It's got to be related to seeing a difference in a short period of time because no one is going around telling other long term thin people these things.

I'm going with Kcos626's advice and giving them the finger from here on out.

I believe there is no specific goal weight for a given height. If you research BMI, there is one calculation, but the "optimal" range depends on gender and age. Weight also varies depending on how much muscle you have on your frame. So, I would like to see you go with how YOU feel and your personal aesthetic.

I never understand why people feel the need to interject themselves into other people's business/lives when they have not been "invited" there. Most of the time I can get away with big smile and a "ain't it great!" and walk off, but then there are times where it is all I can do to hold my tongue. Because my tongue is a nasty one, when aroused in the wrong way. And then I can't take it back. And then I have to live with the consequences of my tongue. And then I have to STILL live with the morons with which I have just engaged. It always comes back to me. I guess I'll just smile and be happy with ME!

my thinking is you can't please everyone. I have been getting the looks and some comments myself the past few months and now its every wk from ones who are obese themselves..some has said "STOP" your getting to little! yet there's others who are not over weight are telling me to "keep it up" your looking great! ugh...there was a intersting comment I heard from a dr I can't remember where but it was recent and his comment was "some people in general has a distorted view on body image or size (weight or numbers) especially in the media bc of a certain group of skinny models..and so people are very judgemental now days on what each person "thinks is the JUST RIGHT size"....you need to decide for yourself and no one else where you want to be that is healthy. if ppl are used to seeing us as big, obese, overwheight or however the term is used when they see us shedding close to 100 pds plus it's going to shake them up or get them jealous or what have ya. I had some one asked me how far I was going down and I said "when my body see's fit to be balanced and happy it will stop on it's own and maintain"...2 of my gf's tell me you can't ever lose to much weight and laughed. it's hard on others to see us change but I decided I'll be the judge on what's enough for me and of course with the guidance of my surgeon which he has never set a certain amount to lose he has left that up to me. hope this helps ya..

Thanks for the words of encouragement. I know that I can't please everyone and honestly I'm not interested in even trying. It just really caught me off guard when she said that I looked "sick". I'm fairly certain that when my body is ready to stop losing, it will stop. At 4 months post op I'm still very early in the game, and the change shocked even me sometimes...

@@blondebomb

And to that a big AMEN!

Before I even began looking into the sleeve ( I had the band) I ran into an old co- worker and saw that he lost a lot of weight. I commented on how great he looked but then hesitated because I started to think ( OMG- what if he's sick) and asked him if everything was ok since he lost so much weight He then told me he had the sleeve so I had a million questions for him since I was considering it. Anyway, the point I'm trying to make is since they don't know about the surgery, they just want to make sure your weight loss was due to dieting, not an illness.

I don't have this problem. My weight loss has been so slow, I'm lucky if anyone even notices, lol. But when my husband had RNY almost 9 years ago, he lost weight rapidly and got down to a healthy weight for his height (maybe a little on the low end). He got those comments all the time, and when he mentioned that to his surgeon, his surgeon simply said:

"There are so many overweight and obese people these days, people don't even know what a healthy weight is supposed to look like anymore"

Made sense to me.

Her concern GreenEyes604 could have simply have been that she was concerned that you had an illness that caused you to lose weight so fast. I know as a nurse that someone losing weight super fast can mean a medical problem like cancer or something else serious. Now obviously you dont have any of that, and you are looking fabulous because of your hard work! The people that will be hardest to fool will be the people you see on a more frequent basis. Just be proud of your success and remember that this is for you and only for you!

I had my lapband surgery in 2010. I started at 250lbs and lost about a hundred pounds over the next year. After that i somehow very quickly lost a lot more weight and was down to 120 lbs. ( i am 5'6). I was no longer getting complimentary comments, all i was getting was " you're too skinny" " we are worried about you" and from not so nice people "you look like a crackhead". I myself was happy and loving it, and my doctor saw no issue with it. But hearing from others definitly puts thoughts into your head, and as a people pleaser myself, at the urging of my family, i had the band loosened. BIG MISTAKE! I quickly over 7 months put 60 pounds. I was unhappy, unmotivated and depressed. I went to see my doctor and he said its ultimately my decision and as long as im getting the proper nutrition, it shouldnt be a problem. I had it tightened a few days ago and am once again on the journey! My point being, dont let what others say bother you! As long as you are happy and know you are healthy, big middle finger up to all the haters! Good luck to you!

. That's right Middle fingers up to the haters!!! Do you!!!! People are haters & jealous. And it none of their damn business. They just pretend to be concerned so they can go talk about you behind your back........ You continue to strut your stuff.

Your body will adjust. You're more likely to have the issue of not losing 100% or regaining than losing too much.

I heard it over and over...my bmi still in the overweight range and people freaked about it. Now that I have been at a normal BMI over 2 years people think i look fine.

I have a girl at work who keeps commenting. The latest was that I'm withering away... She's 3-4" taller than me and about 60 lbs less than me... Pretty sure I'm fine. The comments are annoying though.

I have had people ask me if the weight loss was "on purpose" implying, are you terminally ill or something. So I think it can just be an adjustment for people who are used to seeing us very overweight to see us thin in a short amount of time. Especially confusing if they don't know about the surgery, which most of my co-workers don't either.

I will say that if you are emotionally healthy and don't have a history with eating disorders, that your body weight should find it's "happy place" or resting place eventually where everything kind of evens out. So while we have ideal numbers in mind, it may not be where our body wants to be. But I don't think - if you have resumed the "new normal" post-bariatric diet and arent' living on liquids and Protein shakes that you would ever be in danger of losing "too much weight."

I will say, though, that if you have a history of an eating disorder, this surgery can most certain trigger that. So in that respect, the surgery could be a contributing factor to an ugly old demon resurfacing. But if that's not something you ever struggled with, then I wouldn't worry about it. :-)