I am ashamed of myself..After sitting in the hospital for hours with an IV in me ready for my Gastric sleeve, I backed out of the surgery..Sitting there waiting for someone to remove part of me forever got me thinking that I did not really think this whole procedure through.. I realized Im simply not mentally ready for it. Perhaps if they rolled me right in and took me to the OR I would have done it, but sitting there for 4 hours left me way too much time to think stuff over..

Perhaps I will regret my decision perhaps I will revisit the surgery, but I want to explore a few more options as of right now. Yeah Im overweight, but Im healthy for now and just couldnt bring myself to pull the trigger..I have been crying all morning and afternoon and am ashamed of myself cause once again I quit myself. But it just didnt FEEL right...

I back out and canceled my 1st appointment for months. Totally normal, your body your decision.

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@@JerseyJules I read your original post at the time and though I felt sad for you, I understood why you did it.

I don't know if this is allowed, but I remember hoping you would find your way back.

Wishing you all the best, you have a great attitude and I'm sure you will be successful whichever procedure you choose.

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When I see pictures of my self sitting, It is where it is more obvious that I need this or something in my life..

Edited January 5, 20179 yr by JerseyJules

Don't beat yourself up too much. I backed out when I started to make my 1st dr. appointment. It took another month before I realized my life was only going to get worse if I didn't go through with WLS and I just made up my mind to do whatever I had to do to get through WLS.

When making a big decision like this, I ask myself:

1) Do I want to be in this same situation or worse a year from now?

2) Is the pain of staying in this situation worse than the pain of the change I need to make?

So far, answering those 2 questions have given me the clarity I needed to make any major decision.

You're right those two questions definitely means I should do my surgery because staying in this situation is at my worst nightmare and I am sooo tired of trying to look normal again.

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Just got back from my doctor appointment and I have to schedule all the pre-op appointments all over again. Going through the check list now and hopefully I can knock them all out by the end of January and be under the knife by mid February.

The funny thing is all of the staff remembered me and knew my story, they said to date Im the only patient that has backed out that far along into the process, literally last minute... The said they will hold me down if they have to this time.. Hahahahahah!!!

All I can say is thank you so much for your original post and the update. My surgery is very soon and everyone's perspectives posted here have been so helpful, particularly Jules. Wishing you best of luck.

All I can say is thank you so much for your original post and the update. My surgery is very soon and everyone's perspectives posted here have been so helpful, particularly Jules. Wishing you best of luck.

It took me some deep soul searching to realize I absolutely need this. Do i wish I did it 2 years ago? Yes and no... Yes cause I would be well on my new life journey by now. No because I just wasnt fully ready at the time mentally. I had to know for myself this was my only and last resort. I have tried to drop the weight at least 3 more times since that day and my body just will not let me.. Drastic results require drastic changes, and I now know Im not capable on my own of making those drastic changes.

The turning point was when I went to Great Adventure this fall with my kids and almost could not fit in one of the roller coasters. Another turning point was I was making love to my wife and happened to look at myself in the mirror and saw how big by belly actually is...Im finally at terms with what I NEED to do...When I asked my wife to give me an honest opinion of she would say Im just a big guy with some meat on my bones or if she would say Im a fat guy, she gave me the most honest and brutal answer I have ever heard... She supports me doing it so Im around for my kids in the years to come, and to make a change before I get sick. I want to be around for her, I want want to be healthy for her and my kids.

Im going to go through with it this time and simply gonna tell my doctor "hold my beer and watch this" and git r done!!!

Im tired of being the FAT GUY!!! f**k this ****!!! Im taking control of my life for once in 43 years!

Edited January 6, 20179 yr by JerseyJules

I wanted to bump this topic up to help all those that are considering doing WLS but have doubts and fears and cant come to terms. I just had my procedure done on February 27th 2017 over 2 years later from the start of this thread. Instead of going on a long winded rant, here is my long winded videos that explain my journey that lead my back to this point. If my story can help just one person make this difficult decision then I feel it was worth sharing!!!

Welcome to the club! Good luck on your journey

Well After backing out over 2 years ago, I sit here almost 6 months post op and am glad I did it..Best decision I have ever made in my life.

The before picture was about 1 year after backing out of surgery the first time after losing 30 lbs and gaining back 40...

You look Great!!!

Congrats on your success.

Looking great how do you feel?

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Wow, love the update.

1 hour ago, Mom3boys1971 said:

Looking great how do you feel?

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I feel like Im in my 20's all over again!!!!