Worst "compliment" you have gotten since surgery

[Buttercupbrown 70]

People saying...NOTHING!

[Miss Mac 6,261]

I typed SNARKY in the search bar, and hit the drop-down arrow and clicked on forums. It brought up several threads on comebacks.

My favorite is "Excuse me, but I see that you still have a little bit of BS on your lips."

[Miss Mac 6,261]

The two worst compliments I got were when I lost 70 pounds a few years back.

My mean ol' rotten ex-husband said "Every time you lose weight you get jowls'"

An aquaintance and her husband came over to the house. "We brought you some brownies. You look hungry all the time."

[Spicy06 175]

I am blown away by some of the things people are saying on here. Being called fat is rude. I don't care if you were fat, there are other ways to address that issue. I think that is you are worried about someone's health whether it's because of their weight or other issues then you set that person down privately and you have a conversation with them. As for having good honest friends, I want my friends to be honest with me. If I ask my friend "Does my butt look big in these pants?" I expect them to respond and tell me "No your ass is fat, it has nothing to do with the pants." If I don't ask you, keep your opinions to yourself. That is not honestly, your being a ****** bag. Oh and @ladylipstick may be nice by not singling people out, but I will call you an ass. If you are trying to drill into people's heads that they need to acknowledge they were fat and never forget it, you are not being helpful, or constructive, or supportive you are in fact being a giant ass. Trust me not one of us will ever forget that we were overweight. We do not need people standing by the side lines yelling "Don't forget you were fat once upon a time!!!" That just makes you a bully. So go back to your other boards I am cool with that. For anyone that posts on these forums- If you are not here to make this a helpful, safe, and supportive place, so find some where else to be.

Edited December 31, 2014 by Spicy06

[jacileggs 402]

Are you okay? Do you have cancer? Because obviously the only possible way I could lose weight would be to get cancer?

Edited December 31, 2014 by jacileggs

[LipstickLady 25,682]

I am blown away by some of the things people are saying on here. Being called fat is rude. I don't care if you were fat, there are other ways to address that issue. I think that is you are worried about someone's health whether it's because of their weight or other issues then you set that person down privately and you have a conversation with them. As for having good honest friends, I want my friends to be honest with me. If I ask my friend "Does my butt look big in these pants?" I expect them to respond and tell me "No your ass is fat, it has nothing to do with the pants." If I don't ask you, keep your opinions to yourself. That is not honestly, your being a ****** bag. Oh and @ladylipstick may be nice by not singling people out, but I will call you an ass. If you are trying to drill into people's heads that they need to acknowledge they were fat and never forget it, you are not being helpful, or constructive, or supportive you are in fact being a giant ass. Trust me not one of us will ever forget that we were overweight. We do not need people standing by the side lines yelling "Don't forget you were fat once upon a time!!!" That just makes you a bully. So go back to your other boards I am cool with that. For anyone that posts on these forums- If you are not here to make this a helpful, safe, and supportive place, so find some where else to be.

[wannaBthinsoon 1,634]

WHOA! This is really getting out of hand here. Can we stop now and start another topic? This is nutz.

[MissMac 163]

Nah......I will never get tired of this one, or anything sharing our NSVs.

I don't even mind it when brand new newbies ask the same questions that come up every week.

[jess9395 5,448]

People saying...NOTHING!

You know what... I think you win! The ONLY comment that has hurt me personally post op was one of my best friends for 30 years who I see relatively frequently--not frequently enough so she wouldn't notice, but not so rarely she wouldn't notice--said NOTHING even as I lost 75, 100, 125+ lbs. She finally did because we were in a group and others were commenting. That was the only one that hurt. I am thinking it was more about her than me (she was the skinny one who weighed less than 100lbs through HS and is now overweight) so I didn't hold onto the hurt, but it was there.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

You know what... I think you win! The ONLY comment that has hurt me personally post op was one of my best friends for 30 years who I see relatively frequently--not frequently enough so she wouldn't notice, but not so rarely she wouldn't notice--said NOTHING even as I lost 75, 100, 125+ lbs. She finally did because we were in a group and others were commenting. That was the only one that hurt. I am thinking it was more about her than me (she was the skinny one who weighed less than 100lbs through HS and is now overweight) so I didn't hold onto the hurt, but it was there.

Almost no one noticed my weight loss until about 75lbs down. :faint:

One of my best friends has no insurance coverage for this surgery but wants it/needs it. She didn't say anything until we were with a large group of people who were commenting and I was over 100lbs down. I was hurt, but at the same time, I totally "got it". It was sort of like having a beautiful set of twins when your bestie had been trying to get pregnant unsuccessfully for 15 years. I was more hurt for her than I was for me once I got over myself.

Edited January 1, 2015 by LipstickLady

[jess9395 5,448]

Almost no one noticed my weight loss until about 75lbs down. :faint:

One of my best friends has no insurance coverage for this surgery but wants it/needs it. She didn't say anything until we were with a large group of people who were commenting and I was over 100lbs down. I was hurt, but at the same time, I totally "got it". It was sort of like having a beautiful set of twins when your bestie had been trying to get pregnant unsuccessfully for 15 years. I was more hurt for her than I was for me once I got over myself.

Yup, it definitely takes a while to notice sometimes. And yes, I think comments (or lack of them) say more about the other person and their reality than it does about yours, which is why they usually don't bother me and if they do it isn't for long. Good analogy. I hope your friend is able to have her own successful journey one day whatever that may look like and mine as well!

[Shannon Piper 11]

It's so condescending calling someone fat. I always referred to myself as overweight. But I am ready for people when they say something rude. Think of a good comeback when someone says I didn't recognize you as fat, say I didn't recognize you as an ass. When someone asks me if I am worried about loose skin I will say I someone else's opinion of me is none of my business

[teacherlady2133 258]

I can handle comments.. Most of the time I see people not knowing what to say.. Out of their own lack of comfort they speak.....at times I struggle with what to say too so... That's life...

I do not think people should be nasty to each other. I would hope I have made good choices with the people that are around me, so I can wink off any crossing of the line comments.

[sarah-tiffany 10]

Most overweight people are well aware that they are gaining weight & how detrimental it could be to their heath. It's not, IMO, something one needs to bring to my attention. Being obese is hard enough on its own...I certainly don't need a friend, or otherwise, pointing it out. I don't see how that would benefit anyone involved.

[Big_Mama 511]

I just got sleeved Monday, so no weight loss yet. My best friend and I had discussed the surgery before-hand, as we both wanted to get sleeved. Her insurance requires 3 months with a dietician, mine didn't, so needles to say I got mine first. After I came home from the hospital, she called to bs about other things then finally said "oh didn't you have surgery? How are you feeling? " as I was telling her she interrupted and said, "yeah, I don't think I'm doing it, I can lose the weight on my own, I don't want to cheat my way to weightloss!" What a sucker punch to the gut! I only said to her you do what you please, and continued the conversation... smh