Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

What did you say?!



Recommended Posts

See, this is one of the reasons I am a little nostalgic about old fashioned standards of decorum. I may be showing my age, but personal comments (even those meant to be complimentary), directed at strangers or acquaintances, are rude.

I fudge on this a little, and I do compliment coworkers by saying their new hairstyle, outfit, etc., looks great. But I avoid saying anything that means "you look so much better without that horrid extra weight" and I wish others would do the same.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Speechless.................. I'll hold them down if you beat them up ! Just kidding, sorta................ I swear to God, what is wrong with people that they just bluntly speak their minds ? I know this is a weird question, but about how old were they ? Im mid 50's and I grew up with the rules about privacy, appropriate asking, USING a filter, tact and diplomacy, etc.... My youngest is 20, I DID teach her the rules, but you wouldn't BELIEVE some of the thing she and her friends say and share ! (Personal vent-fricken Facebook !!!!) Sorry, had to vent.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Speechless.................. I'll hold them down if you beat them up ! Just kidding, sorta................ I swear to God, what is wrong with people that they just bluntly speak their minds ? I know this is a weird question, but about how old were they ? Im mid 50's and I grew up with the rules about privacy, appropriate asking, USING a filter, tact and diplomacy, etc.... My youngest is 20, I DID teach her the rules, but you wouldn't BELIEVE some of the thing she and her friends say and share ! (Personal vent-fricken Facebook !!!!) Sorry, had to vent.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

PS. Congratulations on your 60 lb weight loss !!!!!! WOW ! Great job ! I guess I would try and focus on your amazing accomplishments instead of your co workers boneheaded comments. Just sayin '.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

If anyone goes beyond a nice simple, "wow, you look great". and starts in asking things like "how much has you lost?", or commenting on how fat I was before, etc, I will just smile sweetly and say "I am bored talking about my body, let's talk about yours now!" I figure that will stop things pretty fast. :-)

I'm totally filing that away for future reference... best.response.ever. LOL!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ready2B, you're awesome ! Great comeback ! You win !!!! ( Can you imagine if you talked back to them the same way they talked to you ? " Hey, your boobs are looking a little saggy there Sue ! Going to get a boob job soon ?, or Hi Bill, I see your stomach is starting to hang over your little private parts there !! Geesh ! No wonder the ladies are'nt interested in you !!.............. Oooooooops !!!! Did I say thaaaaaaaaatttttt ??? (Steve Urkel ,TV show)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

People are noticing the hard work you are putting in. Focus on that. I agree it was a very odd comment. A lot of times I think this happens because people are not really sure how to bring up a weight loss compliment without it coming across funny or awkward just like your situation. I would look at this interaction as a positive thing and not dwell on it too much. Know that your hard work through this journey is paying off and people are beginning to take notice. Use that as your fuel to keep working hard for bigger and better results.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That would be a little shocking to say the least. Even though we were over weight.....in general we take proud in the way we look and present ourselves. I hear constantly that they can tell in my face and chest that I have lost weight.....I just look at them and say " well I will be so glad when I turn around and you say you can tell in my "arse" that I have lost weight"..... LOL

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I had a man at work look me up and down and ask if my Staples were inside or out? I honestly was confused at first, he then said (in front of everyone standing around the Water fountain) I heard you had your stomach stapled! OMG I was so shocked I didn't even know what to say. People are so rude!

You are so much better than me, I would have asked him the same question, then when he said what do you mean, just say well I heard you had a penis implant as loud as I could..... conversation over!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My opinion is that it's ok to say something nice like "Wow you look great you've lost weight." But it's inappropriate to talk about someone's boobs unless it is a close friend. I work for a large company and this would make a great HR video that we have to watch every year about inappropriate workplace actions. Sorry though that it happened to you.

Great Job on the loss-

LA

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm about 6 week post op and finally feeling better - not as tired. I'm actually noticing some weight loss! Came back to work after the Thanksgiving Holiday and had the following coversation:

Co-worker: Wow! I haven't seen you in a while. You look great! You have really lost weight!

Me: Oh, Thanks! (feeling good)

Co-worker: I can really see it in your face. And in your boobs.

Me: (looking down, a bit unhappy now) Um, yeah, I guess the girls are the first to go huh.

Co-Worker: No, I mean your boobs aren't resting on your stomach any more.

Me: uhhhh

Another co-worker: Yeah, I noticed that too.

Me: uhhhh

What do you say to that?! It's like punching you in the face and your so stunned you can't react.

What is wrong with people?!

WTH?!!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm so sorry, I didn't MEAN to laugh at this, but if it helps it was an incredulous laugh!

Congratulations on your success (and you have a beautiful dog, btw)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm pretty certain that it is NEVER ok for a co-worker to comment on your breasts in any way, shape or form. That's a very no-no conversation in the workplace. Well, in a corporate workplace anyway.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

d1fedb418ad38417dd6e68de95acbba6199155d7

like Water on a duck's back.... keep it up.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • BeanitoDiego

      I changed my profile image to a molecule of protein. Why? Because I am certain that it saved my life.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • eclarke

      Two years out. Lost 120 , regained 5 lbs. Recently has a bout of Norovirus, lost 7 pounds in two days. Now my stomach feels like it did right after my surgery. Sore, sensitive to even water.  Anyone out there have a similar experience?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Eve411

      April Surgery
      Am I the only struggling to get weight down. I started with weight of 297 and now im 280 but seem to not lose more weight. My nutrtionist told me not to worry about the pounds because I might still be losing inches. However, I do not really see much of a difference is this happen to any of you, if so any tips?
      Thanks
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Well recovering from gallbladder removal was a lot like recovering from the modified duodenal switch surgery, twice in 4 months yay 🥳😭. I'm having to battle cravings for everything i shouldn't have, on top of trying to figure out what happens after i eat something. Sigh, let me fast forward a couple of months when everyday isn't a constant battle and i can function like a normal person again! 😞
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×