How has your husband/wife/SO fared during your WLS journey?

[MrsSugarbabe 727]

I'm happy to hear that your husband finally came around to support you on your WLS decision The responses to my question have been so much more encouraging than what I think I was expecting initially for which I'm thankful. Keep up all the great work you've been doing!! You and your hubby on are your way to enjoying all those things you enjoy doing together!!

I wanted to add that my husband has not always been so supportive. In the past when I have worked very hard to lose weight through numerous methods, I got a lot of teasing (some downright insults), sabotaging, complaining about the lighter foods I prepared, etc. So this is a huge change and I think part of the reason is because he was finally seeing how horribly my weight was affecting me. It was also affecting him since I was no longer able to do the things with him that he wanted to do. I couldn't travel with him, couldn't go places that would require much walking or any other things that we used to enjoy together. He said he even began to fear that I would end up in a wheelchair soon! When I told my husband that I wanted to do this, instead of rolling his eyes, he had such a look of relief on his face that it made me cry!

The responses I've read so far to this question have been overwhelmingly positive - quite a contrast to the answers I saw to the same sort of question to the WeightWatchers forum. I think here, we've all reached such a point where our weight loss is really critical for our health and quality of life.

[MrsSugarbabe 727]

What wonderful success you and your wife have had, Bob2013!!! Congratulations to you both!! Thanks for sharing the photos Very encouraging!

My wife is following the same diet as me except she is doing a bit higher calorie count. she has lost 60lbs since my surgery.

The pics below are a few months back but show the transformation for the both of us.

bob.jpg

lisa.jpg

[MrsSugarbabe 727]

Bandista, my hubby expressed a similar concern about what might happen after I lost a lot of weight, and I assured him I with him till death do us part (his first wife lost weight and left when other men tempted her). We've been married 10 1/2 yrs. (my 1st and only; his second). We're two peas in a pod. That's a great idea about the party arrangement! Love the "delicate eater" description. I'll have to borrow that phrase in the future. Thank you for sharing!

Great thread! My husband needed some reassurance when I started dropping weight that I am his forever person. He knew it was silly but that fear that I'd be soaring and might just soar away.....no, he's coming with me. We're very tight, 24 years, solid marriage, but still that seemed to appear from deep within. As far as food, I am a crazy cook -- still love food prep and that hasn't changed. My eating has certainly changed. At parties sometimes my husband I quickly swap plates. He has finished and I have had my tiny portion and don't want to attract attention. And for restaurants I am a cheap date -- I order something I know my husband and/or son will enjoy because I'm just going to have a bit if it. You know, being such a delicate eater and all, lol. OMG, I love this life!

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

My husband and I are a strong team already. And I'm VERY "young" in this process (was only sleeved five days ago). But the day after surgery, hubby said he thought he would try using one of my shakes for Breakfast for a while. Then he said he'd like to lose 15 pounds, which is only a little bit, but it would make him feel better physically and mentally.

So I'm tickled for him and the idea that 15 fewer pounds for him will make his back feel much better.

Needless to say, he is super-supportive of me. The evening we came home from hospital, he called me "Skinny." LOL! Now, THAT is a supportive spouse!

[MrsSugarbabe 727]

Ya'll have had a couple of major lifestyle changes in the past few years. It's wonderful you are both being supportive of the other and successful together!

My hubby has been 100 % supportive all the way. We had changed our eating habits when he was diagnosed a diabetic 4 yrs ago, so I didnt have to change alot of food when I was banded. My problem was quantity., snacking and a big sweet tooth. But since ive been banded he has lost 8 lbs because we make smaller amounts of food. He's very happy ( he's 6'1, now weighs 204lbs) with both of our weights losses !!

[BladeFox 235]

My guy is my rock and my support. He couldn't get around taking me out to dinner and I was struggling with it as well for a few weeks, but I have reinforced to him that he can take me anywhere and I will do the selecting of food. Even if that means that I order a regular meal and have to get a carry out for later. I sometimes complain about not eating the way that others do and not having the urge to cook anymore, but he lives with my complaints. He doesn't like the fact that I hate cooking, but is adjusting to quick 30 minute dishes when and if I cook these days. Long gone are the days of cooking big meals throughout the week. The entire family has adjusted for my success. Love them!

[1Day1Life4Now 882]

My hubby eats everything I don't finish on my plate so sadly....he has gained weight. I'm trying to get him to eat like I do but so far he's not sold. I'm still working on him but he is so pleased with my progress.

[newlifejen 32]

During my 2 week pre surgery diet, my fiance drank shakes with me and did indeed lose weight. Today I am 5 weeks post op and have fared very badly. He has been by my side and cared for me every step of the way.

I could not have asked for a better man to be my future husband.

I just read your posting. It looks like you have lost a substantial amount of weight since July 14th, but you say in this posting that you "have fared very badly." Just curious as to how you are doing?

[marfar7 1,528]

My husband is very encouragine during this whole year that I've been sleeved. He's gained weight - probly from eating all my leftovers that I hand to him. He told me last month "quit offering me ur extra food. I'm getting fat!"

He uses Atkins to get back on board. I don't. I just eat smaller portions. I don't diet.

[Bandista 7,466]

@@CarmenLeAn you are doing so well! 115 pounds in nine months -- get out if the way! We are both November bandits -- I am so, so happy.

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

Over 2 1/2 years out from Lap-Band surgery and my wife has dropped 19 lbs to 134 on 5' 3" frame. Both of us are enjoying a much better healthy eating lifestyle.

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Hi Mrs.Fun!

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

I will say that when a spouse doesn't support us, it is about their issues and goes deeper than WLS. My husband never supported me in any weight loss endeavors. OA , diets, weight watchers, WLS. Silence or open ridicule or snide comments. I don't want to bring the thread down but some reading this here may see themselves in my reply. I've left him. Not because of this issue, but because of huge problems in our 23 year marriage and relationships with our children as well.

That said, I have a rock solid supporter in my younger daughter. She takes no prisoners. She suffers no fools. And she wants me to live my best life as healthily as I can. She can be kind of a nag but she also watches her weight and will go walking with me at the drop of a hat. I miss her when she is away at college. I want to make her proud of her old mama and forgive me for the years I spent drugged out on food in front of the tv.

I'm happy for the healthy marriages in this post. I know they are real. Mine was not one of them, but we move on.

[Fluffnomore 1,235]

Or, in the case of my husband…he wanted the surgery and was denied. He has been on a bit of a pity party/spree this year and we are both afraid he has gone from pre-diabetic to diabetic. Thankfully I think he is pulling out of his tailspin; we've made some appointments and are going to try to tackle this again. I know he is proud of me, but he feels sorry for himself.

That said I believe that our marriage continues to grow and develop; I'm not worried about that part of it.

[SandyM 1,956]

Hubby has lost over 42 lbs since my WLS. He's smaller than I've ever seen him, weighing 160. I'm so proud of him. We use to sabotage each other, sometimes deliberately, but usually not. But now, both being at our goals, we keep each other propped up. Hubby likes to say we got a two-for-1 surgery.

[NavyMom6 28]

A few years ago when I threw the idea of weight loss surgery around, my husband wasn't on board at all. So I kind of stopped talking about it.. He is terrified that something would happen to me in surgery.. After all removing part of your stomach is a huge step and very big surgery..

Then this past year I told him I was going to check with insurance and attend a seminar.. So I did, after the seminar I was sold!.. I started

doing all the requirements insurance wanted me to do, after all they were paying 90%.. I told my husband I was having it done with or without him..

He seen how serious I was and started reading about it himself.. My primary Dr. wanted me to start walking 30 minutes a day before surgery and when my husband seen me taking it very serious.. I am happy to say he climbed on board.. He started walking with me.. Talking to me about it..

He actually lost 20 pounds just walking and cutting out a lot of junk and pop we were used to having.. He isn't really over weight but says he feels better just losing 20 pounds.. So on July 9th I had my surgery and to this date I have lost 42 pounds.. He even stayed overnight at the hospital with me.. He is still very supportive and proud of me.. He calls me slim shady.. haha.. That's my little story.. I wish you the best of luck on your journey!

Edited August 24, 2014 by NavyMom6