Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Telling people Im having weight loss surgery.



Recommended Posts

My surgery is march 20th. I'm kind of an open book and I have told people that I'm having the sleeve. As I expected some were excited for me, some were polite, and some close concerned friends tried to talk me out of it. Like I said I expected all of this. But some people have been downright rude. Today I went to get baseline bloodwork done. The staff at my lab know me due to my other illnesses. So the lab technician was commenting that this is not the usual test that I get. So I told her it's because I'm having weight loss surgery. She actually said "oh no!" Than told me a horror story of someone she knows who had it done, who is very sick now. I was polite and said oh that's ashame. Then she asked me if I have tried diet and excercise. Ummm no, never even crossed my mind! I remained polite and stated that I crossfit three times a week.

It just really annoys me that people make assumptions about me because of my weight. I'm sure you all have similar stories.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My date is March 20th also (assuming my insurance approval comes through - it was submitted yesterday). I struggle with the same thing. I don't want to lie about having it and am not ashamed to tell people that I had weightloss surgery but I have no idea how to handle the comments I get. I even had one person tell me, they had a friend of a friend of a friend who had ta sleeve and grew a second stomach. What can you say to that except that they need to do some research before they say ignorant things. I'm just left shaking my head….

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ugh ignorance is annoying.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I started the program last year and quit. I just started up again and have decided not to tell anyone about it until after I have the surgery. Only two people know, my husband and a girl I met at the weight loss seminar. I came to this decision because my mother in law was constantly nagging me about that dangerous stomach surgery and my Bff is always trying to convince me to save my money because I can lose 184 pounds in no time by going to the gym. She doesn't realize I just had my sixth back surgery and I really can't do any exercise besides walking. She only needs to lose like 30 pounds. Trying to explain to her that when you are morbidly obese weight loss on your own is not the easiest of tasks.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wish I was as open as you, I've been super picky about who I tell and some people (my mother) don't understand why. Its because people are mean and most don't understand unless they have been in your shoes.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have had some people say positive and some negative from friends and family. I tell the negative ones... Thank you for your comments and concerns, but I'm not doing this for you.. I am doing this for me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am also telling a few PPL. I feel that everyone thinks it's easy to go to the Gym and work it off but it's not. Everyone does what they feel is right and if our choice is this then so be it. We'll meet y'all in the gym.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My family was all for wls in the beginning, but once they realized I got realllly serious about it, they went into panic mode. As a matter of fact, they told encourage me to look into it. Since a family friend had great success with it. But now the family friend is obsessed with losing more weight. And my family said she looks sickly and unhealthy

Plus she looks like she aged 10-15yrs..I know it's coming from a place of love and concerned. I have already made up my mind. Praying to God he protect me during surgery and post-op, and for a speedy recovery. My mom even said she's willing to pay for a personal trainer for me..and I'm not big enough for surgery. (240lbs)..smh..they know all to well how my self esteem is soooooo low cause of my weight..my mom even told me a coworker in her job had wls & her husband left her cause she got so sickly and unhealthy looking. She said she's afraid my husband will feel the same if I look sickly. That really hurts!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm having surgery March 20, too! I'm not telling ANYONE except my mom. I'm in law enforcement and work in an office full of dudes that gossip like old ladies! Luckily I currently live far away from my family and friends so I'm just going to sneak off this island for 10 days. I've already started cleaning up my diet so once the weight starts coming off I'll attribute it to clean eating and exercise- which will be true! ;)

I only see my family and friends once a year at most so next time I go home it'll be a shock.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Tomorrow is my surgery and as recent as yesterday my boss asked me if I was really sure this surgery is what I wanted to do. UGH!!! I think he has good intentions but just shut up please.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm scheduled for the 21st. I have only told my parents, husband, and kids. They all support my decision. I don't want the judgement from people who really don't know me and don't walk in my shoes. This is not an easy decision to make. I believe a majority of us are not doing this for vanity, it's about are health.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Almost everyone in my close circle has been supportive of the surgery. One friend had legitimate concerns and she expressed them politely. It's the people outside of my circle who have been a problem.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A lot of people are idiots and have no clue about WLS. It never even occurred to me to tell anyone outside of DH and my grown kids. Doubt I ever will. That's just me. My medical history is private. I have no patience for morons who say stupid things like "have you ever tried diet and exercise." Sheesh.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Those of you who are not telling people, what do you plan to say when you get asked a million times about how you did it?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I find it hard to hide because I work in surgery where I'm gonna to have my procedure done. I was reluctant to tell people. But the people that know have been very nice and supportive. I'm grateful. In the end it's only what matters to you and how you feel. Stay strong and tell whomever you want. It's def all your choice. Just don't let anyone make you feel like you're making the wrong decision, it's yours and only you know if it's right for you. :-) best of luck.

Edited by SliminDownThick

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×