Pretty sure I f***ed up the sleeve. No leak, but I might as well have never gotten it.

[bonniefide 49]

I have to agree with what most people are saying, which is that you should stop blaming outside circumstances that could be changed and instead look inward, being very blunt and realistic with yourself.

Alcohol should not be consumed by people who have had a sleeve for ideally 6 months to one year after surgery. There is a special digestive enzyme in your stomach that processes alcohol. Since 85% of your stomach has been removed, there is very little of that enzyme (if any) to process alcohol. You could actually end up with alcohol poisoning and be in the hospital getting your stomach pumped.

If cereal is a "trigger" food (a food that you can't seem to stop eating once you start) then don't buy it. There are a ton of things that I just can't buy because I know I can't control myself and I will eat all of it! Grocery stores sell pre-cooked chickens, usually for $5. If you want something quick and easy, you could get a chicken and eat off of that for a few days. Also, Protein shakes with milk will give you Protein and what your body needs to feel full. I tried Isopure Water for the first time today. It smells kinda weird but tastes OK... and dang, it filled me up. I'm actually burping! (TMI)

Support groups work when you work the program. Do you think it would be acceptable for an alcoholic to attend an AA meeting if they just kept drinking and drinking, week after week, year after year? Just going will not help someone until they actually hit rock bottom and make the decision to stop. The point is, it is horribly difficult... horribly horribly difficult to stop eating... (I am literally fighting it every minute of the day) but it is something you have to fight just like any other addict.

Your stomach is not likely stretched all the way out, but you could be doing damage to your insides. Your hair is falling out because you are not consuming nutrients. The majority of people who get a VGS will have hair fall out - this is because your body is working to keep the more important parts of your body working (like internal organs and muscles) and ignores things like hair, nails, and skin.

I've noticed in a lot of your posts you mention things you can't do, such as not being able to cook. I can't cook either, and that was a big fear of mine. So, what am I going to do? I'm going to sign up for cooking classes. In the meantime, I look up stuff on youtube that looks basic enough for someone who can burn water! My nutritionist gave me smoothie recipes that use frozen fruit and yogurt. The frozen fruit doesn't go bad for ages (cuz it's frozen) and the yogurt isn't anything fancy. Then I just add Protein powder and put it in a blender. It literally takes 5 minutes and you can't screw it up.

To conclude, it's easy for anyone to tell you what to do; however, you sound very depressed on top of everything else, so anything people tell you to do will seem unrealistic. I have been through therapy myself and was on antidepressants from the time I was 15 up until last year when I finally got good therapy (I'm 33 now). So, I do understand depression... everyone is just like, "Well... don't be sad. Think positive." Gee.... why didn't I think of that? I'm cured! haha. The point I'm trying to make is, PLEASE reach out for help... either to your primary doctor to work with you on getting the correct type of medication for you, or to a licensed therapist that can help you through this. If you can work through some of these issues in a non-judgmental environment, you will feel more positive about your outlook in life, then things kind of click into place slowly but surely.

[Someguy1383837857 18]

I didn't read the rest of the thread and just read the initial post but it sounds like you may need direct counseling rather than a support group. You may be addicted to food and alcohol.

[Butterthebean 8,146]

I didn't read the rest of the thread and just read the initial post but it sounds like you may need direct counseling rather than a support group. You may be addicted to food and alcohol.

I didn't read your whole post but I'm pretty sure you shouldn't have posted anything if you weren't going to read all the information previously posted.

[Someguy1383837857 18]

I didn't read your whole post but I'm pretty sure you shouldn't have posted anything if you weren't going to read all the information previously posted.

Why would you say that? I read his post and his post has all the relevant information to his situation, nothing anyone else posted mattered.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

I didn't read your whole post but I'm pretty sure you shouldn't have posted anything if you weren't going to read all the information previously posted.

I didn't read your whole post, but I'm pretty sure you're dead on the head.

[No game 14,436]

Why would you say that? I read his post and his post has all the relevant information to his situation' date=' nothing anyone else posted mattered.[/quote']

Didn't matter??? Wtf? Some of my best work is in there buddy!

Didn't matter...

Edited November 1, 2013 by laura-ven

[Butterthebean 8,146]

I didn't read your whole post' date=' but I'm pretty sure you're dead on the head.[/quote']

Yeah my hair is a little thin on top, what of it?

[Butterthebean 8,146]

Why would you say that? I read his post and his post has all the relevant information to his situation' date=' nothing anyone else posted mattered.[/quote']

I'm pretty sure your post doesn't matter either.

[PdxMan 4,292]

Why would you say that? I read his post and his post has all the relevant information to his situation, nothing anyone else posted mattered.

Oy! This thread has trended in a direction I or Laura would be blamed for. Nice job Butter! Lol!

Anyhow, you need to read the entire thread because there has been a dialog with the OP for which they have been responding to other people's posts and giving us more information. Information YOU need to make an informative response instead of, well ...

I mean, come on ... the thread is over 3 pages ... don't you think there may be more to the story than just the first post?

[Butterthebean 8,146]

Oy! This thread has trended in a direction I or Laura would be blamed for. Nice job Butter! Lol! Anyhow' date=' you need to read the entire thread because there has been a dialog with the OP for which they have been responding to other people's posts and giving us more information. Information YOU need to make an informative response instead of, well ... I mean, come on ... the thread is over 3 pages ... don't you think there may be more to the story than just the first post?[/quote']

Thank you. I wanted to say all that but I was too busy rolling my f**king eyes.

[AmandaRaeLeo 2,145]

Wow, OP. It sounds like you're battling some serious demons. food addiction. Possible replacement addiction.

It also sounds like you are your own worst enemy right now. I can relate. Angry. Bitter. Insecure. Confused.

Maybe you can find a local OA support group or a place that focuses on eating disorders or addiction? You have to choose to take the first step, tho.

I hope you know we are standing right beside you.

[Macy6 356]

And then she will want to talk to my mom about it' date=' or have me talk to my doctors which Im not comfortable about it!!! [/quote']

Sorry if I'm repeating what someone else has said but this is an excuse and a poor one at that. #1 there is no counselor/therapist in this world that is going to count binge eating as an act of self harm to the point it is reportable #2 patient counselor confidentiality she can't tell your mom squat unless you have made a direct threat to harm her (mom) or yourself. The point of counseling is to talk about this stuff. I have had many successful counseling points in my life and they didn't happen by me sitting back and saying all is great. That counselor is there to help you identify skills to improve your life. You will not heal until u have identified what is causing the breakdown in the first place AND dealt with it. Now put on your big big pants, admit you have a problem and work on it. You only have 1 life, live it.

[Beach Lover 1,084]

Okay, I did read the whole post. I have to say that I am proud that you are reaching out because a part of you knows that you are making some seriously bad decisions. You apparently have some issues in your personal life that need to be addressed with a therapist and I wish you the best of success with that. You have been given some very good advice on here and everything is up to you. There are some things you can do to make your new life a success irregardless of where you live or how well you can cook. If you are in a college setting I am sure there are plenty of people around you that can help you with the cooking tips. If not, we are here for you. Just ask there is enough good cooks and supportive people on here that will walk you through your cooking. You have heard this enough times but I am going to say it again. Stay away from the sliders! They are mentally anguishing you and probably stalling your weight loss. On top of that they make you crave them more to the point of driving a sleever crazy.........me included!! I am going to give you some easy quick foods that can be purchased to fill you up and I am inviting everyone else to add to that list.

Beef Jerky

cheese Stick

Hard boiled eggs (You can buy these preboiled at the grocery store)

Summer sausage

tuna

chicken salad

almonds

Premier Protein shakes

SF Jello (not in the shot form )

rotisserie chicken,

fish from the deli

Subway chopped salad

greek yogurt

fruit melons and berries

These are just a few but I hope others will add to this list. My heart goes out to you and I truly do hope you get the help you need. Remember your therapist by law can not share your information with your mother and if they do then get a new one! Be kind to yourself and you can start with changing your name on here. You are worth something and we all think so!!

Edited November 1, 2013 by Beach Lover

[TexSIN 9]

Last night I drank a whole bunch for halloween' date=' and during the past four days or so I have gone through like almost 4 boxes of Cereal, and not the good kind.

I see people post on a support group Im in (not sure why Im in it..like...it does nothing for me but see people succeeding...yay them...)

All this surgery did for me was make me drop like 60 pounds in the matter of 6 weeks or so, and made me not handle my alcohol at ALL. So I'm THAT guy when I go to college parties. And by THAT guy, I mean the guy who is the most drunk. I dont want to be the most drunk.

I wonder if my stomach stretched all the way out? I never feel full anymore. My hair is falling out at an alarming rate, my shower/bathtub is a mess because I have like tens of dozens of hair strands just all around...

yay life.[/quote']

I assume you're a guy so I feel comfortable saying quit being a f**king b***h. Man up and focus on what is important in life. f**k college parties and drinking beer. Why'd you bother throwing cash and time away just to eatballvthe same **** you were?

[PdxMan 4,292]

Wow ... soooo ... a lot of harsh reactions here, for sure. Before posting something harsh, reflect on your own demons and struggles. Have you ever struggled with depression or had the feeling that you just didn't care what happens to you?

The OP may be dealing with some depression. This is such a difficult thing as denial, rage, self-loathing, apathy and well, depression sets in. It can be difficult to see the forest for the trees. The denial of responsibility creates a vicious circle where the person spirals downward. Not recognizing this and seeking helps further aggravates the issues.

To the OP, think about it. What is the worst thing that can happen if you reach out for help?

What is the best thing that could happen?

The truth lies somewhere in between, but it only starts when you reach out for help. You recognize this and have taken the first step by posting here.

Take the next step.