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Divorce rate..post op

Mrs.FullerRN

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Alyjourneys    117

Alyjourneys
Posted

I really think people need to read things a little better before getting all insulted. In addition to not knowing the tone something is being written in, we are all entitled to think what we want. Opinions are just that, opinions. Feel what you want. Do what you want. It's your life!!! But pls, if you post on here, remember you are opening the door to replies that you may not agree with. It's an open forum. It is what it is!!!

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Alyjourneys    117

Alyjourneys
Posted

No' date=' it was not directed at you. I was read the thread and saw a number of women bashing men, which is a trigger for me. There is bad behavior in both sexes, but it seems that some women take great pleasure in bashing the male species because of the misdeeds of their particular man.[/quote']

I so agree with you.

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newcocoame    54

newcocoame
Posted

It wasn't for you and I was specific about what she wrote so I'm not sure why you assumed this was for you. Good night!!!!!

Have a wonderful evening, Alyjourney! If my tone was rather harsh, it was unintentional. I really was wishing everyone a great weekend. I'm having a blast at Houston's Reggae Festival! :)

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CouchToHealthy    9

CouchToHealthy
Posted

...

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CouchToHealthy    9

CouchToHealthy
Posted

Now let's be fair about this. Speaking from a guy who no longer has anything resembling Man Tits. Not any more. And that is your point' date=' right, you are improving yourself, and do not see why he is not interested in doing the same. Here is what I felt after reading your post. Okay, you have made a decision to change your life - AWESOME and conrats to you. BUT you would not need that change if you (and I and many many more) had not let ourselves go and made many a bad decision. So you have decided that you want more out of life. Here is my question. How long did it take you to make that decision? Presumably a while. What about him? how much time does he get? If you start looking great - or at least a ton better, is that an encouragement for him? I would only say that none of us - peeking into you life with 5 lines of information - have the answer. But I think a spouse has a little duty to help make changes in us as well. I was a stud athlete, professional, world ranked - that is what my wife married. Then 10 years in I got fat, not big, fat. She stuck by me and put up with my beer drinking and over eating. Now I look good again and I am so glad she is here. But you know what, she is 30 pounds over weight - maybe more - but that is okay. I love her for her. She stuck by me when I was a pig. 30 pounds on her at 5 feet tall is a lot - but I will work with her to get her lower - she wants that and I want that - why? because we are still in love. 25 years of her putting up with my retarded self - and we still care. My guess would be that there is more than just the weight issue. It may be an indicator of the relationship - maybe the weight is not the issue, it is that desire you have for more, and he does not have that. Again, it is easy to be Dr. Phil with 10% of the info, but make sure that it is the weight that is a problem, and not the lack of drive and ambition. Here is why, anyone (with great effort) can lose weight - not everyone can have that desire to move up and be determined for success. So I will get off my "Mr. know-it -all" soap box and wish you the best of luck - love is easy - marriage is hard - make sure you are carefully assessing you issues. And best of luck on your weight loss journey.[/quote']

I loved this! Thanks for this perspective. I'm also feeling a little resentment toward my husband for not showing any initiative to change. I know I need to see a therapist to work these feelings out. I love him very much and don't want this to affect our relationship. We've had a lot to work on the 3 years we've been married. Just learning to live together (we didn't before we got married), communication, etc. Now add this to the mix and it's a bomb waiting to explode. But I know he's worth working through my feelings and your post was very encouraging. Thanks!

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CouchToHealthy    9

CouchToHealthy
Posted

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valdostaGA    149

valdostaGA
Posted

Divorced 4 months post op but was already discussed before surgery

Sent from my iPhone using VST

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Go To Topic Listing POST-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A

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    • Aunty Mamo

      Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
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    • BeanitoDiego

      BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
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    • BeanitoDiego

      BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
      · 0 replies
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    • ChunkCat

      ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
      · 0 replies
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    • BeanitoDiego

      BeanitoDiego

      Still purging all of the larger clothing. This morning, a shirt that I ADORED wearing ended up on top. Hard to let it go, but it was also hard to let go of those habits that also no longer serve my highest good. Onward and upward!
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