Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Sad sad realization.....



Recommended Posts

First of all, im 16 days post op. Down 35 lbs. That being sad, i realized last night that........drum roll................ food NO LONGER MAKES ME HAPPY. I realized that and was immediately so sad. I told my husband my lightbulb and he says "Good!" I said no!!! Its sad!!! Anyone else had this reaction to this realization?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wasn't sad when I realized that food was no longer my motivator, but the next step is to realize that food is just fuel. It's weird to me that now I choose food based on it's Protein content more than what it tastes like. I still crave some things like Cheetos and sugar, but I'm pretty good about having a bite or two and then moving past those foods now. I eat like a skinny person. LOL You'll get there and be amazed at how much your thinking has changed when you do get there. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Cutting your life short because of food is even sadder. There are a lot of other activities in life that you will be able to do to make up for it. Go climb a mountain or ride a bike or run a 5k race. How about keeping up with the kids or wearing the clothes your friends look so go in? There is just so much more to life than eating. You just need to find it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

While I can't say food no longer makes me happy, I am not nearly as excited about food or preparing meals as I once was. Now it seems like way too much goes into making a delicious meal to only be able to eat a tiny amount of it. Why order out and have the food sit in my fridge for days only to throw away most of it. Feels like a huge waste of money. I am no one to give up on enjoying preparing and eating food. I'm 19 days post op and down 30 lbs so far. Here's to you getting back to happy about food in a healthy way and to me re-discovering the joy of cooking and eating. We can do this!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I felt like that in the beginning, but once the weight started melting off my body and I got healthier and sexier, omg I do not miss food lol I still have my bad cheat days, but overall, so thanful for the sleeve..Im sure u wont be sad a year out! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was a huge food addict. Food was one of the few things that made me happy. Now I don't really get as excited as I was did. I honestly don't miss binging or eating "bad" foods.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am sad because...everything I enjoyed about my life (and I don't have alot to enjoy in the first place) is gone...a friend asked me to go to dinner last night - I had to say no! A guy has asked me to go to lunch and dinner this week - again, two more no's. My dad just called - he has made my fav homemade veggie Soup - I can't even go up to see him because I can't eat it! Another no! Another friend wanted to go to the mall yesterday. I had to say no. How could I go & explain I was just drinking Water? My brother asked me what I was fixing for annual Easter dinner - I said I am going out of town instead (which is a lie).....I am beyond sad. Good or bad, food played a major role in my life. And what little life I was living is gone...I am beyond sad....

I am only 2 weeks out, but I am beginning to fear this will be the biggest regret of my life...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Did you not tell anyone? I am sure your friend may be supportive and blend some off for you. Veggie Soup is awesome. :) I have a support group meeting that I am unsure I will be able to make. I will be a week out and IF I feel good enough to go I would imagine I could ask the waitress to strain soup broth. Maybe I can ask her for apple juice and Water to water some down...

hmmm

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am sad because...everything I enjoyed about my life (and I don't have alot to enjoy in the first place) is gone...a friend asked me to go to dinner last night - I had to say no! A guy has asked me to go to lunch and dinner this week - again' date=' two more no's. My dad just called - he has made my fav homemade veggie Soup - I can't even go up to see him because I can't eat it! Another no! Another friend wanted to go to the mall yesterday. I had to say no. How could I go & explain I was just drinking Water? My brother asked me what I was fixing for annual Easter dinner - I said I am going out of town instead (which is a lie).....I am beyond sad. Good or bad, food played a major role in my life. And what little life I was living is gone...I am beyond sad....

I am only 2 weeks out, but I am beginning to fear this will be the biggest regret of my life...[/quote']

Have you told anyone about your surgery? While I totally understand wanting to keep it private, choosing not to tell anyone can really limit your social interactions in the beginning if you don't want anyone asking questions about your food choices (or lack of food). I know that it's really hard right now, and maybe you could find one or two people in your life that you could talk to about it so you would have an outlet to be social with them without food being a factor. I know that's not possible for everyone but it really helped me get trough the beginning stages of my lap band journey.

But. Don't give up hope. There are so many posts from so many different people that talk about being 6 months out and being able to eat all the foods they ate before, just in smaller portions. You will start to feel more "normal" soon, once you're off the strict limitations of the starting post-op diet!! Ordering a soup at lunch and only eating the broth is a good way to keep lunch or dinner dates and just you can just say you're feeling a little under the weather if you don't want to deal with questions about it!!

Seclusion from the world and your friends and family, will only make you feel worse emotionally. Work on ways to see people without revealing your business with food, like maybe a movie or big box store shopping! Or maybe consider talking to a couple of really close friends or family about what you're going through. But either way, it WILL get better and you'll be healthy!! In the meantime, don't hesitate to reach out here at VST. There are so many people that have gone through the same feelings. I haven't been there with a sleeve yet, but I have with my lap band and my heart is with you!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Michelle1024 - No, I told no one about this. I have no appetite/thirst right now. By the diet/nutrition materials the dr gave me, I can't really eat anything substantial til 6 weeks...I think going out to eat til then is not wise for me. I know eventually in the future I will order somewhat regularly in the future, but will ask for half or kiddie size portions; I am afraid I'd try to eat what I always di if I go out now or even up to my dad's. Next Wednesday, I can eat Peanut Butter & bananas. The following I think eggs & toast are the biggie. The next fish. And then, April 10 is more normal food. I just feel like a weak-minded freak right now who is missing out time with friends & family & even a date or two because of not being to eat...regretting it more by the second. Thanks for your suggestions. Maybe I can have dad's Soup in the future!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Go with your friends! Go on the date! Just order broth Soup or something that is within your current dietary guidelines. You can choose to be miserable or you can choose to live... and I think you've already chosen to live by having your sleeve. :) I went out to eat with friends within the first few weeks. They understood when I ordered egg drop soup and only drank that broth at the Chinese restaurant. They understood when I asked the waitress to blend me some cream of broccoli soup at Ruby Tuesdays and they understand now when I order a child's portion of grilled chicken/fish and a side of steamed veggies. It's not even a topic of discussion. That's just how I eat. I don't comment when they order a huge steak, baked potato and veggies, then add dessert on top (unless I'm asking for a single bite of some confection). Once you're through the restrictive stages of your diet, things will get easier, but there ARE ways to be social now without breaking the diet. :) Good luck!! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh, I meant to add.. if that guy has asked you out for more than one meal after you've said no, he's really interested. You could always suggest some kind of alternative date that doesn't revolve around food. Have coffee, go for a walk, take in a movie, anything...if you're interested. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

She is right. You are doing this so you can live! Honestly I see my boyfriend ordering and eating very little and I am very jealous because I know I finish off most everything I order right now. By not letting a few people know you are almost alienating yourself. Don't punish yourself for making a very smart choice for yourself. Of course I say this and I completely don't know your family. There may be more reasons behind it. Good luck with this.. HUGS!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I no longer obtain real joy from eating. I told my mother that I no sooner begin eating, than I am full (we are talking about 2 ounces or 2 tablespoons). I miss the joy of eating sometimes. But I have lost 38 pounds and I am back into clothes that I never thought I would fit into again. The joy of eating was killing me. I think that must be the definition of addiction. I knew what I was doing was killing me and I couldn't stop. I have now removed the choice. I wanted French fries the other day. A large order of McDonald's french fries The desire took me by surprise. I chuckled to myself and said, "well, heck, I would only be able to eat a few fries and I wouldn't enjoy them a tenth as much as I imagine, totally not worth it". That is my new relationship with bad food. Totally not worth it. I did this to get off my CPAP and to avoid diabetes. And I am glad this is not reversible, otherwise, I believe I woul give in to my addiction and end up killing myself with food.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

We all were food addicts or wouldn't have needed surgery. Hang in therev

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×