I am scheduled for surgery on February 26. I am trying to decide if I should tell people, or keep this a dark secret? Both before the surgery, and after surgery?

So far, I've only told about three people that are very close to me. I don't know why I am hesitating just telling everyone I meet, but not sure if I want to. I can't tell you why I wouldn't want to. Maybe I am a little embarrassed. A lot of the people that I know now met me about five years ago after I had just lost about 100 pounds.

I'd like to hear opinions from those that have done the surgery… Both that have told people, and that have kept it a secret.

Thanks.

I have been taught that lesson many times, hopefully I have learned it, time will tell.

I have noticed that how you tell folks has much to do with how they perceive it. Tell them like it's something you are trying to hide and they will sense your weakness and join you in looking down at you. Tell them like it's a real accomplishment and something you are proud of like getting a new Jaguar and they will resist putting you down knowing that you probably have a good defense.

Well said!

.....I have noticed that how you tell folks has much to do with how they perceive it. Tell them like it's something you are trying to hide and they will sense your weakness and join you in looking down at you. Tell them like it's a real accomplishment and something you are proud of like getting a new Jaguar and they will resist putting you down knowing that you probably have a good defense.

I totally agree. I haven't been met with much negativity, and maybe that's in part because I have been so positive about the surgery being the best thing for me and a great step forward in getting healthy and fit.

I have been taught that lesson many times' date=' hopefully I have learned it, time will tell.

I have noticed that how you tell folks has much to do with how they perceive it. Tell them like it's something you are trying to hide and they will sense your weakness and join you in looking down at you. Tell them like it's a real accomplishment and something you are proud of like getting a new Jaguar and they will resist putting you down knowing that you probably have a good defense.[/quote']

Yesss you are absolutely correct!

i decided to keep my circle of people small - it really is a personal decision - you will know what is the right thing to say. Just be comfortable with it

Shitt I wish I could take back some who no people are paying far too much attention to me! Lol

Once I was approved I told everyone it happened to come up with. My co workers would have noticed me gone for a month (yes I took a month off) and would have just called and asked if I was okay anyone. Enough people know that I don't need to explain repeatedly anymore. Who cares who knows. The weight loss will be obvious.

I'm in the same boat. I had my surgery on Tuesday and only told 5 people. My mother doesn't know. My family is in Chicago and I live in Dallas. I know my coworkers will start asking questions and I haven't decided how to respond. I don't know if I'm embarrassed or just being silly. I know we shouldn't care what other people think or say about us but deep down inside I care. No one wants to be talked about behind their backs. I'm going to tell my mom this weekend and slowly decide when or if I tell my coworkers. I know this sounds strange but I'm so glad to hear that I'm not the only one that's experiencing this. I'm so glad I found this site!