As always, parents will knock you down and out....they akways have their thumb pressed right on you!

My parents tried too and I am a 40 year old widow with two kids and have been out of thier house for a very long time. I had to stand strong because I have to do this for me and my health. You know what is best for you! If you really want this and you are ready do what you know is best! Never doubt yourself.

If you've been talked out of it then why waste our time posting here?

Gillopez, arent you a ray of sunshine tonight!?

maybe Melanie is young. Clearly she's frustrated.

Do NOT let then talk you out of it. They probably don't understand all the diets you've been on, the guilt, the self hatred, etc that you're going through.

They may have raised you but now YOU are in charge of you. If your life story turn out crappy, you can't blame them, only yourself. Don't let anyone take it from you.

I read a quote last night by "egg face" (she had wls) that was PERFECT for me.

"Don't be afraid of Dieing, be afraid of never truly living."

Thanks everyone...and gillopez...you know what you can do with your smart-ass attitude!

Aw Melanie, so sorry YOU allowed yourself to be talked out of it, but glad you will only go through with the surgery when YOU are ready.

I have read a couple of your past posts and believe you are making a decision best for you at this time. Just definitely live life on your own terms.

I see nothing but rainbows and butterflies in my future. Lol. J/k. Anything worth having, is worth fighting for. Maybe I am a wuss, but I haven't told any one about my surgery because I don't want to hear their nonsense. I have only told the people who I know will support me. Literally a handful of people.

Good luck on your journey, the one you choose.

Thanks everyone...and gillopez...you know what you can do with your smart-ass attitude!

gillopez has a point but the fact that you posted here means you have not resolved the issue of whether or not to have the surgery. Good luck as you continue to work this out.

gillopez has a point but the fact that you posted here means you have not resolved the issue of whether or not to have the surgery. Good luck as you continue to work this out.

The fact that she posted here tells me that she wants the surgery, & is either looking for support, or a way to respond to her parents that will help them understand where she is coming from.

Gillopez had no point...but just to be a mean and hateful low-life...and gillopez...if you feel like I'm wasting your "oh so precious" time...then dont read my posts...go somewhere else to be a poor pathetic excuse for a human being!

The fact that she posted here tells me that she wants the surgery' date=' & is either looking for support, or a way to respond to her parents that will help them understand where she is coming from.[/quote']

Melanie, not to sound harsh, but, you are 40 years old. Why are you still letting your parents rule your life? I'm sure they are just concerned about what "could" happen.

But, let's look at what WILL happen if you don't do something to get your weight under control.

1. You will resent yourself for not taking the initiative to address the situation when you had the opportunity n

2. You will resent your parents for "dooming" you to an unhealthy life.

3. You will die sooner

4. You will not experience the fullness of life you can at a health weight

5. I'll leave the rest of this list to you. I'm sure you can add a few to it.

Gillopez had no point...but just to be a mean and hateful low-life...and gillopez...if you feel like I'm wasting your "oh so precious" time...then dont read my posts...go somewhere else to be a poor pathetic excuse for a human being!

Well hey hey... you are capable of standing up for yourself. Now try some of that with your parents... it's your life... and if/when you do go through with the surgery... you'll love life more with every passing day...

As always' date=' parents will knock you down and out....they akways have their thumb pressed right on you![/quote']

No no no. Don't let anyone talk you out of this very important step in your life. I was sleeved on Monday and I feel great. Poor choice of words but it was a piece of cake!!!

My parents were not thrilled with my decision. They kept their mouth MOSTLY shut on the issue with a few comments like, "But don't you think you could do it on your own?" "Do you really think this is the only way." I had my husband's blessing (with trepidation, but full support) and my kids were on board and that was all that mattered. But really even if my kids hadn't understood I would have gone forward. (I needed my husband because of course it did cost money). Ultimately you are in charge of your life, yes it does affect others, but if you are an adult then your parents are secondary. If you have children/SO then they could have a say, but ultimately this is on you.

The day of surgery my parents came to the hospital and with them and my husband we prayed before surgery. I did break down a little and said, "If anything goes wrong, please don't be mad at me. I know I have to do this to get my life back. And the only thing I am afraid of is if something goes wrong and I become a burden to you all." That was my only fear about disappointing them. They all reassured me, we hugged and here I am two months later feeling so much better. All my family is so excited for me.

So ultimately your parents will understand, they are fearful (understandably) but they need to realize if you don't get your health back they may lose you sooner rather than later due to complications from obesity.

Stand strong, do what YOU need to do to get better! ((hugs))

Everyone is right.... you cannot let your parents talk you out of this. It's YOUR health, It's YOUR Life, It's YOUR happiness and It's YOUR future... NO ONE, not even your parents should change your mind when you KNOW that this surgery is life saving. I hope you re-consider and go forward with the surgery... you won't regret it, however if you do not go through with it you will likely regret that decision for a long time and probably always resent your parents for talking you out of it.

You need to talk to your parents again and tell them that you are having surgery. Explain to them the reasons that you are having it. Tell them what having this surgery and losing the weight means to you. Help them to understand the struggles that you have been through to lose weight on your own without success. Ask them to respect your decison just as you would respect a decision that they might make regarding their health one day. Tell them that you would like their support in your decision, but no matter what they chose to do let them know that YOUR decision is made and leave it at that.

Best of luck, I hope that we can all share in your success in the near future!!!

Unless your parents are blackmailing you or they are supporting you and can withdraw that support I don't see how they have their thumb pressed on you. I'm 29 years old, my parents forbid me to have the surgery. I had the surgery and they were both at the hospital. I'm an adult. What's stopping you? I suspect it's you that is backing out of the surgery not them.

OK, let's tone the poo flinging down a little on this thread, please.

Melanie, as been pointed out it is YOUR decision. Unless your parent are paying for it, or providing the insurance then it again is up to YOU to heed their advice or not.

We all wish the best for you no matter what decision you make.