Throwing in the towel

[health1st 1]

BJean, you really didn't change the thread. It is all about trying to figure out what works for us individually and with my limited experiece, the band really is individual. So many different experiences. Isnt' this board great for learning!! Good for you to get as much information as you can!

[marys 2]

Thank you all - the support and non-judgemental suggestions and questions have already pulled me out of the despair I've felt the last few days. Interestingly, today I tried a lean cusine chicken pannini - had 3 nibbles and just pb'd a little - ugh -

Strawarts - You didn't steal my thunder - we are in synch - this band drives me more crazy than dieting ever did (or close).

Teresita thanks for the suggestion of TOPS it is the one thing I've never tried so I will because I do need in person support.

Sleepyjean - I decided to get this band because I was at my wits end with dieting - have done every program, every diet under the sun, since i was 11 and even though they have never worked in keeping the weight off, they usually work in the short term and I so want to get at least 25lbs off, I am willing to try them again.

And, Pete, I too have obeyed orders though not 100% of the time. I did not find this group until after I was banded and before that I talked to coordinators who were successful with the band and a few patients who again were successful/happy. I did not talk to anyone who wasn't happy and I admit it, I was blinded and heard what I wanted to - yes, i knew it was a tool and I would have to do work but I feel like I'm doing the work I 'signed up for' and its still not working

I'll close by echoing Strawarts and others sentiment - this band is so damn fickle - I'm thinking one second wide open - anything goes in - the next i'm tight as a drum and not knowing what will work from meal to meal just messes with my head as much as my pre band "what diet will i be on today" mentality.

I will keep everyone posted and still plan to stay around - Thanks, Mary

[Elisabethsew 50]

I can definitely relate to working for every pound lost.

[BJean 16]

healthlst: I called and have an appt. with my doc to go over everything I'm worried about. I asked about a mentor, but the assistant suggested my just talking to the doctor. She probably sensed my case of nerves.

I appreciate your comments and they helped me decide to get more info since I am worried so much about additional repair work that I'm to have when he places the LB.

[kilcollins 0]

I too am now scared! I just hope that I will be able to lose the weight I need because this is costing a lot of money. I have tried everything out there and this is my final straw. But reading these posts here, really does scare me. I want to be successful and lose weight to make myself healthier.

[squiggle 1]

i realize that i'm just a baby bandster, so i really don't have anything that i can contribute as far as the amounts of weight lost or the fickle nature of the band. (i have, however, had one hell of a week that i've had the band if that earns me any points...)

but, even if i have to struggle for every pound lost and i have to be ever vigilant about what goes in my mouth and how it goes in, i view that as one step away from all of the awful things that can happen when you're this overweight.

sure, the band might be hard to manage, but so is diabetes. so is blood pressure. so is heart disease. nothing about being obese, morbidly obese, or even super morbidly obese is easy except getting there.

even if my band only serves to act as my conscience or the pain in my butt sitting on my shoulder whispering "do better, do better" it will have been worth it.

jmo.

i am very sorry to hear about those that are having problems with the band, though. i can only imagine how frustrating and saddening that must be after going into this with such high hopes.

[vinesqueen 2]

Well, I'm convinced that if you are not losing weight on a reasonable amount of calories, (or even unreasonably small numbers of calories) then you need to start screaming and demanding answers.

If you are not losing at any calorie amount, then there is something else the matter. I let the band almost drive me into an eating disorder because I couldn't lose weight. It didn't matter if I at 1600 calories or 600 calories, I still couldn't lose weight.

Push for answers. Do not let the doctors push back. You deserve answers why the band doesn't work for you. Demand the truth. Oh sure, it isn't easy, not by a long shot. But if I hadn't demanded answers I would still be sitting here with a about 20 loss and not knowing why.

If the doctor tells you he doesn't know why you don't lose weight, ask for a referal to see someone else. Fight for answers, your health could be at stake.

[kilcollins 0]

It is the high hopes that we all have before trying something new and hoping this is it! This is how I have been feeling for the past 3 yrs when I first found out about the lb. Now that I am paying for this myself and doing a lot of praying, this is my final straw. The other surgeries for weight loss are not an option for me, THEY REALLY SCARE ME! I am jumping off the deep end! You are right about the other things you have to deal with, high BP, cholestorol, diabetes, etc... they are also hard to manage. I am glad this is here to read so I am not blind-sided by anything. I think just about anything that can go wrong with the band has been in a forum in one way or another, and I am able to learn about it

[HarleyNana 10]

I would never judge anyone "sporting" the band! I find it totally amazing how we can all have the same little gadget in us with such varying outcomes. I have been banded over a year and a half and haven't lost a pound in 6 months, maybe more. I have accepted that and accepted myself for the healthier, happier person that I now am.

My mom, who is 75 is banded and we can sit and eat a meal together and what we can tolerate and keep down is so different.

If I never lose another lb, the ride and the $$ was worth it for me, but again, that's j-ust me, (maybe it's the size 12 thing too), but do what makes you happy.

I can so relate to the pb's, asking for a seat near the restrooms, etc, but it has been worth it for me, though many would perceive this as struggling, I've accepted this as it's as good as it's probably gonna get.

Hugs to you all and I wish you the best, what ever you decide, don't lose touch with us here.

[GayleTX 1]

I have noticed that most of the people who say that 'the band didn't work for me' are mainly people who would be considered 'lightweights' to begin with. Not all, but the majority of the ones I've noticed are not terribly heavy.

I don't know that that fact would have anything to do with it or not. Whether it might be related to reasons for being overwieght? length of time overweight? health issues ? maybe the heaviest among us have reached such a state of desperation that we work harder at it or don't give us as easily as some?

Just pondering.....and so sorry that it's not the magic wand that we all long for.

[Pete53 0]

Gayle:

How do you like Dr Maese he is my Doc for fills and Stress Test?

Pete

[leatha_g 4]

I definitely agree that those with lower BMI seem to have a harder time with the band. I was not what I consider low BMI at all, however, it's those last 25-50 lbs that seem to have most of us stuck.

It seems the statistics are clear, some only lose 50-60% excess weight, some lose more.

[StrawartS 2]

Gayle,

Without naming names, I also know several people (300 - 500 lb. range) who are not losing with the band like other high BMI-ers you might see who are more successful. There are, of course, exceptions to every generalization.

That being said, I agree that lightweights have a harder time, but only because the caloric differences between our start and goal weights are so slight. For example, to maintain my body at 195 lbs., with my very limited physical activity, I need to consume 2,444 calories a day. To maintain at my current weight, 168, I need to consume 2,234 calories a day. It's very easy for me to fluctuate between those two numbers and lose and gain back several pounds every other day.

For someone who weighs 350 lbs, the caloric maintenance level is 3,651. Compare that to the 2,200 or so to get to my current weight. And these numbers are still high for a bandster. So when someone who weighs 350 lbs. goes from eating nearly 4,000 calories a day to around 1,000 post op, yeah, the weight IS going to fall off.

To speak to your other point...I would tend to agree that lightweights might be less motivated to deal with the unpleasant side effects of the band. My weight didn't interfere with my mobility or my social or professional life. My tolerance for discomfort just to lose another 25 lbs. is very low. If I needed to lose 200 lbs., I might feel differently about PB pain.

I know we're talking semantics here, but I prefer to talk about the side effects that we are willing to tolerate rather than who "works harder" or "gives up" more easily. That discrepancy in word choice doesn't reflect on you or what I know is a sincere hypothesis, it's just me trying to make myself feel better.

All that being said, I would like to mention one more band mis-truth, at least as told to me by my surgeon. I was told that the band is so great because it is adjustable for life. If I ever start to regain, I can just go and get another fill. That is simply not true. And not because I'm a whiny little bitch and can't deal with a PB, but because there is a point at which a certain amount of fill will shut you off completely. Anyway, that rant is off-topic, but I wanted to clear that point up. I personally thought that you can just keep filling the band up to lose weight forever, but it's just not like that.

I forgot what we were supposed to be talking about.

[cashley 0]

What I didn't realize before surgery and wish to god I would have read somewhere was how easy it is to cheat....

I'm not saying I have no will power but I honestly do not like many healthy foods and didn't realize that junk food would go down ok while healthly food would cause pain.

I was under the impression that the band would restrict all food and that I would eat less. I was hoping to not care so much about "candy" or "ice cream" or "milk shakes"... well it turns out when I'm hurting and hungry those are the things that actually go down. That just sucks!!!

I had a few weeks of pure heaven with the band where I didn't care at all about food.... I didn't want anything because I was in constant pain from the PB's. I actually liked that feeling...

then I learned how well ice cream went down and since I wasn't eating hardly anything I figured a scoop wouldn't hurt.... now it's like I'm fighting the addiction again. The addiction of junk food that the band didn't help with.

Sooooo my advice is if you are a person who likes junk food this might not be the right surgery for you.

PS... Yes I'm a rule breaker, I ate mushies before I was supposed too becuase I was friggin hungry and isn't that why we all got the band because we were friggin hungry and couldn't control what we put in our mouths?

I'm just tired of being hungry or in pain! I wish I could just find some simple foods that are solids and not candy... that keep me full without pain.

[StrawartS 2]

String cheese! I always carry string cheese with me - as soon as I get hungry, I eat one, and the hunger pains totally go away. I eat a lot of ground chicken, too. Sandwich meats sliced very thin go down well for me - ham, salami, etc.