Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

SEX...TMI??? I Know But I Gotta "ASK"!!!



Recommended Posts

I agree with feedyoureye. finding a good counselor may help.

fluffy, lol i DID go on a shopping spree last week since I'm CLOSE to goal size and considering winter stuff can be a little baggy and be ok, i finally gave in. i'm holding off on serious bra/underwear spending until i'm at goal..at least for VS/Fred's stuff. Believe me I've been looking! I did buy several bra/underwear sets at LB recently so I hope that boosts the girls back where they belong. I think I may just end up putting a "no braless sex" rule in place :P;) dh could care if i wore a burlap sack he's so enamored with my new body so i know it's all in my own head. funny story... there's a rumor going around that my dh is going around town with some skinny chick NOT his wife (when in fact it IS his wife..even my closest friends have told me i look like someone entirely not like me)... LOL so our joke is that he's cheating on his wife with his wife.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree with feedyoureye. finding a good counselor may help.

fluffy, lol i DID go on a shopping spree last week since I'm CLOSE to goal size and considering winter stuff can be a little baggy and be ok, i finally gave in. i'm holding off on serious bra/underwear spending until i'm at goal..at least for VS/Fred's stuff. Believe me I've been looking! I did buy several bra/underwear sets at LB recently so I hope that boosts the girls back where they belong. I think I may just end up putting a "no braless sex" rule in place :tongue2: :wink1: dh could care if i wore a burlap sack he's so enamored with my new body so i know it's all in my own head. funny story... there's a rumor going around that my dh is going around town with some skinny chick NOT his wife (when in fact it IS his wife..even my closest friends have told me i look like someone entirely not like me)... LOL so our joke is that he's cheating on his wife with his wife.

LOL! I love it. Going around town with skinny chick. That is hilarious.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

ahhhh that is funny!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It's his own insecurities that are coming out n being projected onto u. Don't let it get u down. Help him get healthy too ;0)

Sigh... was looking forward to that estrogen storm everyone talks about. The one where the fat melts and releases estrogen and the libido goes through the roof... sigh... I guess menopause and the hysterectomy leached all the estrogen. Maybe husbands comments don't help either.... You lost 40 lbs... where... hmmn your stomach is collapsing in on itself, u gonna lose that on your neck? ur breasts used to be fuller, you got what... about 40 lbs left just in you stomach? how come ur stomach is starting to sag... u need to lose more and it will go away...

Sorry had to vent.

Khy

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

way better!!!! whoo hoo! just discovered a position that used to be my favorite before weight gain, and havent been able to do in a very long time. i was just able to do it again :D

loving it!! so is the hubby!

i agree with the others that it is his self confidence going down worrying that other men are gonna start noticing you. my hubby has already told me that he is worried about that. i told him that i chose him before i gained the weight and there is no reason for me to not keep chosing him after i lose it too. he loved me through all of this and has been my biggest supporter. even when i was at my highest weight and i had to step on the scale and was obviosly worried about his reaction to how much i weighed he said to me, "dont worry about how much you weigh baby, i love you no matter what your size is."

how could any other man take my eyes off of him when he loves me through thick and thin, literally.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

way better!!!! whoo hoo! just discovered a position that used to be my favorite before weight gain, and havent been able to do in a very long time. i was just able to do it again :biggrin2:

loving it!! so is the hubby!

i agree with the others that it is his self confidence going down worrying that other men are gonna start noticing you. my hubby has already told me that he is worried about that. i told him that i chose him before i gained the weight and there is no reason for me to not keep chosing him after i lose it too. he loved me through all of this and has been my biggest supporter. even when i was at my highest weight and i had to step on the scale and was obviosly worried about his reaction to how much i weighed he said to me, "dont worry about how much you weigh baby, i love you no matter what your size is."

how could any other man take my eyes off of him when he loves me through thick and thin, literally.

My situation is similar. My husband knew me way back from the time I was 13. I was in dance for so many years so I was thin. I was even thin through high school after I quit dance. And yet, I was still thin-ish when we first started dating in 00. He was right there with me gaining and has always been loving & accepting of me "whether you weigh 160 pounds or 500 pounds". I think my husband is ok with other men noticing me (as long as that's where it stays) because he knows it's a confidence booster for me. I used to get checked out all the time and then nothing for a lot of years when I was obese. He chuckled when the two bartenders were falling over themselves to come get my order before they noticed I was with someone.

I wish the husbands who have these insecurities would just be cool. On top of all the good pure reasons we choose surgery, they've got to know there's another small (or sometimes bigger) reason and it's them. We want to be attractive for them and have great sex again and be confident. I know that's one of the things I was excited about going into this. I wouldn't feel ashamed of my body and feeling awkward/unable to breathe...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'd love to know what position that is!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My situation is similar. My husband knew me way back from the time I was 13. I was in dance for so many years so I was thin. I was even thin through high school after I quit dance. And yet, I was still thin-ish when we first started dating in 00. He was right there with me gaining and has always been loving & accepting of me "whether you weigh 160 pounds or 500 pounds". I think my husband is ok with other men noticing me (as long as that's where it stays) because he knows it's a confidence booster for me. I used to get checked out all the time and then nothing for a lot of years when I was obese. He chuckled when the two bartenders were falling over themselves to come get my order before they noticed I was with someone.

I wish the husbands who have these insecurities would just be cool. On top of all the good pure reasons we choose surgery, they've got to know there's another small (or sometimes bigger) reason and it's them. We want to be attractive for them and have great sex again and be confident. I know that's one of the things I was excited about going into this. I wouldn't feel ashamed of my body and feeling awkward/unable to breathe...

yes, i have been with my hubby since i was 15 years old. when we first started dating i was 5'9" and 120 pounds. so i was super skinny. when we got married, i was 18 and still weighed the same.....then i got pregnant and gained one hundred pounds! i went back down to about 160 and looked good...and he started getting insecure because we lived on a military base where there is like 10 men to one women. so yet again i got pregnant....and gained more weight, lost that baby, got pregnant again, gained more weight, lost that baby...never lost any of the weight from those pregnancy's and then got pregnant again. by the time i got pregnant with the 4th pregnancy i weighed 200 pounds again, and at the end of that one, which i didnt miscarry, i had gained another 120 pounds. he loved me the same at all of the weights, but i didnt love myself the same. i was discusted with my size. i think he knows finally that i have been with him for 20 years and im not going anywhere, not at 120 pounds, and not at 320 pounds. i guess we are all guilty of feeling insecure with something in our lives. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

So much better which is funny, cause i though it was good before. Now I strut, pose and shake like a hussy for my fortunate husband. Lucky me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

way better!!!! whoo hoo! just discovered a position that used to be my favorite before weight gain, and havent been able to do in a very long time. i was just able to do it again :biggrin2:

loving it!! so is the hubby!

i agree with the others that it is his self confidence going down worrying that other men are gonna start noticing you. my hubby has already told me that he is worried about that. i told him that i chose him before i gained the weight and there is no reason for me to not keep chosing him after i lose it too. he loved me through all of this and has been my biggest supporter. even when i was at my highest weight and i had to step on the scale and was obviosly worried about his reaction to how much i weighed he said to me, "dont worry about how much you weigh baby, i love you no matter what your size is."

how could any other man take my eyes off of him when he loves me through thick and thin, literally.

Where did you get him and does he have brothers???? Seriously! I want one like that!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Where did you get him and does he have brothers???? Seriously! I want one like that!

haha....no he doesnt sorry. he is truely wonderful. i am very blessed. i was fortunate to find him while i was still in highschool....yes that is right, a true highschool sweetheart. i know that i love him more now then i ever did back then, because i finally figured out what a great thing i have. he has also just gotten better and better looking with age. seriously! he is 6'2" 190lbs and has dark brown hair and steel blue eyes. he wears a short goatee, and short military crew cut! yummy! hehe

:ciappa:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

know it was addressed to the gals but I have to chime in too - YES it is better for BOTH partners after a weight loss.

Diito :)

I used to have the labido of a 14 year old...

then I had surgery... 100# down...

Sex is great- but wow- has the thoughts left the brain...

I think about it once a week... :(

what happened? whoa! everything works well- it just seems things have changed...

anyone else?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'd love to know what position that is!

I think that question was aimed at me :)

um....sideways ;P

kinda like two sissors crossing eachother. totally wonderful.

just gotta big gift from my hubby today too.....something that really made me smile, havent gotten that gift in a looooooong time!

reeeeeeaaaaaalllllly missed it!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Eve411

      April Surgery
      Am I the only struggling to get weight down. I started with weight of 297 and now im 280 but seem to not lose more weight. My nutrtionist told me not to worry about the pounds because I might still be losing inches. However, I do not really see much of a difference is this happen to any of you, if so any tips?
      Thanks
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Well recovering from gallbladder removal was a lot like recovering from the modified duodenal switch surgery, twice in 4 months yay 🥳😭. I'm having to battle cravings for everything i shouldn't have, on top of trying to figure out what happens after i eat something. Sigh, let me fast forward a couple of months when everyday isn't a constant battle and i can function like a normal person again! 😞
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×