I've been off work for a few weeks. I'm a teacher and my child attends the school where I teach. Everyone knows Ive been "very" ill. They know that I had surgery. What do I tell them when they ask me what type of surgery I had? Ive tried the " major abdominal surgery" excuse, but I think I need something better..more specific.

What should I say?

Wow... You jumped down my throat and accused me of being cruel because I wouldn't help you make up a believable lie ?? That's CLASSLESS !!!

If you'll read back, you'll see that I did not lie. If you don't want to help someone who is, don't. Just don't belittle them for making that choice. Please now, can we get back to supporting everyone instead of only the ones who've made the same choices you did?

To each his (or her) own. Do what is best for YOU. If you want to tell that is fine. If you do not want to tell that is fine too. It is no ones business how you loose the weight but they will ask so you should be prepared.

At times I feel guilty for lying. I have two stories, some times I combine them. "I am taking Topamax, a preventive for my migraines. One of the side effects is weight loss" (this is true, sadly, i did NOT lose weight when I started taking it) I also devulge part of the truth. I'm eating healthier and portion control. Ok....this is all factual, but I have FORCED portion control. There are many people who know, but there are others I am not close to and I don't feel like telling....but if it is someone who is overweight, moderately or quite a bit, I feel bad. I hate for someone to feel like a failure because I could 'do it' and they cannot. We all know, it is just about impossible to lose it and KEEP IT OFF. So.......this is what I do, and how I feel about it some of the time. So much baggage!! LoL

You have made my point. Thanks for your honesty. You are not fooling yourself into thinking you are not lying. It is simply the decision you made and that I can understand.

If you'll read back, you'll see that I did not lie. If you don't want to help someone who is, don't. Just don't belittle them for making that choice. Please now, can we get back to supporting everyone instead of only the ones who've made the same choices you did?

Sure... but when we are asked for our opinions and you choose to call names of people who don't give you the answers you want, don't expect to sweep the sh*t under the rug so easily. It pisses me off to waste my time on people who claim to want opinions, but don't !!!

At times I feel guilty for lying. I have two stories, some times I combine them. "I am taking Topamax, a preventive for my migraines. One of the side effects is weight loss" (this is true, sadly, i did NOT lose weight when I started taking it) I also devulge part of the truth. I'm eating healthier and portion control. Ok....this is all factual, but I have FORCED portion control. There are many people who know, but there are others I am not close to and I don't feel like telling....but if it is someone who is overweight, moderately or quite a bit, I feel bad. I hate for someone to feel like a failure because I could 'do it' and they cannot. We all know, it is just about impossible to lose it and KEEP IT OFF. So.......this is what I do, and how I feel about it some of the time. So much baggage!! LoL

When someone asks why you left early, do you say I was tired or I bled though my pad? Ppl don't need to know every detail of our lives. If you are like me ppl are probably accustomed to you yo-yoing. Yes they will ask, but I find the less I say the better. They will move on and forget soon enough. And you are only responsible for your own health, and weight no one elses. Do what is right for you, don't feel guilty for looking after yourself, even if that includes keeping it to yourself.

I agree that everyone should decide whether they want to tell or not.

However since most of us can't maintain weight loss by cutting carbs, exercising and increasing Water intake alone, people will eventually figure out they were not told the whole truth.

I am not trying to convince anyone to tell or not or insult Autumn Lily. Each person should do whatever they want. My point here is to state that in my opinion people will know, will talk and will think they were lied to.

I could care less if people think I lied to them. My personal life is mine to share with whom ever I want. If they cant handle that then they are not worth having as friends in the first place. I would rather be around one true person than a hundred fake ones. The ignorant people are usually so close minded that even explaining anything to them is at a loss. Life is much easier if I just live it my way.

Umm.... What... What just happened?

I read through some of the posts, but I really think that this is going a bit far. I wasn't asking for a "believable lie".... so who ever said that misinterpreted the meaning of this post. I simply wanted to get some ideas of what I could say if my co-workers ask for a more detailed explanation of my surgery.

I WILL NOT TELL A LIE... I will say that I had major abdominal surgery (which is true) because I had digestive issues (which is also true... digesting TOO MUCH food and AF). If they make mention of my weight loss I will let them that I am on a medically supervised diet (that's true too).

I don't feel the need to answer a question just because someone asks. Im not depriving people of anything by keeping by business to myself. I am a very private person and that is my right to be that way. I am also a very helpful person, but I don't necessarily have to tell my personal business to do so.

If you are different, and want to tell everyone you see that you had WLS or any sordid details of your life, then that's ok.... but my approach is ok as well.

So with that being said..... Im done

At times I feel guilty for lying. I have two stories, some times I combine them. "I am taking Topamax, a preventive for my migraines. One of the side effects is weight loss" (this is true, sadly, i did NOT lose weight when I started taking it) I also devulge part of the truth. I'm eating healthier and portion control. Ok....this is all factual, but I have FORCED portion control. There are many people who know, but there are others I am not close to and I don't feel like telling....but if it is someone who is overweight, moderately or quite a bit, I feel bad. I hate for someone to feel like a failure because I could 'do it' and they cannot. We all know, it is just about impossible to lose it and KEEP IT OFF. So.......this is what I do, and how I feel about it some of the time. So much baggage!! LoL

When asked tell the truth. Be short. If they want to know more they will let you know. Then you have no guilt. That one person who life you change forever will make it worth it.

I.....am still looking for a believable LIE. And I'm honest about it. Especially for my co workers. I work with 100% men. So. I just don't want them to know. Period.

I could care less if people think I lied to them. My personal life is mine to share with whom ever I want.

Agreed!

However my point was that on your first post you said " I have never lied" when telling people you lost weight by cutting carbs, exercising & increasing your Water. I happen to think that is a lie, so we will just agree to disagree.

I.....am still looking for a believable LIE. And I'm honest about it. Especially for my co workers. I work with 100% men. So. I just don't want them to know. Period.

LOL sorry you got lost in the shuffle.

The hiatal hernia sounds like a good one. Look it up. People here have recommended it before.

I have told my immediate group of co-workers about the surgery, and others that notice my weight loss, I tell them that I am on a high protein/low carb diet and exercising. Is it a lie by omition? Really don't care lol. Do they tell me the details of their lifes journeys? Well, yes some do and others I've no idea what goes on. Those that know me know, and those that don't and are curious, will ask how I lost the weight and that is the answer that I give. If they ask me if I had WLS, then chances are they are looking into themselves and I would tell them. But seriously, how many people would come up to you and straight out ask if you had WLS? LOL not one person in 4 1/2 months so far.

As far as the going back and forth and up and down on the subject, I think if everyone just "words" their replies a little less agressive keeping with the same honesty that they intend it won't be taken too harshly. Everyone has opinions but sometimes when they are in written form, it tends to sound more like accusations etc. Alot of times the best way to reply to something like this is to state how you are dealing with it. Just my opinion, all.

I.....am still looking for a believable LIE. And I'm honest about it. Especially for my co workers. I work with 100% men. So. I just don't want them to know. Period.

Mrs CT--some people have said hernia repair has a similar recovery time as sleeve surgery. I told my office it was a "woman thing". That shuts them up.