No matter how hard or how easy this journey becomes to you, It is always about the self battle! I believe, our worst enemies are hidden within ourselves, It is not my Ex, or my so called friends, or relatives or even LIFE issues. The main problem is always about who you are and where YOU can take YOU! Everyone got their own obstacles and issues in life but It always comes down to the person to decide when and how they are gonna step above them and carry on, also its your choice if you wanna carry on stronger or just a victim.

People dont make you the victim, you do that favor (ironically) to yourself.

I didnt mean to bore you with this intro, but after years of being nothing but that over weight girl who kept hanging her problems and excuses on her weight and stuffing as if I am burying my problems with food, I came to conclusion that I WAS THE ONE WHO DID THAT TO MYSELF, not the circumstances. When I was a young girl in school I was a very naughty one, I can barely remember this girl now, but I knew she was seeking self acceptance for no reason! she was accepted but she couldnt see it! she was loved but she wasnt wise enough to know who are these ppl who loved her that she kept pulling away from. When I got a lil bit older, I was seeking love! I had 2 failed relationships but did they fail me or did I fail them? I think now with a clearer mind before body I can actually say I FAILED my choices, I gave up so much on myself cause I never appreciated myself! so I give in to any possibility of love just cause I was afraid I will never be loved.

Now after several years of being single, fat and barely used for anything but some so called sweet flirtation, I could have easy given in more to more stuffing and crying over my poor victim self. BUT I DIDNT! I had the band 7 years ago, I lost 130 pounds over the course of 7 years, With all the battles I had with it I was considered a good patient, I never gained weight although I could have! It was so easy to be done with the band, but again I was growing stronger everyday, getting out of my shell. Even when the compliments stopped and I stopped losing weight I still wanted more, I didnt just give up , so I searched and searched for the sleeve and I had it done.

With the sleeve life is so much easier, even when it seems that it is not. I am talking first of all food wise, who hates to have a variety of everything? but in a good moderate sense?, I have never had a boring day since the sleeve, cause I am not bound to certain food or otherwise I will be gaining weight the next day. The sleeves keeps prooving to me everyday that everything is possible.

When I stop losing for several days and I say thats it I am done, the sleeve is done with me it comes back next day with a nice 1-2 pounds surprise on the scale. When I start blaming myself for the pasta bite yesterday, the sleeve still assures me that I can have this bite and still lose, When I am nasty with the sleeve (myself) it is nasty back! and thats when I try to have this extra bite or that fatty deep fried food!, or when I feel like I can eat something and it goes down easily so why not stuff myself?..

Everything is restricted yet not boring!

BUT! I still come back on here and find people comparing themselves to others weightloss, as if we are trying to find a new problem in life to start being the victim! or to just be a failure! ofcourse failure have been your good companion for few years, it is okay to miss it!! and wonder how come you are in no victim position anymore? , I will tell you and tell myself, GET OVER IT! you are just a hero for going under such procedure and for battling for ur life! some do these things in many different ways, and they are heroes in their ways, so when will be the time you applause for yourself and enjoy the journey? Dont skip this feeling!! u will miss it when u are goal is here.

you will be also missing on the layers of mental strength you could have developed instead layers of just plain worrying and stress!

When people states that yeah I look quiet bit different I just know deep inside either how jealous or how much they dont dislike me, NOW I blame them not ME! cause ME did everything and still doing absolutely all the things toward success.

If you are doing this for your kids and family, good you have a big support system and motivation, but you are actually doing it for you!, your kids will know how to survive later, cause life goes on, but you are doing it really for YOU TO ENJOY MORE OF THEM! be your biggest cheerer and your biggest inspiration. Everyday wake up feeling stronger for battling the real enemy within you, which is the strongest one of all things you can face in this life.

That is my perspective now about both happiness and success, after all band, sleeve, RNY and god knows what else he is gonna inspire ppl to invent, these are just TOOLS! for help! but you are the one who can decide to be the warrior using their tools right or just the victim standing behind a rock of excuses and fake battles.

OKAY LETS TALK SLEEVE NOW:)

as I WILL ALWAYS SAY! it is an emotional roller coaster the first few weeks, but you will get through them!

Life has been so good,

I have been more open to socializing,

I dont fear going out to eat,

I can order anything and fit it into my meal plan, I dont feel food choking me anymore so I Can have a nice sitting with the friends and family now,

I no longer turn off my mobile trying to hide away from people ( cause I dont know what to wear to hide the fat) , I no longer fetch my old friend (failure), I no longer turn down any possibility of meeting new ppl,

I no longer need huge amount of make up to just show my face and take ppl's mind away from my body,Except if I am going to a wedding.

I am no longer ashamed to sit on the pool feeling ppl staring at me, I feel normal although I am still not at goal weight

I wore sleevless shirt yesterday and I didnt feel self conscious although my first procedure to be done later is those bat wings.

I am now wearing belts cause I cant keep buying new pants every couple of weeks.

I wanna reach out to every person who is overweight and talk them up about the sleeve and how much they are wasting their time without it.

I wonder how did I fit in those old cloth! they must have been so tight and I didnt really care!

I dont look good in them now as they are so loose and I STILL dont wanna spend money on cloth that will be no use in couple of month.

I dont obsess about the scale ANYMORE.

I like the rate am losing at, I actually thank my body for doing its work and not going at full speed, cause I know the consequences.

I will be always grateful to this board and ppl here.

I had a friend convinced to have the sleeve last week and he just had it done and I feel like I SAVED his life!

I am still looking for love but now I AM NO VICTIM and AM SO MUCH WORTH IT and I wont settle for anything unless it is good enough for me!

I am at a weight that I have never seen in 15 years! and I am living the dream

YES I AM A SUCCESS cause I chose to be!

OPS: third picture should says 30 pounds down not 330! typo ofcourse:)

Your post inspired me ALOT! thank you!!!! I really needed to hear that, I almost cried lol. You look amazing! Congrats on all your success!!!!

@Candace2314 U are an inspiration yourself girl!! I always enjoy your status updates! sometimes it make me put on the closet outfit to me and run to the gym!

awww! Thanks! I love that we all can inspire each other!

I loved your post, very inspiring!!! Thanks, I can totally relate to all that you said. And wow, you are absolutely beautiful, before AND after!!! What a beauty! Congrats on your success!!

@ KellyL, AWW!! thank u so much!! I always enjoy ur posts as well, and What I really love about it the tons of research u have done on the sleeve, I always find them so informative.

Thanks for your story. It was truly inspiring. You are so pretty, even heavier you are very pretty. Now that you've lost the weight you can see the confidence your pictures. Congrats on your current sucess and the sucess of reaching your goal. Keep working your sleeve girly!!!!:bounce:

I loved your post!!! You know how I like to get my read on!!! :Banane51:

You spoke the truth about alot of things but there are two sides to everything. All of us have issues that we are trying to overcome and I think this forum is a good way to do that. We are talking to people who are just like us with like minds who have had the same or similar struggles with their love/hate relationship with food.

You keep up the good work and the good fight and keep posting cause I do enjoy reading your posts. Take really good care of yourself!! Toodles!!

Dang, girl! You are gorgeous!

Hello!

Such a good post. It is wonderful to see you are feeling succesful with your sleeve! It really is a complete change from the band :-)

Best wishes for continued success!!!!!!

You look absolutely amazing!!! Thank you for sharing your story!!!!! **HAPPY DANCE**

Damn u read this post and got a warm feeling. This pat is extremely inspirational. I will be going got my sleeve in October I can't wait. I'm grateful for your words.

Wow, love it, Loooou! You are looking fabulous in that red dress!

Well said girl!!! I like how you told it like it is! I agree with everything you wrote. We do need to do this for ourselves! I like a quote I read on here today that kind of fits the tone of your post: "Life has no remote control... you have to get up and change it yourself"! So true we do! I can definitely tell YOU are because you are looking fabulous!!! Yes you were pretty to begin with and you keep on getting prettier! Congrats on all your success and all the obstacles you've overcome.

BEAUTIFUL! YOU LOOK GREAT! CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!!!