When I tell them my hubby and I will be sharing a meal. I'm out of town right now, so we are eating out. What's the deal???? Last night at dinner the server made a comment about me having an anorexia plate (because I only took a little of my hubbys prime rib and veggies). It almost made me feel as if I needed to explain myself, but why should I???? It's not right. Ugh! Anyhoo, thanks for listening

On another note, we are saving soooo much money it's incredible!!! LOL!!! I still can't believe the way I used to eat ...and how America eats.

Today I went for breakfast to a cafe with a friend, had a bowl of natural yogurt with granola and some fresh berries on the top. Ate half of it then asked the waitress to take it away because or else I find myself eating when I'm already full, (my friend was still eating) The waitress looked so upset, she said do you maybe want some milk on top? She thought I didn't like it. I just said no I'm watching my weight and if it's on the table I'll just pick at it! She just smiled

I try to share with my husband as much as I can too but sometimes it's difficult if he fancies something different to me, which is quite often the case. As I can never tell when I am full I tend to undereat so as to avoid being sick but that often leads me to want to snack again later. Last Sunday we went out for a meal with some friends who were paying and my husband wanted burger and fries all to himself so I order the roast dinner thinking that I would easily be able to control how much I ate. As we were being treated to the meal I felt under immense pressure to eat as much as I could and I did end up eating too much despite the plate looking hardly touched! There was an incredible amount of food on the plate, in my eyes, although my friends didn't really seem to think it was out of the ordinary. Anyway, I ended up bringing up some of the meal in the restaurant toilets and then retching violently and bringing up foamy saliva for up to about an hour after the meal. This was into a plastic bag in the car on the way home and all down my jeans as well! It was horrible and quite painful. Next time I will just go with the starter instead of having eyes bigger than my belly. I did have about half a pint of orange juice beforehand as well and I don't think that had had time to go down either so that contributed to it all. Even at over a year out I still don't always get it right!!!

I feel you all! The waitresses keep asking me if everything was ok and eyeing my plate. I just tell them it was wonderful but I just am not that hungry right now (as if I ate recently or something). It seems to passify them lol.

I am aghast at the "anorexia plate" comment. I spent 17 years of my life in the restaurant industry, waiting, bar tending and managing. I can't believe your server would say that...I know any place I worked at would have written me up if not fired me for making a statement like that. A servers function is to bring you what you need and to make your time at their restaurant pleasant. Not to give their commentary on what your eating. Sleeve 4 me, don't be afraid to say something to the server next time if they make a rude comment, you're the one paying their salary (and if I was there that server would have gotten an earful). If you don't feel comfortable doing that you can always discretely ask fro the manager, who I know would have a lot to say about your situation.

I'm really sorry this happened to you sleeve 4 me, but now lets be strong and not let it happen again!

She shouldn't have said that but the reason most servers are annoyed is you are taking up their table, ordering a small amount of food and probably tipping based on your check total. Servers make 2.13 an hour and if you have someone like us who with a partner only eats a little food, then we take a long time to eat, and leave a little tip it can really cut into their bring home pay. You are only given 3-4 tables so each time you turn one you make money and usually the higher the bill the bigger the tip.

How rude sleeve, sorry you had to go through that!

DJackson, thanks for the school tip... however, comments like that would be better served up in the back and not in earshot of the guest. I think people fly out the mouth too much these days, and common courtesy is becoming a thing of the past.

So sad.

No one has been rude to me yet but they do give me weird looks. I ordered a sub at Subway the other day and said I didn't want the bread to just put it in a cup. Now granted I'm in Taiwan and I know my Chinese sucks but I do know how to say "I don't eat bread" and "cup" perfectly. The lady stared at me bewildered on how to put meat in a cup- as if she physically didn't know how to do it. It took 2 of them to put 4 meatballs in a cup with 1 triangle of cheese. It was frustrating at the time but still kind of funny. Luckily we are the only Americans on our block so they know now when I walk in get a cup and don't ask about the bread.

Exactly! He was very nice initially, but was trying too hard to be funny! What if I had a sickness and just couldn't eat? Or what if I was truly struggling with an eating disorder? I just don't think I have to share that I had wls just so they feel better. It's not about them. By the way after he saw how little I ate, he kept pushing the dessert and kept asking if we wanted some chocolate cake to go, what the heck lol...now that was annoying!!!

I got an odd (and almost annoyed look) yesterday at dinner. I just started mushies but my boyfriend wanted a steak so when we went out, I just got a baked potato. The server said "a baked potato annnnd?" And I just looked at him and added "and a fork."

Sometimes I feel like I should explain that I just had surgery but I usually don't. Let them wonder. Just give me my food. LOL

Fleur LOL that was pretty funny.. the whole and a fork thing!!! good one!

my husband and i went out for dinner the other day and im on the mushie stage too... I really didnt want yet another Soup so i ordered the chili that is supposed to go on the nachos and the waitress was a little confused but then i explained that i would like the chili in a bowl without nachos etc. I got my order and when we looked at the bill my chili came to only 2.99!!! Ima cheap date now!! yay!

I always share with my husband now. Or my oldest son. He told us that since I can't get a adult meal he is old enough he can and we can share. I only take a few bites of what ever they get. My dr. gave me a card to give to any staff that seems to question us. But as to the rude remark tell them "bite me". lol not really but its none of there business why you dont want to eat.. And it is a lot cheaper my husband does not order a starter anymore because he does not want to eat that much in front of me. so he is losing weight too.

Sounds like he took an extra dose of rudeness for the day! So far I have avoided any rude servers probably because we usually go eat with our friends who eat *alot* and she tends to be a demanding customer so they probably never even notice me(VBG) Seriously I am amazed too at how much I use to eat my husband and I share a Breakfast that I use to polish off on my own! I also notice over weight people something I never did before.

Nancy

This thread is cracking me up!

I haven't ventured out to a restaurant yet...

That anorexia comment was pretty stupid. What if you actually had anorexia or had someone close to you struggling? That'd be pretty hurtful.

I can now eat enough that it doesn't look TOO weird. Plus my boyfriend polishes off anything that's set in front of him, so I'm always offering him bites of my food so it looks like I ate more than I actually did. I remember getting some weird looks when we first started going out after the surgery, when I could only have a few tablespoons of soup or like 2 pieces of sashimi in one sitting. The only time I got a comment was actually only 3 weeks ago or so. I ordered a humongous salad, but by the time it arrived, already had a slice of my boyfriend's thin crust pizza, so I only ended up taking a few forkfuls of the salad before the evening was over. The server was like "Oh no! Did you not like it!?" I said it was great, but already had some pizza and generally can't eat very much. She exclaimed "That wouldn't be very much fun!" I wanted to say, "TRUST ME, it's a LOT more fun this way!" LOL.