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Food Servers seemed annoyed

When I tell them my hubby and I will be sharing a meal. I'm out of town right now, so we are eating out. What's the deal???? Last night at dinner the server made a comment about me having an anorexia plate (because I only took a little of my hubbys prime rib and veggies). It almost made me feel as if I needed to explain myself, but why should I???? It's not right. Ugh! Anyhoo, thanks for listening :)

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  • LilMissDiva Irene
    LilMissDiva Irene

    How rude sleeve, sorry you had to go through that! DJackson, thanks for the school tip... however, comments like that would be better served up in the back and not in earshot of the guest. I t

  • educationrulz
    educationrulz

    I'm confused as to how someone at a restaurant can force you to order a regular entree as opposed to a kid's meal. Do some restaurants have a food minimum? I've heard of a drink minimum, but not a foo

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MY DOC ALSO GAVE ME A CARD WHEN I HAD THE BAND STATING I HAD BARIATRIC SURG. SO PLEASE ALLOW ME TO ORDER CHILD SIZE PORTIONS, BUT WHO THE HELL WANTS TO DO THAT AND THEN GET STARED AT AND SEE EVERYONE OF THE STAFF WHISPERING AND LOOKING AT YOU....I DID TRY IT ONE TIME AND THEY REFUSED ME. I WAS SOOOOO EMBARRESED I LEFT...:angry:

Wow I just went through that this weekend Im still very new sleeved 9-28-2010. So I went with my freinds to a diner. Everyone was ordering huge meals, after looking for mushy food i can eat i decided to stick to water and pick off my freinds roast beef hash i had a couple of spoon fulls and was done. the waiter came by and said "you didnt order anything....why not?" I was so shocked that he asked me that i was so not prepared to answer. It was as he was offended by me not ordering. I just told him i was not hungry. smh

This is a really good thread...because while everyone might not be so rude as to assume a customer has an eating disorder, I think there are lots of waiters who are "suprised" or "offended" by someone not ordering, or eating enough. I guess I haven't quite prepared myself for this yet. Need to do some thinking.

Oh and I'm going to need one of those cards. I have to go to a pizza buffet place about 10 days post op and I just know there will be nothing for me to eat there. It is for my daughter's final volleyball celebration and my DH will be out of town. :blink: So not sure how I'm going to handle that just yet. Ugh.

So sorry about the rude comments to you! I also have found that waitstaff seem worried about the amount I eat. Here's my new trick....if I order my own meal, I ask for a to go container when the food is served. I put most of the meal in the box and the waitstaff have no idea how much or how little I have eaten!

Wow, that was a rotten thing to say. Totally outta line.

I haven't gotten a single bad comment from waiters. Maybe I'm of the age that I remind them of their mothers. I expected a comment when I went to the chinese buffet and ordered ONE eggroll off the menu--but no, nothing. I always tip well because I was a waitress in college and I know it's hard work.

It turns out that one of my friends gives me crap about what I do or do not eat. I will have to mention it to her.

MY DOC ALSO GAVE ME A CARD WHEN I HAD THE BAND STATING I HAD BARIATRIC SURG. SO PLEASE ALLOW ME TO ORDER CHILD SIZE PORTIONS, BUT WHO THE HELL WANTS TO DO THAT AND THEN GET STARED AT AND SEE EVERYONE OF THE STAFF WHISPERING AND LOOKING AT YOU....I DID TRY IT ONE TIME AND THEY REFUSED ME. I WAS SOOOOO EMBARRESED I LEFT...:angry:

Yeah, I feel you. I've seen those, but have no desire to broadcast my surgery to random people with potentially no benefit.

  • Author

Yeah, I feel you. I've seen those, but have no desire to broadcast my surgery to random people with potentially no benefit.

WOW BBJ! You are doing awesome!!! Only 25 lbs. to go to goooooal! Way to go :)!

I'm confused as to how someone at a restaurant can force you to order a regular entree as opposed to a kid's meal. Do some restaurants have a food minimum? I've heard of a drink minimum, but not a food minimum. I guess I haven't dealt with this because I've been ordering from the appetizer menu unless my daughter's with me and I get her a kid's plate.

I order kid's meals for myself all the time as takeout. I guess I need to try the kid meal thing the next time I'm at a sit down restaurant. I don't like the idea of telling total strangers why I"m ordering a small meal, but if pressed I will call for the manager and insist that I be allowed to order what I choose to order. If the manager gives me problems I'll tell him/her that I have a stomach disorder and if I eat too much I'll end up in ICU and have to call my attorney. That'll probably shut them the hell up! :sneaky2:

Yeah they do if you read it will say kids 12 and under or something like that. When I was a server I had a few people just say they had WLS and wanted to order off the kiddie menu and I always let them. If my manager would have come by or take the food to the table I would have probably gotten into trouble but oh well. I'd just order off the kids menu (unless it's buffett) and then if they refuse speak to the mgr it's probably the mgr that is keeping them from allowing you to anyway.

  • Author

I'm confused as to how someone at a restaurant can force you to order a regular entree as opposed to a kid's meal. Do some restaurants have a food minimum? I've heard of a drink minimum, but not a food minimum. I guess I haven't dealt with this because I've been ordering from the appetizer menu unless my daughter's with me and I get her a kid's plate.

I order kid's meals for myself all the time as takeout. I guess I need to try the kid meal thing the next time I'm at a sit down restaurant. I don't like the idea of telling total strangers why I"m ordering a small meal, but if pressed I will call for the manager and insist that I be allowed to order what I choose to order. If the manager gives me problems I'll tell him/her that I have a stomach disorder and if I eat too much I'll end up in ICU and have to call my attorney. That'll probably shut them the hell up! :sneaky2:

Hahahahahahahah! Funny!

Firstly, that comment is totally rude. I can't even believe it. While I understand DJackson's comment about the servers low pay/table space etc, we all have the right to eat in a restaurant. Their job is to take good care of us while we are there. As long as we are being polite to them and not lingering there forever, they don't really have a right to be annoyed. I'm a standard 20% tipper, so the tip is still decent when hubby and I split a meal, and we eat quickly and leave. Not only that, but post ops are not the only people splitting meals. MANY people are splitting meals these days due to the economy. Or skipping ordering drinks or dessert to save money. While I know people sometimes also skimp on tipping to try to save money - and I think thats wrong - there is nothing wrong with splitting meals.

Under ANY circumstance, there's no excuse for making a comment like that to a guest whether you are annoyed or not.

I am happy to say no server has seemed annoyed by us splitting a meal. We haven't had any bad serving experiences yet, just funny/odd ones compared to before. Every server seems shocked that I don't want anything at all to drink - no not even Water - and they usually keep asking throughout the meal if I am still ok without a drink. I don't mind this, they are just trying to make sure I'm taken care of... but it's funny. My hubby just gets a water so they don't keep asking them, lol. I have definitely had the "was something wrong with your meal?" comments, but again they are just trying to do a good job and make sure I'm ok so that's fine!

I actually had a lot more rude server experiences BEFORE surgery! Maybe, in retrospect, they were rude to me because of my size. I never thought that at the time, but I really haven't had any bad experiences like that lately. Hmm, food for thought?

I haven't been sleeved yet but I seriously don't know if I'll be able to say anything nice back if someone said that to me! LOL

Shoot, since I started this process I've been trying to think about food different and really SEE the amounts I am eating. Tonight we went to a diner and I ordered an open face roast beef sandwich, OMG It was SO HUGE It came out on TWO Plates!! I couldn't believe that I really might have ate most of it before and even now I ate a lot more of it then I will after surgery I'm sure!

I printed off the cards from an site and I'm going to ask my Doc to sign them!! It'll be interesting to eat out after surgery since DH is having surgery about 2 weeks after me! The whole family will be able to eat off one plate! YAY!!

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