Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

getting banded excited & scared and not sure how to tell family and friends



Recommended Posts

I have decided to get banded will send my paper work in for approval next week after my next drs visit. Hoping to be banded in July 2013.I have so many mixed emotions I am super excited and hope this tool will give me the weight loss success I so desire. Despite how excited I am I am scared to death. I haven't even told my best friend that I am doing it. I am afraid of the reaction kinda like I am a failure for getting banded but despite my best weight loss attempts in the past 5 years I lost and gained the same 10 pounds about 20 times. I feel like I have so many questions about being banded and yet I can't think of one to ask. I guess tell me all that you think I should know the good and the bad. Thank you

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know i was to excited to even care what people thought about it.. i did tell everyone and surprisingly they were all supportive.. even tho i heard you dont need that your great just the way you are.. i started it each time with " So i have some exciting news for me" good luck in sharing the news!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am going through the same thing right now ! I am getting banded around September and have only told a few people. The reason being is that being banded isn't an "easy way out" and I don't think people that aren't overweight will ever understand that because they're not educated enough about it. I say do whatever you feel is right. I think I'm going to be more open about it AFTER surgery. I just don't need any negative comments or opinions before surgery, although I think we banders may think of it more in depth than non banders. Friends and family only want the best for us ! Sorry if this was NO help at all - just thought I'd share. Good luck let me know what you decide !

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Buy a book about lapband surgery, On the Bandwagon, or the one advertised here and read it cover to cover. Go to the presurgery forums and start there and progress your way through. Best advise is learn as much as possible before the surgery. Does your doctor offer seminars? If so, GO!

Good luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am so excited about getting it done, that I tell everyone, lol. Just realize, you need to do this for you, not anyone else. Some are going to understand and others won't. I am grown and don't need anyones permission, lol. Although I have gotten alot of support, there are some who think I can do it on my own without it. My mom even said that all I have to do is stop eating. Thanks Mom, never thought about that!

I have wanted to do this for years and have done alot of research, but even when I met with my Dr. I realized I did not remember everything I wanted to ask, so I would write it down to ask at the next visit. Also, my band coordn.lets me email her all the time.

Good luck!

Ps. The more I talk about the lapband, the better I feel, and the more support I get, don't be afraid to share.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you everyone. After I posted here I bought the book on line. I did ask the surgeon questions. And I'm going to the hospitals monthly support group starting this month and I joined here to look and read aka listen as well. I know my friends will be supportive my family has been super supportive everyone wants to come to the surgery and hold my hand lol I am blessed. Like some of you said this band is not the easy way out as other people think. I think the band is a tool. Hell of I could do it on my own I would !!!'I lost substantial weight 50 lbs a pop several times but I always regained plus some and that's why I am At highest weight now. My fear for telling my others is perhaps their reaction of why I didn't tell them sooner but I know they will be supportive . I am glad I found this site thank you all again.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told people on a need to know only, which is about five people , my husband is super supportive but the rest of my family not so much, tell who you think will offer you the support you need

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I choose to only tell my boyfriend (that i live with and who is my primary support) and my best friend who lives five states away. I did not tell coworkers because i didn't want the scrutiny of bring asked all the time how much weight i had lost or having everything i ate scrutinized. I didn't even tell my dad. As far as anyone is concerned, i had my gallbladder out. The scars are almost identical and the time off work is the same so it was easy to hide.

However you will have to decide who to tell and not tell.

I just didn't feel it necessary to tell everybody.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am still getting everything in order so my doctors office can send my paperwork off to be approved by insurance. I too plan to tell everyone AFTER the surgery. I think most people would be supportive but I don't want any negative comments and or uneducated opinions ;) Good luck!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks everyone . I guess a part of me is afraid of being seen as a failure cause I couldn't do it with the band. My cousin lost 135lbs in one year all on her own no surgery and well I can't. I do have supportive friends n family it's my issue not theirs. I'm not telling coworkers cause the are the last people to tell anything to! I will be off of work for the summer so I figure ill just tell them diet n exercise is what happened and that won't be a lie!!! I'm super excited about the band and pray insurance will approve it and to be banded by mid July :) so I can get into my new routine before school starts again in the fall. Again thank you you have been great I think this site is a great find and resource

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Whether you tell anyone is a personal choice. I'm a blabber and tell everyone! The upside is by telling others you might be offering the encouragement they need to get one too! Just thimk of yourself as a public service lol. I completely understand not wanting to report to coworkers or feel like someone is judging your every bite. Sometimes, while I hate it, it can be a good thing. I do think reading the lapband book is GREAT advice. Some interest things I have read: that anti inflammatory drugs like aspirin can erode the band. That you will not be able to burp. That you should not have solid food for first 3 wks after band, that one meal is 20 small bites. Chew for 20 seconds and wait a full minute between bites. Its the 20-20-20 rule . 20 bites, 20seconds, take 20 minutes to eat. My lapband place gave me a book to read.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm getting banded in Aug and im very scared / happy. I know i need this i want to live a long health life im just scared something will go wrong .

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Angiekate I felt the same way but doing nothing can cause bad things too:( one day it clicked and I felt nothing bad could happen. I have been reading the big lapband book n forums on here and found them helpful :) we are in this together good luck

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×