Learn From My $16,000 Mistake

[Sojourner 2,446]

The band is a highly self-empowering weight loss tool...you will determine the level of your success, or lack of success with weight loss and your band by the choices you make every day.

Each of us has a responsibility to ourselves to become educated about this tool, how to use the band, and understand the limitations of the band.

I find it difficult to be sympathetic towards someone who has not been responsible with their band, and/or who has not been proactive to resolve the medical issues they may have encountered along their journey.

This journey is definitely not a "one size fits all"...but I sincerely believe that the results we achieve will be directly related to the effort we put forth to be successful.

IMHO...other's mileage may vary.

[sparkplug 106]

I too, am so happy with my band. I have to admit that the 3 times I have gotten stuck I wanted to die and wondered why I was so foolish to get the band. But that passes and like everybody else has said repeatedly, you will learn that you CANNOT eat one more bite. You need to control what you eat and how much and the band is only there to guide you, not to stop you! You have to take responsibility for your actions and change your mindset to make the change to a skinny person who eats very little. I can't imagine eating until I throw up???? I have a small dish and small bowl used for my meals only and put just enough to satisfy my hunger and walk away from the table. If I feel full before finishing, I walk away from the table and start doing dishes while my husband is still eating. It is a whole new world and it does not change overnight, it takes time and you need to learn from your mistakes. I know there are people that this does not work for because they thought it was a quick fix. Wrong! I have met 2 other people banded and one is slowly gaining back her 140 pounds ( even with a fill) and the other one who gained most of her weight back has gotten back to basics and is getting it off slowly but surely. It is trial and error for her and I have done my best to encourage her that it is all a mindset and how bad you want to get it off and keep it off. Good luck whatever you do, but this is something you will have to monitor your whole life and I am okay with that.

[Nette Fosters 41]

MY STORY ISN'T OVER YET, IS YOURS?

I read what you shared and I understood what you were saying- I've thought similar thoughts over the years.

I won't tell you to "snap out of it" because that never worked when people said it to me. But when I was ready, when I felt sufficient motivation to make my own health my priority, I did snap out of my "hmm...the band didn't work" bad attitude and I followed the rules even though I thought some of them were stupid. And I've started losing weight again after years of not losing and even gaining.

If someone had judged my success when I'd already been banded for years and yet I weighed 200 pounds, they might say it was a failure. But once I ramped up my movement the scale started moving again. (In the past two weeks I've lost six pounds.) decided to try slow jogging (thanks to "Couch to 5K") and an hour of Wii aerobics instead of my usual slow stroll through the neighborhood that counted as my exercise before. And I started logging my food on "Lost It!" and learning about nutrition. And I stopped making restaurant lunches and dinners my main form of socializing with friends.

You're so right! Eating in a restaurant isn't the same anymore, it can turn into a gurgling, slime-flowing puke-fest at its worst. (Whenever I fly on a plane, I bring home a few "air-sickness" bags to tuck in my purse for emergency band situations. And strong zip lock baggies tucked in a purse work in emergencies too.) I felt embarrassed asking for my husband to pull the car over because I ate a few bites too many and was about to throw it all up. It's gross, isn't it? But I'd rather excuse myself and go PB in the bathroom than stay morbidly obese and eventually die from a heart attack, stroke, asthma, diabetes, you name it. I don't want to have to test my blood and give myself insulin shots. Drops of blood here and there, insulin vials in the fridge, a "sharps" disposal box on the bathroom counter... That's kinda yucky. And out of control diabetes leads to blindness and amputations. Also kinda...yucky. Having an oxygen tube under my nose all the time and carting around a little personal oxygen tank due to heart failure....there are all sorts of indignities and humiliations that come from long term morbid obesity. If I have a choice I'll choose an occasional PB that reminds me to listen to my body and not always try to take just "one more bite."

Being healthy is my priority now so if I'm meeting a friend nowadays I'm focusing on talking with my friend and not making the visit about the restaurant food we eat. I'm more likely to invite a friend to sit and talk while sipping a coffee or iced tea at a cafe than a restaurant. Or I invite a friend to walk or shop with me. Now that I'm trying healthier coping skills when life is hard (talking about what made me upset instead soothing me feelings with food) I'm losing weight.

I know I sound like I'm lecturing. I'm sorry, that's not my intent. But I relate to you and I went years feeling the same way you did. And after a while, enough of life's little "lessons" finally snapped me out of my bad attitude (going back on blood pressure medicine after being able to go off, hearing about friends and family's preventable health issues and the impact they had, struggling to communicate with a person I love who was paralyzed from a stroke, etc.)

A few years ago, my band story looked like it ended poorly. But it hadn't yet ended. Every day I get to choose the thoughts and actions that are resulting in me now authoring the future I'd prefer.

I'm not perfect. And on some days my attitude sucks. But I'm not giving up on myself. I'm going to follow the rules, work harder, change old behaviors and learn new skills. None of that is my natural style but I know where following my natural style has led me and where it will eventually lead. I'm choosing to work towards health instead.

Wherever you started, wherever you're at now, wherever you're heading, I wish you blessings and health and happiness. I hope you find what works well for you.

[k8tbug 1]

Liz,

I am truly sorry for your struggles and i know exactly how you feel. I was banded 3 days before Christmas of 09. I had lost 34lb then slowly gained it back. I too had problems with Protein, but in my case i failed to seek my doc for the assistance i needed. Then once i learned what foods i could get down easily so that i might feel that "full" feeling i was told id never feel again, i used them every time i was stressed or sad. I realized all i was doing was fighting my band. I need a band for my head not my stomach. I am having my band removed. I wasn't prepared. I am going back to good ol diet and exercise, as well as therapy to help me figure out why i use food the way i do and what triggers me. I applaud all of you who have had success, i know it has not been easy. Liz, you have to find what works for you regardless of what others say. Take care.

[BayougirlMrsS 3,933]

Nette.... What a great post...

I have to say that i have noticed a large influx of people saying that their band is not working for them... All i have to say is why are you depending on the "band" to do all the work?

My personal observation is MOST of the people that went down in OLD MEXICO are having most of the problems. My sister in law is/was one of them in 2007. She had her band one year and only lost 20lbs. She had her band re-done in the states and guess what..... she still failed... why you ask?... because all she eats are the "slider" foods. My brother comes home and in the trash is a empty 1/2 gallon blue bell container.... empty candy wrappers ... Her and my brother don't visit me together because she says it makes her uncomfortable to be around me when he is there because he points out my success and it makes her upset. Grant you my brother should not do that, but, now we don't do family functions together anymore because she didn't follow the rules and do what she needed to do. Fast forward to two week ago... she had her band removed and had gastric bypass.... We shall see how that works out for her...

When i asked her about her pre counselling and pre dietary and psychological visits...... she said she had NONE of that... She call the dr. , made appt. , had surgery with a 4cc band and left mexico never to return.

HELLO.... PEOPLE..... do you think this could maybe a cause..... you think!!! REMEMBER THE OLD SAYING...... YOU GET WHAT YOU PAY FOR...

[mimi81082 27]

Hey Liz, I just read another post by Missy1966...almost IDENTICAL to your story. Someone said that you had your surgery in mexico? Well, so did Missy1966. maybe you could contact her and compare stories. Maybe this is a regional or doctor issue more so than a band issue? Just thought that might be helpful for you!

[MiniMi 1,468]

So interesting! This thread has really helped my resolve to follow my plan to a T, consult my doctor and team regularly, and to focus on being a better me. There cannot be a blame game in my failure with the band. I do not attribute my success to the band nor am I ready to have a failure. If someone asks me about my wl I say " I'm eating healthier and exercising more".

There HAS to come a point in my life where I don't blame anyone or anything for my failures. I can tell you all why ww didn't work, Why I kept myself in a fat suit for years. They are really good reasons. Guaranteed to shed a tear. But those excuses make me powerless and I'm tired of being a victim. But most of all I'm tired of being a victim of myself.

I will stand up and fight for me and my right to be the person that I was meant to be.....finally!

(Banded 10/5 lost 30lbs)

Michele???ƒ

[BayougirlMrsS 3,933]

I think some of you guys are being a little too harsh with Liz1531. Reading her post, she is obviously very unhappy and frustrated after 5 years into her lap band surgery. I have recently began to look into lap band surgery and want to read all the negative as well as positive information I can find. So, thank you Liz and hope that you find a solution to your problem.

I don't think anyone was too Harsh on Liz.... She said her self that she lost 20lbs in the first month for doing what.... EATING LESSSSS.... then didn't lose any more because why..... EATING JUNK!! Hello, did eating junk help you lose weight with out the band...? So how do you expect to lose weight if all you eat is slider food..... if you can eat that, you can eat food that is better for you.

And if you chose to go down to Mexico and pay out of pocket for the LB then you could have found someone in the state to do it with that as a down payment and finance the rest....

[sparkplug 106]

Liz, first of all, I would never consider going to another country like Mexico to have surgery of any kind. I have friends who had disasterous dental surgery down there and now I see the result of the lap bands from there and I want to cringe. Secondly, I agree with the above post I let my band tell me what to eat and how much. bread and sugar are definitely no no's. I try to eat mostly Protein and occasionally veggies when cooked real well. I have no fills and still occasionally get stuck from my own error of eating too fast or too big of a piece. I was not prepared for the band when they scheduled my surgery. I had researched gastric bypass and my insurance would not cover it because I did not need to lose 100 or more pounds so the doctor gave me the one option left which was the lap band. I was so desperate to lose this weight and KEEP IT OFF. I lost it a million times over but it kept coming back and even with the band I have to keep guard on what I eat and it is so easy to get carried away. I am so sorry it did not work for you but I see it is so different for everyone on here. I never had any fills and have no Fluid in my band and am to goal and yet I read how people are getting filled every other month and still having trouble losing weight. It works so different for all of us and nobody should condemn you for your thoughts on this. Everyone of us has a different view but like I said I would never go outside of the United States for any surgery on my body even if it was for free. I hope you get better and can get to goal whatever way you end up going. Good luck and keep happy.

[Blueiz 17]

Sorry you had complications, but it is the best decision i ever made. You can talk bad about it all you want to, it is your opinion and your right. I have lost 125 lbs, and i don't have one complaint about it. That is my opinion.