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I Don't Want This Lap Band......



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I thought for over a year about getting lap band. I finally went through with it...paid 10 grand out of pocket, and now I don't want it. I see my husband and son eating whatever they please, and I can't. I saw them eating burgers today and I broke down crying and locked myself in the bathroom. Is being thin really worth this crap???

I just don't want it anymore.... :(

I am supposed to be happy about this life change, but all I feel is depression....

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BreBre, Please hang in there. Someday you will be able to eat hamburgers again. You just won't want to eat as much. Give it some time and follow the band rules and you will be sooo very happy. Hugs!!!!

BTW- I am sure I will be saying the same thing two weeks from now, once I am banded :)

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Think I read in another post that you are only about eight days post-op. Just think of all the medications running through your body at the moment, of the trauma your body has been through, of the major life changes you are facing - and have suddenly just confronted the reality of.

No matter how much preparation and research you do, it's all theoretical until you are there.

Hang in there, you will get stronger as the days, weeks and months pass and the lbs drop off.

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once you start eating foods again, things will be much better. this is bandster hell, having to eat mushy, soft foods while everyone else pigs out on whatever is hard. but think of it like this, they are eating huge quantities of food and now you won't be, therefore you will be losing weight. don't give up! you are still really new! it will get better.

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The depression is more likely grieving for the foods you are craving, especially comfort foods. Try to focus on the reasons you got the band. Sooner than you realize, you will be able to eat most foods again, just in a healthier portion size. Even now, I look at my husband's plate when he is eating and I think "gosh, how can he eat so much". I look at my plate and I think "I'm proud that I only need to eat this much". I really see now how unhealthy I was eating. Even if I ate healthy, I ate way too much so in essence it was not a healthy dinner. I save so much money now too! My weight continues to drop each week and that has been my motivation to keep with it. Once you heal more and are able to get your fills in your band and see the weight loss, its a big motivator!

We've all been through the doubts. You are not alone. You will get past it! You WILL be healthy!

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BreBre, I feel your pain, I just had surgery on June 13 and I keep asking myself why did I do this to myself. From every post I have read though it seems to get better, I have been craving something that I can chew on every minute of every day. Its horrible. And I totally feel the same way. I am also self pay so it makes if even tougher that I poured all that money into this and now I feel such regret. Besides thinking that it will get better, we have nothing else. Just hold on to the hope that it gets better. Thats all we can do.

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The depression is more likely grieving for the foods you are craving, especially comfort foods. Try to focus on the reasons you got the band. Sooner than you realize, you will be able to eat most foods again, just in a healthier portion size. Even now, I look at my husband's plate when he is eating and I think "gosh, how can he eat so much". I look at my plate and I think "I'm proud that I only need to eat this much". I really see now how unhealthy I was eating. Even if I ate healthy, I ate way too much so in essence it was not a healthy dinner. I save so much money now too! My weight continues to drop each week and that has been my motivation to keep with it. Once you heal more and are able to get your fills in your band and see the weight loss, its a big motivator!

We've all been through the doubts. You are not alone. You will get past it! You WILL be healthy!

BreBre... I agree with every post in reply here. I think that nearly everyone has gone through an emotional 'trauma' after being banded. Usually it happens soon after. There are so many bodily changes, hormonal ones as well... and lifestyle changes going on that its overwhelming and the way you feel is perfectly natural . Believe me when i say this...... eventually, not too long in the future, you will have levelled out a lot, you will feel better about having the procedure done, and whats more you will see weight loss. Its the most wonderful feeling in the world to know that the weight is coming off at long last. Now when i sit down to eat i am proud that i can live perfectly well and happily on the small portion that ive served myself. Believe me, im not missing out on any foods that i love. i just eat in much smaller portions. I went to the wardrobe yesterday and got a pair of jeans out that i hadnt worn in over five years. i thought i would air them out, try them on this morning. when i tried them on, they were WAY TOO BIG.. how thrilling this was. Ive got some beautiful clothes in my wardrobe that ive hung onto and now i know i can start wearing them again.

NOTHING TASTES AS GOOD AS BEING THIN FEELS .. !!This is a powerful statement, believe me. Im three months post banded on the 20 june. ive lost about 30 pounds. both my husband and myself are so thrilled with whats happening. i get my second fill this coming wednesday. when i dish up the huge meals for my two men now i dont know how i ever managed to eat nearly as much. i did at one point. No wonder i felt ill all the time. Now? i can see the world of different that the band has made to my eating habits as well as the size of my meal. i wish i could impart the wisdom of my new way of eating to my family. i know they would be far better off if they adopted it, but no way. Just as it was no way for me beforehand.

i hope this encourages you. You arent walking down a road that we havent already trodden. We have all been down it.... give your body time to heal.... be patient.. and know that in time it wont affect you as much when you see what the rest of the family are eating. It doesnt worry me at all. And, whats more, if i badly want some, i will have a tiny bit. thats all. no big deal. Im really happy with my results so far. I know you will be. Hang on and have some faith. hugs for you. judy

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Dear Brebre,

I,also, don't want this band! I need this band! Without it I am a 255 lb woman wearing size 22-24 dresses or bottoms, and 3x tops. I looked like someone's grandma, which I am. But, with it, I am wearinga size 8, and my husband called me his trophy wife the other day! My grandson saw an older picture of me, and asked who that was, he did not know the "fat" lady in the picture! Without the lapband, I can't ride the rides at the amusement parks that I go to with my grands, and I can't comfortably sit in movie seats, plane seat, etc.

I tried Weightwatchers, it was okay, I lost 20% of my weight. But, took a vacation, and since I did not have a band, gained 20 lbs in 3 weeks. Boohoo. I am NOT a good dieter, I need the help of restriction because I don't have the discipline to stay on a diet long enough to loose the weight I needed to. For me, it is and was the only thing!! I don't like the band, I love the band and need the band to survive, and most of the people on here are like that. Stay strong, soon you will be able to eat hamburgers, if you want, I don't eat them, no appetite for them. They do look yummy, but it is not anything I want anymore. I got banded Oct 30, 2009. I am 63 years old and happier than I have been in many, many years! Good luck, and best wishes for your future as you journey bandland! Karen

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Dear BreBre, please be encouraged. We have all been down that road. But we all got passed it. Give it time. This to shall pass. NO food taste as good as me looking good, feeling good and being healthy.

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Everyone has said what I would have and more. Try to saty focused on your weight loss journey. Don't worry...It gets better (I did it TWICE) and if it doesn't, there are people who will help you.

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My grandson saw an older picture of me, and asked who that was, he did not know the "fat" lady in the picture!

WHAT A MOTIVATION!!!

I'm 7 days pre-op. My surgeon requires 2wks Atkins for pre-op diet. My husband and I went to a movie last night. I got a Water and a hotdog, threw away the bun. He got popcorn, nachos, and a cherry coke. Part of me wanted a little popcorn, but I knew if I had some, I'd want a LOT and I don't want to take the chance of something going wrong in the operating room. Watching him eat all of that in one sitting, I was proud of myself more than the feeling of loss!! It felt good!

We're planning to go see Brave after surgery next Friday. I wonder what my movie-food experience will be then, when I can only have liquids...

Thanks for sharing, Brebre. I'm going to be more aware of my feelings and fight them post-op. Good luck to you and God bless!

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Been there. It will get better. You are going through the mental crap. Its no fun but it will pass.

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Bre Bre...I hope your already feeling better about your band....Reading everyones post to you and have to agree with each one....We all have days we feel discouraged...but it passes and the good days feel SOOOO good.....

Hang in there and keep us posted....

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I thought for over a year about getting lap band. I finally went through with it...paid 10 grand out of pocket, and now I don't want it. I see my husband and son eating whatever they please, and I can't. I saw them eating burgers today and I broke down crying and locked myself in the bathroom. Is being thin really worth this crap???

I just don't want it anymore.... :(

I am supposed to be happy about this life change, but all I feel is depression....

Everyone has shared sound information and insights with you, and really covered the topic well...

It's important to recognize that you are still in the process of making major life adjustments. You realize that your relationship with food must change, so your are mourning the loss of that relationship. Totally normal and to be expected. The changes you are involved with are both emotional and physical. Your hormones are raging, and that does not help with maintaining a positive outlook either. Depression is not a rare response to the adjustment. If your down feelings persist, it would be helpful to tell you surgeon and perhaps also to speak with a therapist.

There are few others who don't have the post op questions you mentioned about "Why did I do this? What was I thinking?". I know I did...

As others have mentioned, the initial post op time can be difficult when there is a family to continue to care for. Please know that at some point in the future, you will be able to have small amounts of the foods you crave, though you will not want much of them. If that sounds impossible to believe, I understand that. But you simply cannot eat larger portions. and though it may be difficult to believe, you won't want to. It may be helpful for someone else in the family to do the cooking and serving, and eat at different times from when your meals are.

It does get easier...again, it may be difficult for you to believe this, but if so many others are sharing the same message, there must be some truth in it!

Get back in touch with the reasons you opted for the surgery...what were your goals? Refocus yourself on a healthier you...and the rest, along with the lifestyle adjustments will follow.

There is a huge amount of emotional support on this forum, along with many ideas for assisting one through the adjustments needed for success.

Take a day at a time...best wishes to you!

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I think one of the reasons that most insurance companies require a psych consult is to make sure the person having lap-band surgery knows what they are in for. No one says being banded is easy, but most of us agree that it is worth it! I went clothes shopping yesterday for the first time since being banded on 1/31/12 (Up until yesterday I have been shopping in my own closet) and have dropped two sizes!!

Do I want to dig into a big slice of pizza? YES! Can I eat a big slice of pizza? No - Thank you Mr. Band!!!!!

I think kll724 put it best when she said this wasn't something she wanted; it's something she needs. I feel exactly the same way!

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