After researching LB for 2 months, I finally registered for a seminar that was last night. I was so scared I was shaking on the drive there. After getting lost in the building, I finally saw a registration desk and as I walked up I noticed that I knew one of the girls at the registration desk...This was my WORST nightmare realized! I was concocting stories in my head of what I was going to tell my family and friends when I got the surgery and finally convinced myself to go to a seminar. The worst part is that the girl is a friend's girlfriend that is a judgemental gossip along with her friends. It is the WORST possible person I could run into! I was doing all I could not to cry sitting there listening to the doc--thank GOD my husband was there for support. Now that it is the next day and I am trying to adjust my thinking that it's OK for everyone to know. On one hand, I am a horrible liar and am happy I don't have to keep this from anyone. On the other hand, I am a very private person and don't want people to judge me for my choice. I am still trying not to be upset and even reached out to the girl to ask her if she likes the docs she works for--maybe she will take my surgery seriously and not be judgemental--but how do I (suddenly and without a choice) accept that everyone I DIDN'T want to know, will know?

If she works for the dr she cannt tell anyone it is a pt confidentiality she isn't allowed to tell anyone. This doesn't mean she won't but she could loose her job and license if that is the case. It is very serious.

If she tells anyone you can sue the practice.

I was banded this feb and to this day only my mom knows. People can tell I'm losing weight, but they also see the better food choices I'm making and that I talk about going to the gym. Part of me feels silly for keeping this secret, but I too am a very private person. You'll know when you're ready to share. Good luck in this journey! My prayers are with you!

I know for me I am very proud to say I've had the LB done and have taken control of my life!! You shouldn't be ashamed and if you are I'd think your not ready for the band.

I didn't tell most people about my surgery until a couple days after, only if it came up. I still have friends that have no idea I have it done, and a lot of my family doesn't know either. My immediate family knows and my boyfriends family knows but that's about it. I didn't even tell.them until 2 days before surgery....for the same reasons you didn't want to tell anyone - I didn't want to hear peoples judgemental remarks like "why don't you do it the 'natural' way" or "surgery is so extreme, don't do it"

I was set in my ways and didn't want to hear anything different from anyone else. Best of luck to you.

-Melissa M.

Just because she doesn't want people to know doesn't mean she isn't ready for the surgery.

When I first started the process, I felt the exact same way. I was ashamed and embarrassed because I felt like I had failed at weight loss. My husband had just finished losing over 100 pounds through diet and exercise and I felt like an utter and complete failure. Even though, I knew if I wanted to be healthy. When I admitted that WLS could help me with this, I broke down and cried. I needed to do something drastic and with my husband's complete support I went to the meeting.

Now, 8 months later and 10 days post-op, EVERYBODY knows, lol! Not only that, I have not run into anyone who has made me feel bad or ashamed about it!

Just because she doesn't want people to know doesn't mean she isn't ready for the surgery.

When I first started the process, I felt the exact same way. I was ashamed and embarrassed because I felt like I had failed at weight loss. My husband had just finished losing over 100 pounds through diet and exercise and I felt like an utter and complete failure. Even though, I knew if I wanted to be healthy. When I admitted that WLS could help me with this, I broke down and cried. I needed to do something drastic and with my husband's complete support I went to the meeting.

Now, 8 months later and 10 days post-op, EVERYBODY knows, lol! Not only that, I have not run into anyone who has made me feel bad or ashamed about it!

You are amazing! And your husband is amazing to have lost 100 lbs without surgery, but he is in back of you and pushing you forward with your wls ans now toward your new good health. Best wishes to you both!!!Karen