If you think this board is bad.......

[Dave_NW 92]

It just happens that I was there the night that Dave is referring to. Now, let me explain something. Yes, this is a chat room for discussing lapband. It is also a support group for many of us. Many of the regulars talk for several hours daily. If all we ever talked about was the band, it would get pretty boring for all of us quickly. We are all adults and thus, yes, sometimes even sexual questions get asked. We answer those just as well as we answer band questions. If someone needs support in any area, we try to be that support. Your accusation that is nothing more than a porn fest is completely ridiculous. As far as anyone attacking you, that is also ridiculous. We kept trying to tell you that you were posting in the room...that we could see everything that YOU were saying about us. YOU were the one who started tossing insults that you did not mean for us to see. YOU thought they were being said privately which shows you had no spine to say it to us directly and were instead resorting to gossip. YOU kept doing it even after we had told you that we could see it. I was the one who finally posted your pm that we were all seeing in the room back to you so you would finally understand that we were seeing it. ATTACKING YOU? That is hilarious. Instead, I was trying to show you that you were not understanding how to work private chat in the room. The others responded to the crude things you were saying about us. Let me add, this happened MONTHS ago and you are still hanging on to it? REALLY? All I can say is that I am personally sorry that you did not have the intelligence to work chat right so you could insult us without us seeing it. I am sorry that you got your feelings hurt even though you were the one who starting making insults. I am sorry that obviously this traumatized you so badly that you are still talking about it months later. I am sorry that you have such soft feelings that you could not handle someone trying to show you that you were messing up. Have a great day!!!! I won't hold my breath waiting for an apology for the things you said about us. BTW, had you waited around a few minutes, the entire conversation changed...just as it does anytime anyone has a question or a need. The regulars in this room are friends and we support one another through ANYTHING. We don't whine everytime someone doesn't pay specific attention to us.

I appreciate you posting, but I think you may be misremembering how it went. I made ONE statement to the other guy in the room about being tired of all the sex talk, and everyone went off on me. I am not one to insult ANYONE, online or in person. It is absolutely not my style. If insults were being posted in the chat room, they were most definitely NOT posted by me. I don't DO that. After several minutes of the harrassment I received, I made one final post, which was, "Okay Ladies, you can have your fun." And I left the room. I have not been back since. If you truly remember something negative happening, it was after I left the room. Maybe it was the other guy. He was still there when I left.

In my earlier post I was not accusing anyone of making it a porn site. I was referring to the explicit chat happening at that time, and how I felt it was inappropriate. True, I don't go into chat rooms as a rule, but I am certainly intelligent enough to have an idea how they work, or I wouldn't have gone in there. In that case, I did think I was making a private comment to the other guy. Sorry, obviously I was in error. I quickly figured that out when it was pointed out that my post had been seen by others. But I also didn't ask to be openly humiliated by everyone who felt it was acceptable to make fun of my error. I didn't post anything else, waiting for the assault to end. But when the hostility continued, without me saying ANYTHING more, I realized that was not the place I needed to be. So I left. It was made very clear to me that I was not welcome there.

The greater point that it happened AT ALL points out the problem with unmoderated chat rooms. My bringing it up on this thread was in response to the OP saying she encountered similar treatment on another forum. Prior to this thread, I haven't brought this event up to anyone, and it happened last Fall. So obviously I wasn't that traumatized by what happened. I just happen to think it was uncalled for. Just as I think your several insults to me in your post here are uncalled for. Anyone reading what you've said here can easily see the open hostility in what you said about me. It pretty well supports my memories of what happened in the chat room that night. Thanks for helping me out.

Dave

[Pippy1973 3]

I appreciate you posting, but I think you may be misremembering how it went. I made ONE statement to the other guy in the room about being tired of all the sex talk, and everyone went off on me. I am not one to insult ANYONE, online or in person. It is absolutely not my style. If insults were being posted in the chat room, they were most definitely NOT posted by me. I don't DO that. After several minutes of the harrassment I received, I made one final post, which was, "Okay Ladies, you can have your fun." And I left the room. I have not been back since. If you truly remember something negative happening, it was after I left the room. Maybe it was the other guy. He was still there when I left.

In my earlier post I was not accusing anyone of making it a porn site. I was referring to the explicit chat happening at that time, and how I felt it was inappropriate. True, I don't go into chat rooms as a rule, but I am certainly intelligent enough to have an idea how they work, or I wouldn't have gone in there. In that case, I did think I was making a private comment to the other guy. Sorry, obviously I was in error. I quickly figured that out when it was pointed out that my post had been seen by others. But I also didn't ask to be openly humiliated by everyone who felt it was acceptable to make fun of my error. I didn't post anything else, waiting for the assault to end. But when the hostility continued, without me saying ANYTHING more, I realized that was not the place I needed to be. So I left. It was made very clear to me that I was not welcome there.

The greater point that it happened AT ALL points out the problem with unmoderated chat rooms. My bringing it up on this thread was in response to the OP saying she encountered similar treatment on another forum. Prior to this thread, I haven't brought this event up to anyone, and it happened last Fall. So obviously I wasn't that traumatized by what happened. I just happen to think it was uncalled for. Just as I think your several insults to me in your post here are uncalled for. Anyone reading what you've said here can easily see the open hostility in what you said about me. It pretty well supports my memories of what happened in the chat room that night. Thanks for helping me out.

Dave

stating the truth as it was...as others support it to have been...that is not hostility...that is HONESTY. the ONLY reason you felt unwelcome is because of the reaction you got to the pm's you mistakingly posted for the whole room to see. you were acting like the school yard bully who pulls hair and then expects a hug instead of a slap to his face. you can convince everyone who was NOT there of your innocence in the matter...you won't convince those of us who were actually there so easily. that is the one transcript i wish i had to share.

[Spartan 4]

You know, I wonder how many people hiding under their rocks sit there behind their keyboards and call US the big bad wolf, not even to our 'faces', but on some 'lets hate everyone in the chatroom board'. I wonder why all of you have such a big pair of balls now- to hate on us, when YOU wern't there. Every side has two stories. Did dave also fill you in on all of the rude comments he had accidently posted in the main room? How they we're hateful and demeaning? I didn't think so. But go ahead and feel sorry for poor ol' road withered Dave since he took his time on the forum ( which he doesn't need or want in his life, of course) to describe how pitiful he is. Don't even second guess EXACTLY why we were talking about intercourse that night. But just in case you do- I'll tell you why. We were talking about making love and intercourse because these people have endured a very long deployment of my husbands and I was simply expressing to my FAMILY how nervous and scared I was for intimacy again after being away from my husband for such a long time........I hope you have had a good time ASSuming what mean and heartless people we are.......

To those of you disagree with DaveNW's version of what happened in the Chat Room:

I do not know DaveNW, nor have I corresponded with him at any time. However, I have observed that he is a very helpful, supportive, and polite individual who only wants to lend support and advice to people who are struggling in this process. He has become a valued member of this community. I enjoy most of what Dave has to say, and he has been very supportive of a number of members here.

Unlike YOU clowns, who have chosen NOT to contribute a damn thing to any part of this community other than amusing yourselves by discussing subjects that (amongst reasonably civilized, mature, and cultured individuals) would be considered private topics. Your responses here also make it abundantly clear why some men PREFER Military service over being at home with the wife.

You don’t think you’re “attacking” Dave here? Perhaps you don’t. You probably don’t even understand the word, considering it has more than one syllable.

And after reading your childish, absurd and STUPID remarks in THIS thread, I can say without a moment’s hesitation that I will confidently believe Dave’s version of the events over YOUR foolish, fictitious version any day of the week.

I think that you would be doing the community-at-large a significant service if you would crawl back into your little chat-hole, close the hatch, seal it, and concentrate on keeping your Bieber-Fever under control .

S.

[mattie7632 24]

Ditto that

To those of you disagree with DaveNW's version of what happened in the Chat Room:

I do not know DaveNW, nor have I corresponded with him at any time. However, I have observed that he is a very helpful, supportive, and polite individual who only wants to lend support and advice to people who are struggling in this process. He has become a valued member of this community. I enjoy most of what Dave has to say, and he has been very supportive of a number of members here.

Unlike YOU clowns, who have chosen NOT to contribute a damn thing to any part of this community other than amusing yourselves by discussing subjects that (amongst reasonably civilized, mature, and cultured individuals) would be considered private topics. Your responses here also make it abundantly clear why some men PREFER Military service over being at home with the wife.

You don't think you're "attacking" Dave here? Perhaps you don't. You probably don't even understand the word, considering it has more than one syllable.

And after reading your childish, absurd and STUPID remarks in THIS thread, I can say without a moment's hesitation that I will confidently believe Dave's version of the events over YOUR foolish, fictitious version any day of the week.

I think that you would be doing the community-at-large a significant service if you would crawl back into your little chat-hole, close the hatch, seal it, and concentrate on keeping your Bieber-Fever under control .

S.

[Pippy1973 3]

To those of you disagree with DaveNW's version of what happened in the Chat Room:

I do not know DaveNW, nor have I corresponded with him at any time. However, I have observed that he is a very helpful, supportive, and polite individual who only wants to lend support and advice to people who are struggling in this process. He has become a valued member of this community. I enjoy most of what Dave has to say, and he has been very supportive of a number of members here.

Unlike YOU clowns, who have chosen NOT to contribute a damn thing to any part of this community other than amusing yourselves by discussing subjects that (amongst reasonably civilized, mature, and cultured individuals) would be considered private topics. Your responses here also make it abundantly clear why some men PREFER Military service over being at home with the wife.

You don't think you're "attacking" Dave here? Perhaps you don't. You probably don't even understand the word, considering it has more than one syllable.

And after reading your childish, absurd and STUPID remarks in THIS thread, I can say without a moment's hesitation that I will confidently believe Dave's version of the events over YOUR foolish, fictitious version any day of the week.

I think that you would be doing the community-at-large a significant service if you would crawl back into your little chat-hole, close the hatch, seal it, and concentrate on keeping your Bieber-Fever under control .

S.

dave was anything but kind and helpful on this night. as you yourself said, you were not there so you really have no right to comment. oh, but wait, yes you do...because men like ali's husband are fighting to support the rights for any person to state their opinion regardless of how ignorant it makes them look. now, let me explain this even slower so hopefully even you can understand. those of us in chat like the real time conversations that we are allowed to have there. for many of us, the chat room is our support group. i have not had one question about the band that has not been answered in this room. that being said, many of us are there for hours a day. we talk about many things in our lives. the band is just one of them. ali's husband was returning from iraq and, as she told you and you so coldly insulted her for, she was having concerns. as her friends, we were helping, supporting her through those. i have never seen anyone with a question about the band not have their question answered by at the very LEAST one person in the room. the regulars are friends though....and as such, we have supported each other through many things. the band is a LIFE CHANGE. all areas of life...only a small minded person would believe that life change means we only discuss a plastic ring around our stomachs.