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I'm same way only my husband and son know. My work knows I'm having surgery, but not why. It makes having a support system harder though.

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Hi

I am getting banded and the only person who knows is my mother. I have told my kids that I am just going away for a short city break. I feel awful about not telling them but their reaction was so negative when I first mentioned that I was looking into it. I just pray that everything goes well and that there are no complications.

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Had to get an Upper GI today. I'm still not even sure if I'm a 100% good candidate for the lap band. When I had my endoscopy 2 weeks ago...they saw something leaning into my stomach. They best way to describe it would be...... if you were looking down into an inflated balloon (your stomach) and you took your finger and pushed into the side of the balloon; you would see an indent. That's what they saw from the endoscopy. I'm not feeling any pain....just at times a little pressure. We have to figure out what "that" is before we can go further. On Friday, I had a contrast CT scan. Hopefully, I'll get the results of both tests before the end of the week. I'm not toooo nervous about it... I'm keeping the faith that it's nothing to worry about. sad.gif

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I've just told people I'm having a hiatal hernia repair and my dr wants me to lose some weight before surgery to make it safer an a quicker recovery. And it's true, o am having a hernia repair...I just didn't tell anyone that a lapband was going in @ the same time.

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I too have only told a handfull of people. I have not yet told my siblings.

When I told my daughter that I didn't know if I was.going to tell them she told me why? You should be very proud that you made this decision ... She's right and I am proud and working VERY hard at the pre op diet

I don't know if I'll tell them maybe I'll just let them think that this time I did it! If they ask, I'll tell. Our family party is on 12/26 and I'll be on day 10 of the preop so I'm pretty sure they'll notice the weight loss. I'm already down 21 pounds since this summer and will probably lose another 15 by then.

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I feel like I've been worried for nothing; I told my dad today and another one of my sisters yesterday and the worst reaction I've got is "do your research; I know some people that had it and..." blah blah blah you know the rest. Now I just need to see what my mom thinks. I guess sometimes FEAR is actually our worst critic...

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This is my first post. I saw the question and had to see how others had dealt with this question. It is great to know others may have struggled with this question. (To tell or not to tell...) I have only told my husband, who is very supportive, and my daughter, who was banded in early November and has done very well. She encourages me. My dad is really sick and my mom and siblings don't need to worry about me in surgery. It is none of my coworkers business. I am a very private person in a very small town. I will answer people directly if they guess, but unless that happens, I won't go into detail. If I do, it becomes the office gossip. :-) Right now, my co-workers know I have a hernia to be repaired. I do have a hiatal hernia, and the Doc is going to repair it. This way, I am not lying.

My pre-surgical visit is tomorrow. My surgery is Jan 6th. A great way to start the new year! Tee

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This is my first post. I saw the question and had to see how others had dealt with this question. It is great to know others may have struggled with this question. (To tell or not to tell...) I have only told my husband, who is very supportive, and my daughter, who was banded in early November and has done very well. She encourages me. My dad is really sick and my mom and siblings don't need to worry about me in surgery. It is none of my coworkers business. I am a very private person in a very small town. I will answer people directly if they guess, but unless that happens, I won't go into detail. If I do, it becomes the office gossip. :-) Right now, my co-workers know I have a hernia to be repaired. I do have a hiatal hernia, and the Doc is going to repair it. This way, I am not lying.

My pre-surgical visit is tomorrow. My surgery is Jan 6th. A great way to start the new year! Tee

I also live in a small town. Unless one lives in one or has lived in one, I would imagine it may be hard to understand what it is like for everyone to know everyone and everything and what they do not know, they make up.

Welcome and best of luck to you!

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Hi,

I am getting banded on 12/27/10. At first I didn't want anyone to know about it. I had to tell my husband of course, but I made him swear to tell no one. I didn't want to be judged or hear anything negitive at all. I am a mother of three young kids, so I had to ask for help watching them while I went to Houston which is about 4 hours away several days in a row for several weeks in a row to do all the stuff to get the insurance to approve. My mother in law got worried that there was something really wrong, and it came out that i was going to have surgery. Of course she wouldn't let me be until I told her why. When I did she smiled and hugged me and told me that she was really glad that I was doing something to get healthy. After she found out it was a lil easier to tell my mom and my dad. Mostly everyone is really supportive, my mom was a lil concerned about it cause she knew someone who knew someone that had it and had serious problems. But once I made it clear to hear that this was what I wanted, she started trying to be supportive too. Basically the whole reason I am saying this is if you are not comfortable with anyone knowing, then don't tell anyone right now. The people close to you will find out at some point, and when they do it just may surprise you how they react. When it is all said and done it is your body, your life and your decision. Do what is best for you.

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Have told my whole immediate family now and have received nothing but support; my mom even said HER doctor mentioned it to her and she might consider it if I do well! Feeling a bit sheepish about wanting to keep it a secret from the fam; SO glad to have it off my chest!

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I am usually a big mouth and tell everyone everything. When I went to my first support meeting at my doctor's office the first thing that was said by one lady was BE CAREFUL WHO YOU TELL. It really got me thinking and I decided not the tell anyone except husband, children, and sister-in-law (my number one support person).

It has been hard for me sometimes because I am an open book. I just did not want any negtively.

Then last week I was hospitalized for 5 days. I was septsis with E coli. I was so thankful that my extented family and friends did not know about my band. I know I would have had to hear how the band made me sick and how I was wrong to get it. Well it was NOT the band that made me sick but I could have never have convinced them.

I can always tell them when I am ready. It may be years from now. Once you tell you can never take it back. Listen to that small iner voice. You will know when and who to tell.

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I found out today that my problem was a MINOR case of Diverticulitis due to a diet with poor Fiber. So I'm good to go for the lap band. My doctor is scheduling me for Dec 27th. I was shocked it's sooooooooooo soon!!! Start my pre-op diet on Monday. That is making me a little nervous, scared, excited, nervous, HAPPY, and did I say ....nervous!!!

I've decided to keep this just between me an my husband for now. I'm sure I'll "fess" up soon though. I'm just gonna take one day at a time for now.

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I finally borke down and told my mom. She is normally against WLS becuase we've had a couple of relatives that have had Gastic By- pass Surgery...2 were unsuccessful and 1 (unfortunately) just recently passed away due to Cancer , not necessarily related to Gastric Bypass. So, I knew she would probaly not agree with me doing this. I started the process with only my AMAZING hubby's support. He has been so good to me throughout this whole ordeal.

Anyway, just last Monday I was talking with mom on the phone. She was on her way out to do some Christmas shopping. She mentioned she was going to pick me up something from Dillard's. I mentioned to her that I really didn't want her to buy me any clothes right now becuase I " had somethings going on?" She immediately pannicked and thought I was ill and made me tell her what was going on. So, I just told her ,explained about the PCOS and all of my weight gain and defeated efforts to lose weight.

Well, to my surprise, momma was estatic !!!! She was so happy and excited for me. She even said she was going to take off from work and help us with the boys so, my husband can stay with me at the hospital . She said she had recently noticed that I had been gaining weight but, wasn't sure how to mention it to me without hurting my feelings.

I am so glad she knows. Now , I have one more cheerleader in my corner. :)

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I finally borke down and told my mom. She is normally against WLS becuase we've had a couple of relatives that have had Gastic By- pass Surgery...2 were unsuccessful and 1 (unfortunately) just recently passed away due to Cancer , not necessarily related to Gastric Bypass. So, I knew she would probaly not agree with me doing this. I started the process with only my AMAZING hubby's support. He has been so good to me throughout this whole ordeal.

Anyway, just last Monday I was talking with mom on the phone. She was on her way out to do some Christmas shopping. She mentioned she was going to pick me up something from Dillard's. I mentioned to her that I really didn't want her to buy me any clothes right now becuase I " had somethings going on?" She immediately pannicked and thought I was ill and made me tell her what was going on. So, I just told her ,explained about the PCOS and all of my weight gain and defeated efforts to lose weight.

Well, to my surprise, momma was estatic !!!! She was so happy and excited for me. She even said she was going to take off from work and help us with the boys so, my husband can stay with me at the hospital . She said she had recently noticed that I had been gaining weight but, wasn't sure how to mention it to me without hurting my feelings.

I am so glad she knows. Now , I have one more cheerleader in my corner. :)

I am delighted that your Mom is with you and happy for you! How wonderful for you to have this great support in place.

Good Luck on your journey!

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As it is right now more people know then I would like about me getting this done. I have a job and a part time job and at both places is at least 1 person who has had it done, with great results and little to no complciations, yet I still heard negative feed back. Thankfully in both places are a few people who are greatly supporting me as well and that really helps. My immediate family knows and a few other family members that had to be told because the surgery & recovery time interfered with other family plans that were extremely important and I couldnt play the "sorry I work" card. I wouldnt have told the in-laws (all but one arent totally pro idea) but I have one that lives with us and has a big mouth so...they all know. Really quick I had to get thick skin because I wasnt just hearing the negative feed back cuz of surgery but also because I'm going to Mexico. So I just tell them the facts, results of my research, and end it with "Its my body, my mind, my soul, my decision. Thank you for worrying however I have done my homework and I have made up my mind and feel confident I am doing the right thing for me and my family". After that they can scoff all they want or support me...thats their decision. For the most part though I have noticed, I have more support then negativity I just need to tone out the negative ones and I'm fine =)

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