I can't decide when / if to tell others about my surgery. I have told most of my family but have told none of my co-workers. The atmosphere here is full of gossipy people and I prefer to keep my business to myself.

Do I need to tell my co-workers why I'm out for a week or why I'm losing weight?

I just can't decide if it is best to be open about the procedure or keep my personal life out of the office.

Any suggestions?

It'd be different if you were a tight knit group but if they are gossipy then keep it to yourself. If they ask tell them you took a vacation. It's none of their business.

I decided to tell only one of my co-workers and no one else ,i trust her to keep it to herself. I just took a PTO and said it was a vacation on APRIl 23 i got bandend and was back to work on Tue next week. There are alot of HATERS AND GOSSIPERS in my team and i have learnt that you need to keep your personal life separate from your work life. Let the haters and gossipers be your motivators and once you start loosing weight they will even talk more and hate on you . Epecially the ones who look down on you to feel better among themselvers , i cant wait until i loose my weight and i can dress and look better.

I decided to tell only my husband and my mother. I do not regret this decision in the least.

When people ask me how I am losing the weight, I say, I am finally taking care of myself, and I am working out and going to weight watchers.

Both true. I go to weight watchers to be weighed, but don't really follow their plan, but I don't need to tell that to my group at work!

I was very thankful no one knew when I wasn't losing weight from surgery to the third fill. I would have had a lot of explaining to do as to why I wasn't shedding more weight .

I only told my family. I did not tell anyone at work. My surgery was on Thurs 4-16. I took of Thurs, Fri and Mon. I went back to work on Tues. I felt fine. My manager asked what I did on my time off and I just said "took care of some things that I needed to get done that I have been putting off, and hung around the house." Maybe someday I will tell but for now I don't see any reason they need to know.

Hi! I'm new here and in the process of obtaining my surgery....I've only told 4 people what I'm trying to accomplish (2 of my best friends, my husband and my mom) for pretty much the same reason you did not tell your co-workers....gossip and also unwanted advice and/or opinions. I can't be swayed, this is my decision and I'm sure this is what I need to do for myself, but unfortunately, I'm surrounded by people (including some family) who don't mind their own business and talk behind my back. So I choose to say nothing at all, and if people start to notice after my surgery, then I'll tell them....maybe;) That's just me....maybe depending on who you can and can't trust, might want to do the same :thumbup: Good Luck! Michele

I feel better about not feeling the need to tell everyone my business. I'm not ashamed of the surgery - in fact I'm very excited, but I just don't want to be inundated with tons of questions and I don't want everyone watching and waiting for me to drop a few more pounds.

Any suggestions for what to say to the persistant people that don't know when to back off? There's an older lady at my office that even wants to know where I go when I'm on my BREAK!

Thanks for everyones input and help - I do appreciate it. I was starting to really think it was necessary to tell everyone.

If you really feel the need to tell them a medical reason tell them you had your gall bladder removed or appendix. That will explain the soreness but wont garner a lot of questions. But really you should not have to explain, I dont want to tell coworkers because I dont want the food police watching everything I do and dont do. And I dont want the gossip that is sure to happen as people just dont have enough of their own business to mind, they have to talk about everyone else. Maybe once I clear bandster hell and start dropping I will feel different but for now just my immediate family, husband and 1 friend knows (who also has done this).

I am telling no one at work because, like you I work in a gossip crazy office. We have several people that have had RNY and are very open about and that's fine for them(plus it's hard to hide that much loss so quickly). I told my boss I'll probably need to have my gall bladder out soon(so I'm medical leave and don't use vacation). I've slowly been losing weight the past year so I don't think it will be questioned.

Thank you all for the great advice!! I don't want people making judgement on my decision.. Some people are mean and don't like it when others better themselves.

I told everyone. The only thing that makes me a regret it a little bit is that some people expect me to lose weight really quickly and wonder why I am not losing like 5kgs a week.

I didn't care if anyone had anything negative to say about it. Its my body, my life and my choice. If they want to be negative about someone trying to improve their health and quality of life, then they are a sad person...

Good luck!

Hi! This is my first post. I am starting day one of my liquid diet before surgery...so excited.

I am trying to keep in mind that eventually everyone is going to find out. Some person will spill the beans and I don't want to look more foolish later. I am careful to not talk about it with anyone who may have an opinion because I have made my choice and am not interested. Our endeavor is SO personal, it's a fine line to walk!

I choose to tell my husband and my son and not until 2 weeks before surgery! It had to be my decision and I knew it would be a slow weight loss and did not want anyone judging me. I did tell two friends after and since I do not work outsde the home I do not have to deal with the workplace which can be a harsh one.

3 months out I am glad I kept it low key. No regrets here.

If you really feel the need to tell them a medical reason tell them you had your gall bladder removed or appendix. That will explain the soreness but wont garner a lot of questions. But really you should not have to explain, I dont want to tell coworkers because I dont want the food police watching everything I do and dont do. And I dont want the gossip that is sure to happen as people just dont have enough of their own business to mind, they have to talk about everyone else. Maybe once I clear bandster hell and start dropping I will feel different but for now just my immediate family, husband and 1 friend knows (who also has done this).

I told my bosses and co-workers (including the other receptionist that is covering for me) that I'm having an ovarian cyst removed (would explain lower abdomin sutchers- as per my sister & girlfriends who actually had that done) So far, it's working, we'll see next monday when I go back to work (surgery is thursday (5/7)

i just told folks, that I was having a small procedure done and I would be out for a few days. I wanted to make sure that I could lose the 20 pounds my doctor required so I started the liquids about 4 weeks out, as it turns out it has kind of conditioned folks at work to see me with slim-fast an no really asks anymore. I will not deny it if asked, but felt no need to proactively share.

Hi, Well work for myself from Home so dont have the issue with people at work. I really have only told two people, My Wife on the other hand has told most of our good friends. At first I think she was looking for people to try and talk me out of it. But most of her friends are professional people. A good friend who is a nurse thought it was a good idea as she sees what a hard time heavy people have in the Hospital especially as they get older, Another is a neutrisionest and also felt it was a good idea, another works in the medical field and felt it was good also but I need to understand how little food I would eat. My wife told some others today a church as I decided to stay home, I want to avoid any germs, they came over to see me in the afternoon and were supportive as they we concerned with possible health issues.

My reason not to tell lots of people was simply that I did not want their OPINION! Now that It is done, I will most probibly shair this information with others, but again my wife has done a good job at that. She reports back their commements many have been OH HE IS NOT THAT HEAVY! Something we all like to hear.

Good luck to you. I was banded on May 1st and feeling a bit sore but good.

Take Care

ROSS