Regrets

[Victoria Wank 18]

1 hour ago, ElleRodri said:

61 days until my surgery and I'm already having buyers remorse. I know it's all in my head. I have an amazingly supportive husband in all of it and he's had to hear the gambit of my emotions from elation to utter defeat surrounding this surgery, so much so that he honestly doesn't know what to think sometimes. But he's on board 100% even if it does mean he will have to do most of the cooking for himself and our kids for a while so that I can adjust to turning down the "head hunger". I ordered a few different Protein powders and shot (an assortment box) so that I could start the prep work. I have been so bad lately about "well I can't have it after surgery, so I'm gonna stuff my face with it now" ice cream, Cookies, I think I had 5 normal sized cupcakes on 4th of July. At this point sometimes I'm eating just to eat because I still have issues to address with my eating. I have psych appointments lined up with the bariatrics team at mayo as well as my usual psych and shrink. I want to get a hold on my relationship with food before the surgery and with so little time left I'm worried that I can't do it.

I'm petrified that I am going to mess myself up worse having the surgery than if I just kept going without it. Weightloss isn't the #1 reason I'm having the surgery, just a big bonus. I have to have the surgery because of another surgery I had almost 20 years ago starting to come undone and causing issues and more damage. I'm so scared right now that I'm going to end up hating myself for putting myself through the misery. But it's time to "Embrace the Suck" and move forward.

We are all in various places, but it's so great seeing everyone be so supportive from every walk. I'm happy to have found this site.

I understand the “let me eat it all now, because I won’t be able to eat it after the surgery.” I’ve done it, too.
I know you’re scared about the surgery. The only thing I can suggest is for you to think of the reason for the surgery. You’re not having “weight-loss surgery.” You’re having a surgery to fix another problem. Actually, that’s how we got the Roux-en-Y. It was for a different gastric problem, and the patients and doctors noticed the weight loss. Then they started using the surgery specifically for weight loss.

You’re fortunate to have a very supportive husband. It will be helpful during your recovery and the weight loss that accompanies it. You can do this!

[Victoria Wank 18]

https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/treatment-tests-and-therapies/argon-plasma-coagulation-for-weight-loss

[CarmenG 148]

I had a serious case of buyer's remorse during my second week post op. I even thought, "I should've just stayed the way I was!" But I am feeling better. I try to do a lot of reading about the bypass and revisions. I'm a sleeve to bypass revision. I'm 23 days out and at a weight stall. I'm finding it hard to consume more than 56-64 oz of Water a day. I'm craving caffeine like crazy. And I'm experiencing Constipation and not sure how to add more Fiber without adding more carbs. It's tricky getting just enough of this and not too much of that. What's helping my mindset, though, is looking back at my very first pic (starting weight) and looking at my most recent. I haven't lost much (comparatively speaking), but I feel better. I can wash the dishes, cook dinner for my daughter, and bathe without running out of breath or having my back aching and burning. I can dress myself without having to sit on the bed. My skin looks fantastic. Focus on all of the things that have gotten better since your pre-op diet. Focus on the future weight loss you'll experience (even if it's going slower than you'd like). Focus on things you'll be able to consume in a couple of months. You can look up recipes and save them for month 2 and month 3 and so on. Also, I don't know if you pray, but if you do, pray for peace of mind. All of these things help me, and they may help you as well.

[omrhsn 608]

I didn't have any regrets after the WLS but I remember feeling miserable during the liquid and pureed food stage. Drinking chicken Soup that was just bland and had no spices all day was not the best thing. My sister who had her surgery three weeks before me helped me a lot and made sure I pass that time without any issues or setbacks. We got your back.

Just think of all the things you will be able to do and achieve after your start losing weight and that will definitely help you go through it. Good luck and hang in there.

[kokab 1]

Being home from surgery is like being home your first baby- regrets, can’t take it back, what did I do, oh God is this my life now but two weeks later you start to feel normal again and better and it’s okay. I went through this too.

[ElleRodri 39]

It's nice that there are people who are completely open and honest about how it feels going into it and coming out of it. That helps substantially, just knowing I'm not alone and that it's normal to be going through all of these emotions. I may cycle through them a little faster because of the bipolar or maybe it's because I see the surgical date as a looming number still and not something I'm super excited about most days. But I am getting more positive about it, even a little excited. Disappointed that I couldn't buy a cute little sundress because I just can't justify buying clothes right now with a WLS procedure on the horizon. But thinking about what possibilities this could open back up for me made me excited. So I'm in a Neutral leaning towards positive right now I guess is the best way to describe it.

I know I should be happy but this is my last chance at a semblance of normalcy with food. Everything makes me miserable at this point except for fluids and a few bland items when it comes to real food, but if it's sweet I can eat a dozen of whatever it may be. Can't handle nitrates, tomatoes, anything spicy, oregano, and the list goes on but that's all I can spitball off the top of my head without looking in my pantry while I type this, haha. I've just labeled things I can't handle with a big red X, which keeps me out of it and lets the kids know it's fair game. I am just a big hot mess right now. But I'm hoping beyond hope that this fixes my issues because I miss spaghetti LoL I make some kick butt sauce.

[BabySpoons 531]

It's easy to be regretful those first few weeks after surgery. You are sore, hormones shifting etc. Give it time. 3 months out I can do things I haven't been able to do for years.

Sure I can't have some of my favorite foods. But because I'm no longer sedentary and eating out of boredom, my mind is on other things besides my next meal. Before I rarely moved from my couch and now I'm walking 2 miles a day outside. I'm so loving it.

After my doc appointment this week, I went to a huge mall and walked the length of it and back without taking a rest. Before, my back would have been killing me and I would have had to sit down. Honestly I wouldn't have even attempted it pre-op. I felt like a bird let out of a cage. I didn't buy any new clothes but I did splurge and got my brows done by a sweet little gal from India who has mastered the art of brow threading.

This morning I'm going to the gym, getting a cryo therapy treatment, sitting in an infrared sauna then to the Chiropractor to help straighten me out as I lose weight.

Just remember, there's more to life than just food. Enjoy your weekend

[NCL04321 151]

On 6/26/2023 at 7:23 PM, la.nena said:

I’m 6 weeks out. And was able to eat loaded mashed potatoes. Only about 4 tablespoons. I regret it now. No dumping syndrome nothing. Just guilt. Worried that I will be able to just eat anything like normal. 😑

You will be able to eat anything like normal! However, you have to be careful about what you choose to eat! Read lablels and track the food you eat in an app. I like the baritastic app. Once you see how many calories you ate from the loaded mashed potatoes, it will make you think about eating them again! It's not worth it to go back to the old habits we all had that got us into this obese predicament! Stay strong and resist the temptations, you can do it!!!

[Victoria Wank 18]

On 7/12/2023 at 8:01 PM, CarmenG said:

I had a serious case of buyer's remorse during my second week post op. I even thought, "I should've just stayed the way I was!" But I am feeling better. I try to do a lot of reading about the bypass and revisions. I'm a sleeve to bypass revision. I'm 23 days out and at a weight stall. I'm finding it hard to consume more than 56-64 oz of Water a day. I'm craving caffeine like crazy. And I'm experiencing Constipation and not sure how to add more Fiber without adding more carbs. It's tricky getting just enough of this and not too much of that. What's helping my mindset, though, is looking back at my very first pic (starting weight) and looking at my most recent. I haven't lost much (comparatively speaking), but I feel better. I can wash the dishes, cook dinner for my daughter, and bathe without running out of breath or having my back aching and burning. I can dress myself without having to sit on the bed. My skin looks fantastic. Focus on all of the things that have gotten better since your pre-op diet. Focus on the future weight loss you'll experience (even if it's going slower than you'd like). Focus on things you'll be able to consume in a couple of months. You can look up recipes and save them for month 2 and month 3 and so on. Also, I don't know if you pray, but if you do, pray for peace of mind. All of these things help me, and they may help you as well.

I experienced the weight stall and Constipation. However, the weight that I have lost took a big load off my back, and I’m not in as much pain from that. I actually ended up in the ER because I was so constipated. I had tried to get it out the natural way, but it got stuck, and I was in so much pain and didn’t know what to do (this was the first time I had ever been constipated), so I called 911. Now it’s something I have to watch out for. I have Miralax and Lactulose on hand if it gets really bad. Try the Miralax first. Get incontinence pads, like Tena, and place them in pairs in the usual place and behind those (you’re going to leak). Also get disposable incontinence Chuks for wherever you sleep, because you’ll leak there, too. Have disposable gloves on hand and be prepared to glove up and get it out manually when it gets stuck, and you can’t push it out without feeling like you’re going to split in half. I know it’s gross, but I lost 6 pounds in about 5 days.

I spoke with my surgeon, and she told me that stalls and constipation are to be expected with revision surgery. Talk to your surgeon about your concerns, and ask if there are other options that you can do. I learned that the Argon Coagulation surgery I had was only the first of several to expect.

[SleeverSk 617]

3 hours ago, Victoria **** said:

I experienced the weight stall and Constipation. However, the weight that I have lost took a big load off my back, and I’m not in as much pain from that. I actually ended up in the ER because I was so constipated. I had tried to get it out the natural way, but it got stuck, and I was in so much pain and didn’t know what to do (this was the first time I had ever been constipated), so I called 911. Now it’s something I have to watch out for. I have Miralax and Lactulose on hand if it gets really bad. Try the Miralax first. Get incontinence pads, like Tena, and place them in pairs in the usual place and behind those (you’re going to leak). Also get disposable incontinence Chuks for wherever you sleep, because you’ll leak there, too. Have disposable gloves on hand and be prepared to glove up and get it out manually when it gets stuck, and you can’t push it out without feeling like you’re going to split in half. I know it’s gross, but I lost 6 pounds in about 5 days.

I spoke with my surgeon, and she told me that stalls and Constipation are to be expected with revision surgery. Talk to your surgeon about your concerns, and ask if there are other options that you can do. I learned that the Argon Coagulation surgery I had was only the first of several to expect.

WOW, I'm sorry but that's not normal, why on earth should you "expect" to have more Surgeries and to put up with your bowel issues, it sounds awful. A little bit of constipation sure but what you have described is full on. Has your dr checked you for any underlying issues? am I missing something here? I would be getting a second opinion.

[CarmenG 148]

SleeverSk, The Argon Coagulation surgery is very different from a bypass. From what I read, this surgery creates scar tissue to make stomach pouches smaller. I can see how there would need to be more than one if that's all they're doing.

[SleeverSk 617]

2 minutes ago, CarmenG said:

SleeverSk, The Argon Coagulation surgery is very different from a bypass. From what I read, this surgery creates scar tissue to make stomach pouches smaller. I can see how there would need to be more than one if that's all they're doing.

Yes, I just saw the link and read the info on the page; I see its more of a treatment rather than a "surgery". But still having Constipation to that level is not good and something else might be going on.

[kawzican 11]

I'm six weeks post op and I'm still feeling some regret. For one, I miss my boyfriend and I being able to spontaneously go grab a few beers and some dinner. I suppose I will never be able to go have a few beers before dinner again, though I'm hoping to eventually be able to do both separated by an hour or so. HAHA!

On a serious note, the last few weeks I've been hyperaware of every little thing that my stomach is feeling. I'm confused about whether I'm hungry, anxious, have heartburn, am I full or just bloated. I can "feel" every drink of Fluid or bite of food go down and my stomach immediately feels like it does this bubble thing and I need to burp. Maybe some of this is mental, but there just doesn't seem like I have many moments where I'm not somehow "aware" of my stomach, even if it doesn't feel particularly bad, I am just aware that it's there. It's annoying and I'm really hoping that someone can come along and tell me that this too shall pass.

And someone said something about being able to guzzle Water again eventually. I really miss being able to guzzle water. I'd really like to be able to drink water more rapidly as well. HA!

Also, at 6 weeks post-op, am I able to eat about as much as I'm going to be able to eat? I'd take less weight loss, if it meant being able to eat more than 1/4 cup of food at a time. 🙂

And to add insult to injury, I've only lost 20 pounds in 6 weeks, so I must be one of those super slow losers because I'm following the rules... for the most part.

Thanks in advance for your input and encouragement.

[SleeverSk 617]

13 hours ago, kawzican said:

I'm six weeks post op and I'm still feeling some regret. For one, I miss my boyfriend and I being able to spontaneously go grab a few beers and some dinner. I suppose I will never be able to go have a few beers before dinner again, though I'm hoping to eventually be able to do both separated by an hour or so. HAHA!

On a serious note, the last few weeks I've been hyperaware of every little thing that my stomach is feeling. I'm confused about whether I'm hungry, anxious, have heartburn, am I full or just bloated. I can "feel" every drink of Fluid or bite of food go down and my stomach immediately feels like it does this bubble thing and I need to burp. Maybe some of this is mental, but there just doesn't seem like I have many moments where I'm not somehow "aware" of my stomach, even if it doesn't feel particularly bad, I am just aware that it's there. It's annoying and I'm really hoping that someone can come along and tell me that this too shall pass.

And someone said something about being able to guzzle Water again eventually. I really miss being able to guzzle Water. I'd really like to be able to drink water more rapidly as well. HA!

Also, at 6 weeks post-op, am I able to eat about as much as I'm going to be able to eat? I'd take less weight loss, if it meant being able to eat more than 1/4 cup of food at a time. 🙂

And to add insult to injury, I've only lost 20 pounds in 6 weeks, so I must be one of those super slow losers because I'm following the rules... for the most part.

Thanks in advance for your input and encouragement.

Embrace this period while you can, don't rush into things. but yes, you will be able to have a beer before a meal, yes you will be able to guzzle some water you will just have to learn where your new stop point is. yes, you will be able to eat way more than you thought would be possible and long for the early days of restriction. 20 pounds in 6 weeks is good you are right on track

[TRAVELRN 68]

On 6/20/2023 at 3:34 PM, Heatherhei said:

Im 11 days post op and im kind of regretting this. I miss eating, and by that i mean chewing and having that flavor. everything i can eat right now is soft and bland. I cant wait till I have more options and maybe i wont be so down on it.

I remember waking up in the hospital and thought to myself "WTF did I do to myself" that feeling was only fleeting as I focused on one thing at a time. Use the time to learn about your eating triggers and cues. They will help you down the road. Today I would do it again no question, I feel fantastic, off blood pressure meds feel a million times better. Its a day to day thing still for me and I don't worry about tomorrow, just living in the moment and understanding much more about myself than ever. Its amazing once your focus on yourself and your health the things you never paid much attention to.