... but not for the reasons you might think.

I questioned whether I should make this post in the preop section or here, but since it's my first post on the forum, it might as well serve as an introduction as well. My apologies in advance for the verbosity, as I have a tendency to ramble.

At age 54, I've been morbidly obese since I was a teen. I have no personal frame of reference as to what it means to be fit or eat healthily. Sure, there's the cognitive recognition of what those concepts are and what they should mean, but nothing in my own life experiences that are relatable. I'm 6'1" and at my heaviest weighed 410. Five years ago I was diagnosed with high blood pressure, which medication has fortunately kept under control. In June of 2019, when I weighed 385, I was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes. It was at this point, that I realized I actually needed to do something about losing weight beyond paying lip service.

I've been feeling it more in my knees and ankles the last few years, and the notion that should I ever need a knee replacement or other major joint surgery, that I would likely be denied due to my weight wasn't an enticing prospect.

I've made token efforts at points in my life to dieting and exercise, but nothing consistent; nothing that "stuck". So I spoke with my primary physician about bariatric surgery options and started down this road. After consultations and doing my own research, I decided on the sleeve gastrectomy. Over the several month "trial period" (not sure what the technical term is), meeting with dieticians, the surgeon, the psychologist, etc., my surgery was approved and scheduled for mid April of this year... well, you can guess what happened. Thanks to COVID-19 everything was put on hold.

I freaked out a bit at that point. My work schedule is such that certain times of the year are no-go as far as being away for extended periods. What if my recovery takes longer than expected? What if due to the quarantine and stress eating (believe me, it's a thing), I gain weight again and they kick me out of the program? Having all this uncertainty on top of all the uncertainty going on in the world... being in a high-risk group for COVID, the business I work for having to completely retool how it does business, the financial market crash (at the time), the civil unrest in an election year, etc.,put my head in a not very happy place.

I'm also stressed by the fact that I have no immediate support structure in the event things go wrong (either medically or if I slip with respect to eating habits). I have no family, no significant other, and I live alone. Under normal circumstances, I'm perfectly fine and dandy with all three of those things, but for the first time in my life, I'm faced with the prospect of not having support when I might need it. I've never head surgery in my life, outside of two colonoscopies, which all things considered, I've been blessed in that regard, but again I have no frame of reference of what to expect and what to do in the event things don't proceed as planned.

I've avoided reading many of the threads here simply because I don't want to read about worst-case scenarios, as I know that my mind will tend to drift there, and I don't want the negatives of what *might* happen to dominate my thoughts right now.

So back to the present... at the beginning of June things started to open back up in the state, at least as far as allowing elective surgeries to be back on the docket. I'm scheduled for surgery on July 13.

The 14-day preop diet (which I started on June 29) that my hospital prescribes is more restrictive than many others. No meat in addition to no carbs or fats. It's a 1000-1150 calorie per day diet. As someone who normally would eat 3000-5000 calories per day, that's effectively a snack.

So I'm in the middle of day 6... and everything is fine.

And I have no idea why.

I *SHOULD* be frothing at the mouth, hangry, threatening to eat the neighbor's cats, etc., but for some reason I'm not hungry at all, and this cognitively makes no sense to me based upon my "normal" eating habits.

I've been actually eating less than 800 calories per day, not even up to the recommended 1000-1150 calories.

• Breakfast: protein shake (30g protein, 140-160 calories depending on brand)
• Morning snack: Yoplait light yogurt (90 calories)
• Lunch: 12-oz pouch of steamed vegetables with garlic and pepper (80-140 calories depending on what mix I use)
• Afternoon snack: apple slices (50-80 calories)
• Dinner: Another protein shake (140-160 calories)
• Evening snack: another yogurt (90 calories)

I'll mix in sugar-free jello (5 calories) throughout the day or some celery sticks as needed, and if feeling peckish will do an extra pouch of steamed vegetables.

What's freaking me out is why I'm not freaking out... if that makes any sense. It shouldn't be this easy, and I worrying that I ma be lulling myself into a false sense of security/complacency.

Or is my brain somehow making this easier on me, as somewhere deep down in the depths of my subconscious I fundamentally realize that I *have* to make this work?

I don't know; it's hard to convey.

I was at 351 on Sunday prior to starting the diet (and yes, I pigged out on Saturday and Sunday knowing what was ahead) and am now down to 339 as of this morning, which is a good thing.

Just trying to get a handle on why my brain is operating the way it is...

At any rate, good to be aboard.

It is a huge change but your body will get used to it.

I was on shakes only for my preop and only taking in like 500 calories a day..

It’s normal for your appetite to diminish during that time. I lost my appetite one week into my pre-op diet as well. I am now 7 weeks post op and I still have absolutely no appetite. I’m supposed to be eating 600 cal a day, but I can barely get to 400. I am literally forcing myself to eat every day. I spoke to my nutritionist—I had my surgery at blossom bariatrics in Vegas, and he said not to worry about it right now. He said I am still fairly new post op and this is very normal since I no longer have the hunger hormone. He assured me this will get better over time.

Thanks for the feedback. Day 8 post-op. I'm down 9 pounds from last Monday. Appetite is a nonissue, however I do find myself wishing for something to actually *eat* rather than drink, but I've got another week on full liquids before I can proceed to pureed.

I'm having no problems drinking copious amounts of liquids, so dehydration is not an issue. Surprisingly, even acidic drinks like Spicy Hot V8 are not causing me any discomfort, even if I drink them relatively quickly.

I had my first post-op visit yesterday and we talked about V8 (since it's not on the list of approved liquids), and they said as a substitute for a meal or snack, that's fine but not to overdo it, and once I proceed to pureed foods, they prefer me to have actual blended vegetables for fibre rather than juices.

In terms of calorie count, I'm at about 450-600 per day.

So at this point, things are chugging along as hoped.

Well I'm on day 13 preop diet no more shakes only clear liquid. The first week went well. But last 2 days I'm dying to chew something real. Chicken, bread, something. I haven't cheated, don't want to start this journey that way if I can make it. I'm hoping this doesn't continue through postoperative liquid diet.

Well made it through post op liquid diet. Since all things were going well I had a few pureed meals before the end of the full liquid stage. Small amounts of tuna and mayo blended. Ate slow made sure nothing hurt.