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Just cleared for surgery 5/21 freaking out a little well a lot.



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Ugh. So I just had my last pre op appointment. I’m cleared for VSG in 5/21. But now I’m freaking out a little.

So I’m a 40 yo guy 5’11. HW 287 CW 268. That’s all from my 1 month pre op diet. I’ve kept my daily calories to 900-1000 with at least 120g Protein. About half shakes and half food. It’s been hard but I’ve gotten used to it. But the thought of “when I’ll be able to eat real food” is always there. Fat Brain? Food addiction? Addiction runs in my family in both sides.

So I’ve lost 20 pounds, managed my work schedule, went through all the insurance hoops, paid out 5600 in program fees and copays/deductibles. My wife is very supportive. I’m on 3 blood pressure meds, have sleep apnea, high cholesterol. My father had a stroke at 55. My chest CT showed starting coronary artery disease. My weight is really effecting my health.

I hate how I look. I wear vests or sweaters over my dress shirts because I hate how my gut makes my shirts untuck and look sloppy.

I have 4 sweet children. The love how I cook and always say we should open a restaurant called “Big Fat Daddies”. They are being sweet but I hate being seen as Big Fat Daddy.

My weight had always been a issue but until the last 7-8 years I’ve kept it somewhat in check. I stayed right at the top of my “height weight” band in the Navy and passed all my physical fitness tests as a firefighter and paramedic. But over the last 8 years things have gotten out of control.

But now that this is real and Surgery is Mon morning I’m having second thoughts. Maybe I can stay on my “pre op” plan for another 60-80 pounds. Maybe I can keep it off this time. Of course as soon as I left my surgeon I went out for lunch and had a Mac and cheese and a cupcake for desert. I’m nauseous and ashamed of my weakness. But I’m afraid of parting ways with the lifestyle of indulgence that I enjoy despite how sick it’s making me and limiting my ability to enjoy life.

I’m sorry this really is an emotional dump. I’m just really filled with conflicting emotions.

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It's okay to be super conflicted. Many people find comfort in food. Though my weight gain was medical, I didn't help it by eating chocolate all the time that's for sure. As someone who also loves to cook, this was hard on me as well. I make delicious homemade bread that I now won't be able to eat. I just started baking a few months ago and was making some crazy awesome Cookies and deliciously pretty cakes that my family are now all constantly demanding... and I can't eat any of it. It's hard, its a mind f***. BUT it's okay.

I've found new recipes to try. New angles to come in at. I am addicted to my spiralizer and making veggie Pasta. (although I am now 2 days post-op so I won't be eating THAT for a month or so!) The true trick is to divert your obsession into something healthier until you can work through your food issues.

Food is a wonderful thing, and life is too short to not enjoy it. But for the next several months, you life should be about you reaching a level of health that will allow you to open that restaurant, instead saying "Big Daddy's Bistro" haha :)

So moral of the story, its okay to feel emotional and want to Celebrate a few food funerals. But just remember that your health trumps all the food highs. Good luck with your surgery, and good luck forging a newer and greater path for you and your family!

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this is the best decision you`ve taken, it is a life changer, i had my sleeve done on March 5 and i have lost 77 lbs to this day, dont give in to the fear cause at the end remember you are fighting a disease a disease that takes more life than any other, think about all the cool things you will be doing with your kids, think of it as a second chance at life.

i had Afib before getting sleeved and im glad to say my cardiologist just took me off my meds its a whole new me!

also once you start losing the weight your wife will definitely appreciate it, i feel like im 16 again hope you get what i mean! lol

Edited by MiltonP

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1 minute ago, MedicVSG said:

Ugh. So I just had my last pre op appointment. I’m cleared for VSG in 5/21. But now I’m freaking out a little.

So I’m a 40 yo guy 5’11. HW 287 CW 268. That’s all from my 1 month pre op diet. I’ve kept my daily calories to 900-1000 with at least 120g Protein. About half shakes and half food. It’s been hard but I’ve gotten used to it. But the thought of “when I’ll be able to eat real food” is always there. Fat Brain? food addiction? Addiction runs in my family in both sides.

So I’ve lost 20 pounds, managed my work schedule, went through all the insurance hoops, paid out 5600 in program fees and copays/deductibles. My wife is very supportive. I’m on 3 blood pressure meds, have sleep apnea, high cholesterol. My father had a stroke at 55. My chest CT showed starting coronary artery disease. My weight is really effecting my health.

I hate how I look. I wear vests or sweaters over my dress shirts because I hate how my gut makes my shirts untuck and look sloppy.

I have 4 sweet children. The love how I cook and always say we should open a restaurant called “Big Fat Daddies”. They are being sweet but I hate being seen as Big Fat Daddy.

My weight had always been a issue but until the last 7-8 years I’ve kept it somewhat in check. I stayed right at the top of my “height weight” band in the Navy and passed all my physical fitness tests as a firefighter and paramedic. But over the last 8 years things have gotten out of control.

But now that this is real and Surgery is Mon morning I’m having second thoughts. Maybe I can stay on my “pre op” plan for another 60-80 pounds. Maybe I can keep it off this time. Of course as soon as I left my surgeon I went out for lunch and had a Mac and cheese and a cupcake for desert. I’m nauseous and ashamed of my weakness. But I’m afraid of parting ways with the lifestyle of indulgence that I enjoy despite how sick it’s making me and limiting my ability to enjoy life.

I’m sorry this really is an emotional dump. I’m just really filled with conflicting emotions.

Man i am right there with you. If we back up to last july i am standing right in that same spot.

Hang tough and follow it thru. You will feel amazing when you dont have sleep apnea and find out what a good nights sleep is like again.

The blood pressure meds will drop by wayside.

The number 1 thing the sleeve does is make it possible to get the carb/sugar monkey off your back.

its only about 6 weeks till you can eat "normal" food again. Thats a very small time from the rest of your life.

Normal will be different and smaller but you will be happy with that trust me.

the food addiction thing is very hormone driven so the sleeve will take care of that part but you will be responsible for the mental changes to keep it going after the physical addiction is gone.

You will feel so much better and as the weight drops off you will find it easier to make the changes to keep it off.

You can still cook and make wonderful food you just have to expand your horizons about food to keep from expanding your waist line.

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7 minutes ago, allwet said:

expand your horizons about food to keep from expanding your waist line.

Trademark that! :)

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Some second thoughts are natural but science suggests that although you may lose the weight it'll come back on with interest. I'm the same age as you and 5'10", started at 317.5lb and now 2.5 wks post op am down to 277. I was on three BP meds, one has gone and the rest are reduced, now BP is 111/70 so will reduce more soon, my suspected (but not diagnosed) sleep apnea appears to have gone as I'm sleeping much better and actually feel refreshed when I wake. My back/ankle/knee pain is pretty much away. In short it's the best thing I've ever done for myself and probably will be for you too.

I can honestly say I've not been hungry since the op and whilst I enjoy eating nice flavours I can take or leave food and I would say my pre-op relationship with food was very similar to yours!

You won't regret it, keep us posted!

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20 hours ago, MedicVSG said:

But I’m afraid of parting ways with the lifestyle of indulgence that I enjoy

I think everyone goes through this.

But at the end of the day....Sadly, what it comes down to....is being more afraid of parting ways with your life, your health, your mobility, your ability to participate in the lives of the people you love.

I get thinking that it's not that bad yet... And I totally understand the idea of....I did this well with diet, why have the surgery?

Look at statistics. Research this question: What percentage of people keep weight off with diet and exercise alone compared to bariatric surgery?

It's not a magic bullet. You can still regain. You might not make goal.

But statistically? You will lose more weight, and you will keep more off permanently....with weight loss surgery.

It's your best hope. It gives you the best odds. It's a safe surgery. You can do this.

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You soon will start the path from Big Fat Daddy to Slim, Trim dude. Have you seen the shirts and hats that say. "(Old F*** formerly known as Stud Muffin"? I want me one that says" Sweet Chickie-Baby formerly known as Big Momma" Hey it could happen, I've got the motivation!😜👼

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On 5/16/2018 at 1:30 PM, MiltonP said:

this is the best decision you`ve taken, it is a life changer, i had my sleeve done on March 5 and i have lost 77 lbs to this day, dont give in to the fear cause at the end remember you are fighting a disease a disease that takes more life than any other, think about all the cool things you will be doing with your kids, think of it as a second chance at life.

i had Afib before getting sleeved and im glad to say my cardiologist just took me off my meds its a whole new me!

also once you start losing the weight your wife will definitely appreciate it, i feel like im 16 again hope you get what i mean! lol

Sounds good to me, I'm sure the wife wouldn't mind. Not to get too personal but there is no doubt that as weight goes up, performance goes down.

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On 5/17/2018 at 2:46 PM, Frustr8 said:

You soon will start the path from Big Fat Daddy to Slim, Trim dude. Have you seen the shirts and hats that say. "(Old F*** formerly known as Stud Muffin"? I want me one that says" Sweet Chickie-Baby formerly known as Big Momma" Hey it could happen, I've got the motivation!😜👼

Sounds like a plan.

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On 5/17/2018 at 9:45 AM, Creekimp13 said:

I think everyone goes through this.

But at the end of the day....Sadly, what it comes down to....is being more afraid of parting ways with your life, your health, your mobility, your ability to participate in the lives of the people you love.

I get thinking that it's not that bad yet... And I totally understand the idea of....I did this well with diet, why have the surgery?

Look at statistics. Research this question: What percentage of people keep weight off with diet and exercise alone compared to bariatric surgery?

It's not a magic bullet. You can still regain. You might not make goal.

But statistically? You will lose more weight, and you will keep more off permanently....with weight loss surgery.

It's your best hope. It gives you the best odds. It's a safe surgery. You can do this.

Thank you that really helps.

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Thanks everyone, that really helps. I think I'm getting over the jitters for now. Surgery is at 1100 on Monday morning so positive thoughts.

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