Rant: I had gastric sleeve surgery 12/2/2015. My highest weight was 307 pounds and my current weight is roughly 194 pounds. I moved to Florida late last year after my divorce and I have received the most attention I have ever gotten in my life. Guys would stare, give me a compliment or speak but never ask me out. A friend suggested I try online dating. I tried eHarmony, Plenty of Fish, Ok Cupid and Black People Meet. I made sure to have friends look at my profile so they could tell me if my online profile was decent or not. I do not talk provocative and my pictures are appropriate.

I have gotten rid of every profile except eHarmony, but as soon as my subscription ends, I will cancel that too. I have gone on a few dates and the men who ask me out are nothing but freaking liars! They are either conceited, selfish, demanding or downright just looking for sex. My profile clearly states I am looking for a relationship, yet guys would ask to exchange pictures without even asking me for my name. And the guys who say they want a relationship on their profile eventually show their true colors and in the end you find out that they're just looking for someone to jump in bed with. Matter of fact, men would ask me to come visit them or if they could visit me, and that's just after communicating on the first day. WTF??? Are you not concerned about diseases??? The last guy who sent me a message on POF (Plenty of Fish) asked to meet him for drinks and was incapable of holding an decent conversation. I told him it was obvious he was looking for a hook-up and that's not me, and I wished him the best.

I have gotten to the point where I am no longer interested in dating. Some people has found the love of their life online but I don't think it's for me. I have accepted the fact that being single is the way to go, that way I won't have to bother with being disappointed.

Ok, rant over. LOL.

With that being said, I am looking for friends, just people to hang out with. Anyone want to just have coffee? I am a sucker for a good coffee, Cappuccino or latte. If you're in South Florida, let's grab a cup, as a friend

Honestly I meet the nicest guys on Tinder

Well, you could look at it as glass-half-empty, but I would look at it as you are attracting multiple different people so you must be doing something right. In other words, you have that hot-cha-cha, ya? That is half the battle!!

Seriously though, I am old school, I feel the best relationships are those that start with friendships and it is probably going to be a bit hard finding a friend on a dating site, though there are several people on here who have done just that. Any possible prospects at work/school/church?

11 hours ago, OutsideMatchInside said:

Honestly I meet the nicest guys on Tinder

Lol really? I've been told Tinder was worse than POF. And I didn't think anything was worse than POF... those dudes are disgusting

2 hours ago, Navigating the Wilderness said:

Well, you could look at it as glass-half-empty, but I would look at it as you are attracting multiple different people so you must be doing something right. In other words, you have that hot-cha-cha, ya? That is half the battle!!

Seriously though, I am old school, I feel the best relationships are those that start with friendships and it is probably going to be a bit hard finding a friend on a dating site, though there are several people on here who have done just that. Any possible prospects at work/school/church?

Nope, no work/church prospects. I honestly have just given up. No more online dating for me. I am old school too But no one wants to be friends first anymore. They want to sleep with you first, THEN decide if they want to date you. It's so backwards.

I made the best decision - just not to be in a relationship - period. I am happier than I have ever been and I get to focus on myself 100% of the time. Since my decision 4 years ago, I can say I have been lonely once. I watch my friends constantly struggling to find a relationship, not just a good one, just a decent one. Listening to them is entertainment for me, but just confirms my decision. Not everyone wants to be alone, I get that, but for me it has allowed me to blossom and really enjoy life without any drama. Best of luck!

1 hour ago, Lexigurl82 said:

Lol really? I've been told Tinder was worse than POF. And I didn't think anything was worse than POF... those dudes are disgusting

Tinder is better because they can't contact you unless you like them. So you control who can contact you unlike POF. Also you have to have Facebook to use Tinder so there are less fake profiles on Tinder and fewer married men, IMO.

I have never got one dirty message or nasty comment on Tinder because I am pre-screening them.

I'll never use POF again.

If you are pretty and photograph well, Tinder is like shooting fish in a barrel.

Eharmony is too slow, not enough men to choose from. Give Tinder a whirl you might be surprised. I wish I had tried it sooner.

I am probably not much help as I have been married 25 years...lol. I think the best relationships happen when you least expect it. I believe it will find you if you quit searching so hard!

I met my husband online... it does work, sometimes.

Don't give up !!!!

This advice may have already been given, but here goes. Join some hobby or trade groups that might interest you. Like dancing, fishing, biking, something at the local park district. Take a class at a community college in woodworking, pottery, computers, anything. Learn to golf, ride a motorcycle, archery, ride horses. The goal here is to just meet more people, expand your network so to speak.

When I stopped looking for a date, he practically landed on my doorstep - 21 years ago and I had been married before for 18 years, divorced, had 4 teenagers, and all. I stopped looking and started having fun.

I suggest staying away from the free dating sites.
I met my wife on match.com so I can say it does work.
Having said that, online dating can get to be bothersome after a while.
I was getting pretty jaded with it and then I met my wife.
I am sorry you are having such a bad experience.

If any ladies are remotely interested in nerds, the local game store is a wonderful place to meet single men. I'm talking Dungeons and Dragons, Magic the Gathering, etc.

Most of those stores have tables set up for players to play in store. There will be weekly groups that can be joined for little or no money.

Gamers are generally honest, real people. Many are socially awkward, but it means there is no "game playing".

Met my hubby at a D&D game 18 years ago, and owned a game store for 4 years. Best job I've ever had (although there isn't much money in it).

On 4/6/2017 at 9:03 PM, OutsideMatchInside said:

Honestly I meet the nicest guys on Tinder

Holy **** my sides dude...

Edited April 21, 20179 yr by PatientEleventyBillion

4 hours ago, PatientEleventyBillion said:

Holy **** my sides dude...

I'm serious. You can pre-screen them so it is easy to weed out the losers.

No visible tats - check

Quality pictures without women or kids - check

College education - check

Career (not just a job) - Check

Nice Smile/Teeth - Check

On those alone you have narrowed it down to the top 1 percent. I get take on very nice REAL first dates, not coffee dates.

Tinder allows you to screen them the most, so it is really the best option if you are pretty and take good pictures.

On ‎4‎/‎21‎/‎2017 at 1:13 PM, OutsideMatchInside said:

I'm serious. You can pre-screen them so it is easy to weed out the losers.

No visible tats - check

Quality pictures without women or kids - check

College education - check

Career (not just a job) - Check

Nice Smile/Teeth - Check

On those alone you have narrowed it down to the top 1 percent. I get take on very nice REAL first dates, not coffee dates.

Tinder allows you to screen them the most, so it is really the best option if you are pretty and take good pictures.

Why is a coffee date not a real date? Does someone have to spend larger sums of money to make it a "real date"?

Where we live there are free parks and museums and outdoor events almost every single day. You don't have to spend money on a first date. I would rather walk in a park than have coffee.

Guys that invite you on coffee dates are intellectually lazy.

Coffee dates are for cowards. The kid of guys that ask you out for coffee are the kind of guys that are going to take you to dinner and to the movies or something else equally boring.