My husband is a wonderful and supportive man; HOWEVER, I can't look for him for affirmation. I've lost 53 lbs since September with only 39 more to go. I've gone from a size 18 to a size 12, YET he says he can't really tell a difference! How can this be?!?! He says it's because he lives with me and sees me every day. I know this is an issue only within myself, as I can't expect others to fill my self-esteem gaps but I truly was hoping for positive reinforcement from him.

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You're in the army, right? Tell him his assessment is a Charlie Foxtrot, and he needs new intel ASAP. If he doesn't improve, things will go Tango Utah.

I agree, it is because you see each other everyday. Believe me, he will notice soon enough...I bet you look beautiful!

Roger that, LittleBill. lol I'm retired Army now but I still know how to bark commands.

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Roger that, LittleBill. lol I'm retired Army now but I still know how to bark commands.

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Mrs. LittleBill was never in the army, but she is pretty good at that command thing too. I get myself in trouble on a regular basis when she asks me how something looks, and I say "Fine" before I even look over. That is self inflicted, of course.

You're in the army, right? Tell him his assessment is a Charlie Foxtrot, and he needs new intel ASAP. If he doesn't improve, things will go Tango Utah.

That is nicer than telling her to tell him he is a Alpha Sierra Sierra Hotel Oscar Lima Echo.

Can you be honest and let him know how you feel?

Is there possibly insecurity on his part because of the weight you lost so far and plan to lose?

Keep up the excellent weight loss effort!

Maybe he doesn't want to tell you how much of a difference he sees because he wants you to keep getting finer and finer most people will pick back up bad habits when others tell them what they see

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Are you wearing a lot of your old clothes? Sounds like a trip to Vicki's is in order. He'll notice then. [emoji160]

LoL I've lost 50 lbs since September, and all my soccer team mates haven't noticed anything! Even my work mates. When people see you everyday, they won't notice till a 'dramatic' body feature appears/ disappears

When people see you everyday, they won't notice till a 'dramatic' body feature appears/ disappears

That's illegal in most states.

If he sees you everyday then it can be difficult. I would make a before and after picture for yourself, put it on the fridge for your own motivation and I'll bet when he sees it side by side he'll take back his statement!

It's like time lapse photography. If you sat in your yard in front of a rose bush, you'd hardly notice the changes of a new rose budding. But only go out and look at the bush every few days and the change would be easily noticeable. Nothing one day, a bud the next time you checked, then a rose in no time!

So I think the answer is, banish him from the house for a while and THEN he'd see!

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When people see you everyday, they won't notice till a 'dramatic' body feature appears/ disappears

That's illegal in most states.

Edited December 27, 20169 yr by Middus

It took a while for my husband to really notice/acknowledge my loss. I am just about 3 months post op and down 58 pounds. Getting some new clothes helped. When I was wearing my size 18, it was tough to tell. Now my 14s make it a little easier to see a difference. I am floored how few sizes nearly 60 pounds equate to. ????

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