Fat Acceptance Movement - how do you feel?

[needtorecover 574]

I have mixed feelings on it myself. On the one hand, I want everyone to feel comfortable in their own skin. I don't think anyone should feel ashamed of their size. Everyone should be able to find flattering, comfortable clothes in their size. We should educate people who have never had a weight problem that obesity is not a choice. We should fight the lazy/clumsy/stupid stereotypes of obese individuals... all that I support.

But there is something about it that rubs me the wrong way... I think it's the push to ignore medical advice and tell doctors they're being fat-shamed for being told to lose weight.

I'm just curious. Do you think it's ultimately harmful or helpful to obese folks?

Discuss

[JamieLogical 8,684]

This is a tough one. I think that everyone should have the right to feel good in their skin. And I think that society as a whole should be more accepting and accommodating of all body types. But I agree that a line needs to be drawn when it comes to the medical side of the issue. I think it helps to put it in the frame of reference of any other medical disorder or disability. It's not acceptable for people in society to make fun of or look down on those with disabilities, but it's perfectly acceptable for doctors to try to TREAT those disabilities.

[Cervidae 2,389]

The fat acceptance movement is a lot like the feminism movement in that a lot of people have utter misconceptions about what the movement is actually about and why it exists. Much like the crazy people who call themselves feminists while attacking men, saying we should just kill off all the men, saying the men are inferior, etc are not ACTUALLY feminists, people who truly believe that being fat is healthy and that all doctors are just being hateful and discriminatory are not actually fat activists.

The point of the fat acceptance movement is the same point as the broader body positivity movement: it doesn't matter if you weigh 800 pounds and literally can't move off your bed, it doesn't matter if you have made yourself unhealthy with poor choices or if you are making no move whatsoever to lose weight. Every person deserves to be treated like a human being, with dignity and respect, end of story. Fat acceptance is all about treating fat people like they are humans instead of the often appalling way we are often treated, ways that are still socially acceptable and that need to change, NOW. The point is, no one has a right to judge you or treat you poorly because of your body because it's your body, not theirs, and no one gets a say unless you want them to. These misguided people who stubbornly tell themselves that fat acceptance is about pretending to be healthy and thinking fat is better are just that, misguided. I can't really blame them, in some ways. Being treated like less of a person because of how you look is just absolutely wrong and ridiculous, and doesn't serve to actually help people.

No true body positivist would ever ignore medical advise just because they are hurt and offended by the truth, just like no actual feminist would say that men are inferior. There are idiot radicals in every movement, but what's important to take away from it is the core message.

[Djmohr 6,965]

I think fat shaming is ridiculous regardless of who is doing it.

My mother n law (when she was alive) was the queen of fat shaming. She would figure out ways to make you feel like a big fat slob. For example, she would buy my husband a birthday gift that was 2 or 3 sizes too small. She would then ask, will it fit? Hubby would respond and say, no I am not a medium I am a 2xl. She would say well them lose weight. (True story).

I collect wee forest folk mice. One year for Christmas she bought me a chubby little mouse standing in his bathrobe on a scale. She proceeded to tell me it reminded her of me. Really? B#%+€!

then there is a right way,

For me it was my nephrologist who suggested I consider WLS. He did this very respectfully but at the same time very sternly helping me understand that if I kept on my current trend I would be looking at dialysis and ultimately a kidney transplant.

There is a right way and a wrong way to deliver that message. Thankfully he delivered it the right way and I listened immediately.

I remember being very angry at my PCP for not having that same conversation with me before I got to that point. I had no idea that my kidney function had been so bad for so long, when my nephrologist pulled up my chart and showed me the downward trend was chronic and had been going on for years, I really got pissed that my PCP never said a word until I was at stage 3. Not 1 word. I spoke with her about it and told her that my nephrologist was my hero for helping me see the light. My PCP then told me she really should have been the one to direct me there and felt bad but she did not know how to deliver the message appropriately.

That was when I changed PCPs.

[baylyy 9]

It's funny actually, I was thinking about this the other day.

I feel pretty conflicted over the whole thing.

I am just starting my wls journey and before I was a big supporter of these types of movements (no pun intended lol).

On instagram, I followed all sorts of plus size power houses and truly inspiring women and then I started my journey and I'm now following over 200 wls patients, workout pages and health pages.

So there are times now where I'm scrolling and looking at all these before and afters and I'm like oh yeaa I'm so excited to be on the same path and then i see a post that's the biggest greasiest pizza and it's like #luvyurself #treatyurselfcauseyouthaqueen

It's an interesting argument anyways. Gonna have to follow along this one

Ps

If you're on the instaa then follow me (Tbh nothing exciting yet but once the ball is rolling in my process I'm posting it all ) @baylyygail

[Djmohr 6,965]

Oh, by the way. Said mother n law was obese herself!

[Julie norton 2,850]

It has surely opened my eyes to pictures that were posted elsewhere with no other redeeming value, except to show someone's huge girth over their pants... That is plain fat shaming, and I won't comment or pass it along!

Slowly, some attitudes are changing????

[LipstickLady 25,681]

I've not read all the replies and I will when I have more time, but my initial response is that the whole "movement" is ridiculous. Bullying or discrimination of EVERY flavor should talked about but I do think Tumblr and other social media has created some very special snowflakes that think they are entitled to feel "shamed" or "bullied" over the smallest of slights instead of just manning up and moving on. They have completely watered down the meaning of both words taking away from the terms when they really matter.

There is a BIG difference between told you can't do something because of your size and expecting special allowances (ie two seats on a plane for the price of one) because of your size. When I was at my heaviest, I expected to pay extra for my bigger clothes. I didn't demand that amusement parks make special accommodations because I couldn't fit in all the attractions. I knew trendier styles would come with a big price tag and would be few and far between.

[Inner Surfer Girl 12,015]

I haven't thought a lot about it but here are some initial thoughts.

As a movement, I would guess that people who are active in it find community and belonging with people who have similar experiences. We all need a "tribe".

As being fat was and is just one fact about me, I have never identified myself or allowed other's to define me as just a fat woman.

I have so many interests and talents that have nothing to do with my weight and body size that I have never been self-limiting when it comes to friends and social situations.

[jj7481 363]

There is a delicate balance that must be maintained by medical providers. Fat shaming is abhorrent in any fashion. Most of the time this this seen as a societal issue. Medical providers have an obligation to recommend the healthiest lifestyle for their patients regardless if the patient takes their advice or not (i.e. stop smoking, etc.). In my experience my physicians have provided me this information and not fat shamed me.

[Cervidae 2,389]

@@baylyy the whole point is that whether you're a fat person who is working out and eating healthy and trying to lose weight or a fat person who likes pizza and eats it every daya nd is slowly killing yourself, you deserve to be treated like a human being.

And as a general comment about medical professionals and the fat acceptance movement: the connection between the movement and medicine/doctors is that there's no denying that doctors often sort of just brush aside other possible health issues when someone is overweight. It's common for a doctor to take one look at the number on the scale and automatically chalk up all symptoms to obesity. The movement is trying to say "hey, yes, weight can and does cause health issues, but assuming a fat person is automatically unhealthy is utter idiocy, and it needs to change." The fact is even medical professionals can be discriminatory towards obese people. And that's a big, big problem.

[Margie122 845]

I haven't had time to read all the replies but this is my .02

I don't understand why people feel it's ok to shame, bully, humiliate, tease, or be downright cruel to overweight/obese people. It's like because we/they are fat we must be lazy or immoral or stupid.

If people could just treat each other with kindness and respect...!

Sorry about the rant but it seems like fat people and smokers are the last two acceptable groups to insult, etc.

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

Fat acceptance movements don't cancel out some inconvenient truths:

1. Healthy, fat young people turn into fatter, unhealthy middle-aged people and morbidly obese, sick people who die decades before than their natural lifespan due to obesity comorbidities like diabetes, hypertension/strokes, cardiovascular disease, fatty liver disease and some forms of cancer.

2. As every single WLS patient who has reached maintenance knows, the quality of life for morbidly obese people is awful, compared to the quality of life for people who are of normal weight.

Those facts don't justify insulting anyone -- fat people or others (like smokers) who actively contribute to their demise. They should be supported, not insulted.

And venturing into controversial territory, when I was obese I found absolutely nothing acceptable about being overweight or obese. Therefore, I can't get excited about a movement that celebrates obesity. Thank God, I finally reached the point (hit bottom) where my own obesity became so disabling and appalling that I sought WLS.

What a freakin' relief!

[careya123 260]

My PCP then told me she really should have been the one to direct me there and felt bad but she did not know how to deliver the message appropriately.

That PCP needs a new career! What's the point of going to the doctor if s/he can't tell you the truth? Unbelievable.

[gowalking 10,790]

Thank God, I finally reached the point (hit bottom) where my own obesity became so disabling and appalling that I sought WLS.

What a freakin' relief!

What Ann said. Amen sister!!