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The fear of regain is REAL!



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@@Debbieduck4 Thank you! Truthfully the first once she sent grossed me out because I could barely eat as it was. I refuse to go off track and even when I start to I correct my direction! Thank you for the continued support. I will need it for a loooong time!

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@@Elode I also have been noticing what other people put into their mouths, and it's disgusting. People eat SO fast!! Shoveling in the food, and no conversation, no relaxation to just enjoy the moment. I am so grateful for this surgery. I am not as young as you are, I am 53, but I feel as young as you. My knees used to hurt, and my feet....OH MY FEET!! No more. I feel so amazing, and I still have a ways to go to hit my goal. The past 6 months since my surgery has flown by, and I get to see my family who criticized me LAST Thanksgiving for even considering WLS. They told me I would DIE. They told me I would FAIL. I'm looking forward to seeing their faces when I am skipping in with my casserole of mashed cauliflower while rocking my size 10 Wrangler 100% cotton jeans (I detest Lycra in my jeans!) and "KC Royals" T-shirt, instead of my size 20W S-T-R-E-T-C-H jeans and A-line tunic in a horrible pattern (but it was all that fit). I am so glad that we have our little community here for support. And I know you won't judge me for rambling. :)

That was a great post!

I too, love this little community we gotz here!

I don't know what I'd do without all of you on Bariatricpal!

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@@Kindle Thank you for sharing! I plan on talking with her over thanksgiving. She says she's going to talk to her PA about it when she goes back in. She sounds like she wants to do it and expresses interest but then never does. I think she's scared, scared of being put to sleep, scared she won't be able to eat ect... The normal fears most of us have. I though seeing me go through it would calm her but I just don't know? She thinks she's doing good on Atkins and she has before but gained it all back. She's retired now and volunteers at her local Nursing home 3 times a week. She calls bingo and sings to them. She always bakes them Cookies and breads every week because they don't get that kind of stuff and many don't have visitors so she feels like they need that kind of love. Problem is when she's doing this "Atkins" diet plan she always derails by eating some of what she's cooking. She and my father like to go to the Chinese buffet in her tiny town to "celebrate" everything. It's a vicious cycle and she's defiantly a food addict in denial. Well I say denial bit she knows it's wrong because she tells me she shouldn't but she "doesn't eat that much". Yes, yes she does. Her PA has expressed concern with her BP and legs. She's short with really big legs and her little feet are always swollen with pitting edema. She can't stand on her feet very long. It's sad and I worry about her. I know and she knows that she will have massive amounts of lose skin if she ever does. She says she's not worried about that. She's been married to my father for 37 years. My dad called me the other night and is worried about her. He says she has to roll back and forth to get out of bed and you have to give her your hand when she needs to get out of a chair to help her up. He's afraid she's going to die in her sleep. That's always been her fear. He depends on her and always has. I just pray that she will be blessed with the surgery. I hope when she sees me in a couple weeks she makes up her mind to go through with it and start the process for real. Don't even get me started on my brother! He's just about where she is and he's only 37.

@@Joz31 Hey that sounds like fun!!! I'm outside Springfield between Springfield and Branson.

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I too thank you Elode and everyone else who has posted your struggles here. I am struggling right now as well. My surgery was 06/24/15 and have been a very slow loser. I lost 40lbs before the sleeve and 42 after and its almost been 5 months. The last 3 weeks I have been eating too many calories and cant seem to stay in the 800-900 range but have been 1000-1200 range or there about. It totally scares me. I have a sweet tooth and been craving sugar but have not given in because I am scared to death I wont be able to stop. Several weeks ago I gave in to EVOL Parmasean and truffle mac and cheese. I ate it on Friday and then again Saturday nights. I told myself that was it and then had more the following Saturday night and then one more time after that and I told my best friend about it and told her that was it and I would not have any more. I wanted to be accountable to someone in hopes it would help me and it did! I didn't buy anymore this last weekend and I have talked to myself about what I could do differently to keep my calories down since I am only about halfway. This whole episode has scared me to death. It made me realize that it would be so very easy to let go. Now that the holidays are here I am scared I will give in to the sugar monster within and I wont be able to get rid of it!! lol

Anyway...thank you everyone for your stories! It helps to know I am not alone in this struggle. And it helps to know there are people like Elode and the rest of you who have so much strength and determination and that you are winning the fight!

So thank you all so very much and thanks for letting me vent my fears and struggles. :)

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I have a tremendous fear of regaining the weight that I've lost. I was going through some recent pictures of the 3 family members of mine that have had WLS. Two had Gastric bypass and the (blonde pink shirt) had sleeve surgery 6 months before I did. All have regained weight, they don't look like they even had surgery. None of them ever reached any goal. These are current post (last week). The part that aggravates me is the excuses they come up with and the comments about how I'm just "lucky" that I lost so "easily". I see all the food post. It's not my place to call them out on the food they are eating. Seeing this can be discouraging at times but most of the time it makes me want to do anything possible NOT to end up like that. Maybe I'm wrong for using them as my motivation to succeed but it does scare me. I never know what to say when the remarks come in about how well I've done and all my so called "luck". What do you do?! I keep these pictures as my reminder of what can/will happen if I don't stick with my plan. Which just helped me stop at 6 1/2 Cheetos! Of course I've blocked all identity from the pictures for their privacy. Its not "luck" it's a constant "just say NO!" Attitude I have to food. It's not easy, it's never going to be easy. That's my reality. It's just a tool nothing more and nothing less.

Random question. ..how the heck was she able to eat all that food with a sleeve (girl in the pink)?

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@@kisha585 I wondered that too. It amazes me how people can do that. I work with some women who never lost anything after their surgeries, and I just don't understand!

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@@Elode I am in the same boat you are when it comes to my mom. We are both nurses too like you and your mom. My mom is 66 years old and she probably weighs about 280-300 pounds. She has always been so active and never let her weight hold her back. Now that she is getting older it is catching up with her. She gets short of breath so easily. She is unable to walk long distances either. So when our whole family goes on trips she ends up staying in the hotel rather than walk around.

I want her to have to same sense of freedom that weight loss has given me. It is hard to see her suffer.

I will say a little prayer that our moms gain a path to renewed path to health.

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@@Licia'sjourney Its hard because food still taste good!! At least you realized what you were doing. It takes a ton of willpower to say NO! Like I've said I have done some wacky stuff like throwing things off my porch, letting the dog lick them and throwing them away. It doesn't even matter if it belongs to me or not at this point. My family knows how I feel and there are plenty of cabinets they can put their junk in that is out of my sight. If They can't give me that respect then they will lose the junk. It's as simple as that.

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@@kisha585 If your talking about her plate I can't say that she did because I wasn't there. That was a recent FB post. Her mother called me because she was worried about her eating behaviors. I see her food post on FB all the time. Eating Breakfast pizzas, razzel dazzle pie (whatever the heck that is) chocolate pie, Apple pecan bread, Burger King.....these are all just from this week. I don't have to know exactly how much she's eating to tell that she's screwing up. Heck I didn't even need her mom to tell me that the proof is in the pictures.

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@@glitter eyes Backatcha! It's hard to watch. It's almost like a reversal of roles. I feel like I'm the mom and need to protect her. Prayers for your mom!

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I've found out two types of foods are very easy to pass, they're chips of every kind and Cookies, they probably over-indulged in these two types of Snacks, or they drink a LOT of non-diet soda/sugary drinks, otherwise I'm confused as to why they'd gain weight, my stomach is roughly at 5-6Oz capacity at 8 months, I've eaten Chimichangas, daily, for a week and I did not gain weight (these were 5Oz microwave chimichangas - around 4 a day), in fact I lost weight because my caloric intake was actually lower than 1000 calories, the only drinks I had were Coke Zero and Tea with Splenda.

I've also abused some sweets every now and then and still my weight keeps going down, currently changed to a 36 pants size last week.

There's something they're not telling you and I bet it has something to do with sugar.

Edited by Cujucuyo

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Keep in mind, @Cujocuyo that the first year or so is considered the "honeymoon period" where the majority of weight lost is hormonal. Once that period is over the majority of weight loss (or maintenance) is up to you.

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Keep in mind, @Cujocuyo that the first year or so is considered the "honeymoon period" where the majority of weight lost is hormonal. Once that period is over the majority of weight loss (or maintenance) is up to you.

And to piggy back on that, your restriction wanes a little as time goes by, also. Instead of eating a few bites of a fattening food, some may be able to eat a small plate of fattening food. Although we will never be able to eat near as much as we could before, as time goes on, even a little more can add up to many calories consumed over a day or week. That's why it's imperative we set up healthy eating habits early out for when the time comes where restriction is less and hunger returns.

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Thanks for this thread, @@Elode -- and thanks to all who've posted here. Some sweet posts.

Odd as it sounds, it's motivating for me to watch some people waste their sleeves. But it's beyond weird that some WLS patients revel in their self-abuse so much that they publicize it daily on Facebook. I can't wrap my head around that.

If I go down I'll go down fighting all the way -- not posting pix on FB of me drinking Mountain Dew.

P.S. And in response to the sole "fat shaming" comment made earlier on this thread, I interpret @@Elode's OP and her other comments as a protest against those who "skinny shame" those of us who work hard to be successful after WLS, whether our success comes hard or easy and whether we're currently losing, maintaining or gaining. In my humble opinion, it's the effort that we put out that deserves respect. If you've had WLS, but have given up the struggle, so be it. But when you start trying to bring others down who are still fighting for their health then you deserve all the scorn you get.

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This has nothing to do with "luck". Although I can't eat much, depending on what I eat, I can easily rack up the calories! And to reiterate, by no means am I a saint, but I am cognizant of my intake. Motivation is what you make it and I don't blame you one bit!

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