Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Talking myself out of surgery



Recommended Posts

"What if I fail" mainly goes through my head.

I've been on this pre pre op diet since September and was doing really well, lost 13 lbs and this weekend I slipped up due to stress and I'm afraid I'll just continue to slip up.

We're all human. We all slip up. Then you get back up and move on. We are often brainwashed with the "all or nothing" mentality from a lifetime of yo yo dieting. This new life is not like any other "diet" I've been on. It's a lifestyle. It's choices. And every day is a new opportunity to do it "right". The cheese Danish I had for Breakfast yesterday doesn't make me a failure. Just human. And today I had an egg with salsa for Breakfast. New day. New choices.

There will still be stresses to deal with, and learning new coping mechanisms is vital to your long term success. So take as much time as you need to prepare for the mental games that await. Don't feel pressured into surgery until you are ready.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am scared of thought of possibly failing. But what scares me more is what happens if I don't try and stay obese. How long before I have a heart attack? How old will I live to be if I don't have this surgery?

Those thoughts are what made me make up my mind to preceed with the surgery

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wish you all the best. I am one week after you. Please keep in touch. We will do great!!!

@@HopeandAgony

Will definitely keep in touch!!!

Edited by brandylc

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

We were told our approval would be good for a year. There are several in my graduating class who have yet to have surgery. I would check with your program and see if they have the same option. That way it would give you a proper amount of time to think it over without losing the time and effort you've already invested. Best of luck whatever you decide!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

About perfectionism and all-or-nothing thinking and letting worry about failure paralyze us ...

... you may wish to read this worthwhile piece on Wikipedia about these very issues:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perfectionism_(psychology)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

"What if I fail" mainly goes through my head.

I've been on this pre pre op diet since September and was doing really well, lost 13 lbs and this weekend I slipped up due to stress and I'm afraid I'll just continue to slip up.

Here's your chance to change that habit. You can see that you slipped up & identify that it was due to stress. So make that "what if" a " what could I do instead?" Try to come up with 2 - 3 options. Put them in your phone, write them on your mirror, stick them on the fridge. The next stressful event, look at them and choose one. That's how you change behaviors

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I kind of want to go ahead and start my pre op liquid diet so when they call with my approval I can get scheduled sooner. I know this is what I want and need. But this is what I always do, my husband says I "hold onto stuff too long" and change my mind.

I'm just ready.

Now that I've jumped through the hoops I'm just ready.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I kind of want to go ahead and start my pre op liquid diet so when they call with my approval I can get scheduled sooner. I know this is what I want and need. But this is what I always do, my husband says I "hold onto stuff too long" and change my mind.

I'm just ready.

Now that I've jumped through the hoops I'm just ready.

Good for you!!! Keeping you in my thoughts!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You shouldn't be "talking yourself" into it or out of it. This is a very serious move that involves looking at yourself objectively, looking at the facts of your history, and judging for yourself the prospects from others that have gone before you. Once you have made a decision based on those factors, you should not be trying to make up arguments that steer it in any direction...not even as to what procedure you would like to have. If you have reservations based on something in your life, that is perfectly legitimate and needs to be thought over...it does not constitute a mind game and certainly doesn't amount to talking yourself into or out of anything. Best of luck whichever way you go!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wanna know what the greatest feeling in the world is? Its being able to do anything you want and knowing your not to heavy to do it!! If I could have changed anything, I would have given that gift to myself much sooner. Best of luck on whatever you decide, but you will not regret being able to seize everything life has to offer!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×