Hello and good morning my friends. Welcome to Banders #7. So, I guess I'll start it off by saying how grateful I am today and every day for the new lease on life that I have. I walked to the office today from the train station. That was something I couldn't do before the surgery. I always say how light I feel and I realized it's not a state of mind, but a physical reality. We are weighed down by the excess weight and all that goes with it. When we don't rumble and jumble as we walk, our steps are lighter. I was listening to my ipod and started to dance a little as I was walking. I'm sure I looked ridiculous, but who cares? When one is thin, even looking ridiculous seems OK.

I am grateful for my for my beautiful grandson who I was able to tuck into my lap last Saturday morning so we could play while Mommy and Daddy got to sleep in a bit. I'm grateful that I fit anywhere and everywhere. No more worrying if I will break a chair, or be able to navigate a booth at the restaurant, or walk down a narrow aisle without having to suck it all in just to get past someone/something.

I'm grateful for my health. I take alot of pills, but many of them are supplements and not prescription for chronic ailments. I'm grateful that I can walk again...that I can swim, bike, climb, and yes....enjoy sex. I am surprised at how flexible I can be now that I'm thin.

I'm grateful that I earn enough money that I can indulge my new found love of shopping. I really think I'm one of the best dressed ladies in the office these days...and I know I've upped the game for others. I am definitely seeing more dresses than I did a year ago.

I'm grateful to Alex for having this site available...and I'm grateful to all the folks on it who are part of my success. I know I would not have been as successful as I have been if not for all of you. I talk about things here that I don't talk to anyone else about. You all know the struggles of being fat, and immobile, and feeling like a failure regardless of what we've accomplished..and I know now how much we 'hidden' people have accomplished. It's helping me to not turn that self hatred towards others still struggling with obesity. It also reminds me that I will always struggle with obesity. Under this thin person still lurks the fat girl. She is the one who whispers in my ear all the time that I'm not worthy of the good things out there and I should just order a pizza and eat the whole thing. She and I clash daily and it's why I still go every Tuesday to the therapist who listens and helps me to navigate this new world I inhabit.

Well...I think I've posted enough for today. Feel free to comment on the above, or share your stories, or say hi, or just lurk. Enjoy your day today...enjoy the upcoming holiday, and looking forward to a wonderfully robust Banders #7 thread.

Liz

Thank You Sweetie.

Thanks cyber friends

Off to get more boxes....

And again... Too much stuff

My doc said " don't leave everything for your kids to have to go through". I'm taking his advice ...

Taking a break from moving by attending a wedding. Mother of bride is a florist and it smelled and looked spectacular!! 50 acres of redwoods and meadows and a train that circled around.

Had a fabulous time.

Needed it... Back to boxing up for the final time.

Julie...Sharpie. Hang in there ladies. Some days are harder than others. I know...today would have been our 39th wedding anniversary. He's gone longer than we were married but I never forget this day...nor does my sister, bless her.

Julie, you look stunning!

JustWatchMe

I'm one pound away from the 170s. This week? Maybe? Crossing my fingers...

Edited to add: 179.0 this morning!

I've been wondering where Debbie is. She always posted and has been very quiet lately. I'm just hoping she's busy with other things...but I don't like that she just dropped off the forum. Anyone hear from her?

Liz

I hope she's okay. I stopped checking the forum when the notifications got fried. It became too difficult to keep up without them. I have them working again but I basically just check this thread a couple times a week.

JustWatchMe

Good point Liz

Debbie usually posts about summer bands and such. She has been quiet lately.

I've grown fond of this group of veteran banders and hope not to lose any !

Hi every one -- just popping on for a quick check-in. Julie, sending best wishes for your move. Wonderful seeing your picture and glad you got a break from packing, shedding, moving. It must be such as poignant time for you -- sending extra love your way. And you, too, Sharpie. We have all been through a lot together on this forum. Just Watch Me -- 170s, YIPPEE! So happy for you! That is great news.

I have a rich outdoor life at this time of year and that is soul-fulfilling as well as good exercise. Gardened early this morning and now just back from a morning walk at the lake and settling in to get some work done at the computer. The peonies are out right now and the air is heavy with their scent. We've had one spectacular day after the next.

Weight-wise I am having trouble budging the scale, but I am not too troubled by that. I know what I have to do and just have to want to buckle down and do it. I would benefit greatly from a five-day juice fast or all-liquids with Protein shakes might be a good way to go. Will have to find a place on the calendar for that as it's a very social time of year with visitors, little trips, a wedding, etc. The good news is I feel good about my body. Yesterday I ironed and I'm happy to have clothes that fit and are fun to wear. No more shame and embarrassment.

Time to go check and see what's happening on the forum as a whole. This thread is my go-to and you are my go-to people. Thanks for being there!

Hi All!!!

Checking in too. It's been a heck of year this year I'll say that's for sure!! Lot's of changes ups and downs for all of us. Health wise for me...I try to keep hyper vigilant about what I'm eating because I just hate getting sick from food. Though I never know when that might happen. This weekend a pickle and a horrible burger patty did me in. I guess I should have know better than to try to eat that from a diner...but you never know until it goes down and then doesn't sit right or digest. Then I add it to the list of OK that's no good for me.

The one good thing about is that the weight I had gained is just about gone now, and if I can ever get a second maybe I can focus on getting in some exercise. If cleaning out my Dad's house in Queens counts at all I am getting in at least a bit.

Keep posting all the fun summer stuff...it's nice to see everyone doing fun things!! Sharpie lets see all those flowers and vegies in your beautiful gardens!!

Bandista!!! Send your garden photo's too!!!

Liz Bill and I were married 39years, we would have celebrated 40 years this past March. It gets a little easier each day but some days I wake up wondering how to make it through the day without him. I just stay as busy as possible and drop into the bed at night with the TV on. I am trying to adjust to being alone. Thank you so much for your support. Weight wise, about the same, up and down, trying to lose a little before vacation in Sept. going to Canada to a dude ranch for a week and to Glacier Nat'l Park. Take care keep posting and yes I am concerned with not seeing Debbie . Hope someone can contact her to make sure she is okay.

Liz Bill and I were married 39years, we would have celebrated 40 years this past March. It gets a little easier each day but some days I wake up wondering how to make it through the day without him. I just stay as busy as possible and drop into the bed at night with the TV on. I am trying to adjust to being alone. Thank you so much for your support. Weight wise, about the same, up and down, trying to lose a little before vacation in Sept. going to Canada to a dude ranch for a week and to Glacier Nat'l Park. Take care keep posting and yes I am concerned with not seeing Debbie . Hope someone can contact her to make sure she is okay.

I'm so glad you had 39 years with him. I envy you... What can I say hon...it's a process and some days are better than others. There's no timeframe and you just need to go with your gut. If it doesn't feel right, don't do it...whatever that may be. If you are sad, be sad. If you are having a good time, don't feel guilty..just go with it.

If you've ever been to or seen a Jewish wedding, you know that the groom smashes a glass with his foot and then the guests all cry out 'Mazel Tov'. The broken glass represents the destruction of the temple which is and was the saddest thing that happened to the ancient Jews. We are commanded to always remember this, especially in the face of our happiest moments. I liken widowhood to that. No matter how happy or wonderful something is, there is just that reminder that you are experiencing this without him. Everything has a bittersweet note now. Alan is gone 22 years. I barely remember his voice yet I don't watch the videos because it's still hard to.

I'm glad that you are going on vacation and have not retreated from the world. You will find your place again, and Bill's passing will eventually become part of the story of your life. As I said before, it's not about getting past this, or moving forward, or heaven forbid, getting over this. You never get over the death of a beloved spouse. You come to an acceptance. It happens over time and you don't suddenly realize it...you just know at some point that it's happened.

Be good to yourself...take care of yourself, and always feel free to reach out to me if you want or need to. Liz.

thanks liz. You understand how it is. Bill and I were a team. Doubt anyone could love me more than he did. He let me be me and never questioned anything I did. WE made major decisions together of course. I think it is possible to be okay with widowhood, I always knew I would be alone at some point, he was 13 years older than me. When I think I will just eat what I want, and to hell with this weight loss stuff.I remember He was my biggest fan and support, he was so proud I made the decision to have lapband surgery. he cheered me on daily. so, it is more difficult without his support but the memory of his beaming at me when I got to my goal will be with me forever.