Post-op Blues

[blashlee 509]

I know these feelings are temporary, and I know that this is all part of my recovery and I just have to work through it. But I haven't had solid food since March 23rd and it's making me depressed. Anytime somebody eats in front of me I'm having to choke back tears. When my boyfriend eats, I am irrationally upset. Mostly because he promised to walk this journey with me, and the night before my surgery he ate Easter dinner.

I don't even want junk food. I just want some kind of regular solid food. I am counting down the hours to my post-op visit and get the OK from my surgeon to move to soft foods. I just want to feel normal. I don't regret my choice to have my surgery. Because of my choice and in following my pre-op diet and going through with my surgery, I have lost 40 lbs in 3 months. I know in the long run this is going to be the greatest thing I ever choose to do for myself, but right now THIS IS SUCKSVILLE.

Edited April 13, 2015 by blashlee

[James Marusek 5,244]

It took me around 6 months after RNY surgery to reach my "happy state" when all the little and big problems were resolved and normal life could continue. So it takes time.

[finediva 979]

It's going to get better. ..soon. Just focus on your recovery. Trust me, you will eat solid food again, and your happy will come back. Sometimes I wishIi could go back to the beginning of my surgery when it was so easy to follow the plan. Some days I struggle really hard to stay the course because I an eat anything! Nothing bothers my tiny tummy. All the best.

[newalysseonlife 7]

Hey Blashlee! Great and random to find you here. If you don't remember I had surgery the same day @ Sharp.

I totally get where you are coming from. Honestly most food smells are making me nauseous, but I still missing variety and actually chewing things. Overall I have been super emotional and I feel bad for my mom and brother with my highs and lows.

[Alex Brecher 10,494]

blashlee,

It’s tough – it really is. And it’s hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel a few weeks after surgery. You’re at one of the hardest points for some people – when surgery is no longer brand-new and when you’ve been unable to eat real food for weeks now, but at the same time, when you still have a lot of weight to lose.

Try to see the positive side of things, even though it’s hard. Think about how hard you’ve worked – not everyone is able to go through with surgery and follow the diet properly. Think about what you said about not even wanting junk food. That’s huge! Think about the progress you’re making every day.

As for your boyfriend and Easter dinner (and other things he eats that bother you), make sure he understands how you’re feeling. Ask him for a reasonable compromise, like maybe he eats certain junk foods outside the house and away from you. If he doesn’t compromise after you explain it to him, you may just have to accept it and remind yourself that this journey is for you. No matter what he eats, the only thing that affects your body is what you eat.

Finally, give yourself permission to “wallow” a little. Wallow a lot. Complain as much as you want. Just stick to the diet!

Good luck.

[blashlee 509]

Hey Blashlee! Great and random to find you here. If you don't remember I had surgery the same day @ Sharp.

I totally get where you are coming from. Honestly most food smells are making me nauseous, but I still missing variety and actually chewing things. Overall I have been super emotional and I feel bad for my mom and brother with my highs and lows.

Yes! I absolutely remember you! I hope everything's going well. My physical recovery has been pretty good but mentally I've been pretty miserable. I'm hoping to shake it off soon. My mom is super worried about me, my boyfriend is probably tired of me LOL I'm just ready to feel "back to normal" and I'm hoping it doesn't take too much longer.

blashlee,

It’s tough – it really is. And it’s hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel a few weeks after surgery. You’re at one of the hardest points for some people – when surgery is no longer brand-new and when you’ve been unable to eat real food for weeks now, but at the same time, when you still have a lot of weight to lose.

Try to see the positive side of things, even though it’s hard. Think about how hard you’ve worked – not everyone is able to go through with surgery and follow the diet properly. Think about what you said about not even wanting junk food. That’s huge! Think about the progress you’re making every day.

As for your boyfriend and Easter dinner (and other things he eats that bother you), make sure he understands how you’re feeling. Ask him for a reasonable compromise, like maybe he eats certain junk foods outside the house and away from you. If he doesn’t compromise after you explain it to him, you may just have to accept it and remind yourself that this journey is for you. No matter what he eats, the only thing that affects your body is what you eat.

Finally, give yourself permission to “wallow” a little. Wallow a lot. Complain as much as you want. Just stick to the diet!

Good luck.

Thanks Alex. I'm definitely wallowing. I guess it just bugs me most because I'm soooo not the wallowing type. I'm such a happy and bubbly person and over the last few weeks I feel like I've lost that and I'm eager to get it back. I don't like feeling like I traded my happiness for weight loss. I know that's a temporary feeling, in the long run I'll have both my health in check and hopefully my emotions back.

Thanks everyone for your kind words and input. I just have to keep trucking along and find my happy place and find it without relying on food. My doctor's program is really strict for the first three months or so. Her patients tend to be very successful and I know that's why. I wanna be a success story too.

[newalysseonlife 7]

Yes! I absolutely remember you! I hope everything's going well. My physical recovery has been pretty good but mentally I've been pretty miserable. I'm hoping to shake it off soon. My mom is super worried about me, my boyfriend is probably tired of me LOL I'm just ready to feel "back to normal" and I'm hoping it doesn't take too much longer.

It is all good hon, if you ever need to talk or get out of the house, let me know. Also I have been going to the Sharp meetings if you want to come. Actually going to the nutrition meeting tonight. Glad you are healing well, I am feeling okay physically myself, just get worn out easy.

[Red0413 53]

Hang in there! You're doing good. Alex has some really good advice.

[blashlee 509]

Yes! I absolutely remember you! I hope everything's going well. My physical recovery has been pretty good but mentally I've been pretty miserable. I'm hoping to shake it off soon. My mom is super worried about me, my boyfriend is probably tired of me LOL I'm just ready to feel "back to normal" and I'm hoping it doesn't take too much longer.

It is all good hon, if you ever need to talk or get out of the house, let me know. Also I have been going to the Sharp meetings if you want to come. Actually going to the nutrition meeting tonight. Glad you are healing well, I am feeling okay physically myself, just get worn out easy.

Same. I pushed the cart around costco on Saturday and immediately fell asleep in the car on the way home. I sent you a message earlier, I'd be down to visit one of the sharp meetings. My surgeon has her support group only once a month and most of the attendees are in a different demographic than me. I'm always open to meet WLS people closer to my age even if it's a different surgery. The walk is roughly the same. Thanks

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

My first six weeks post op of full liquids was hard but my surgeon wants his banded patients to have maximum weight loss right out of surgery. I was very motivated to follow directions, so I did, but you better believe I wallowed a bit! Like you, I went through Easter (and my birthday) last year on liquids. My husband didn't change a thing, but I didn't expect him to. (We're now divorcing, unrelated to WLS.). Anyway, it gets much better as the weight starts to fall off. Hang in there. It's all worth it.

[ready2B 263]

About three weeks out I got very inexplicably moody. It really didn't bother me that people around me could eat normally - it just bothered me that I couldn't and I was afraid I would never be able to enjoy even the basics ever ever again I'd sometimes just sit at the table & start crying halfway through my tiny 1/4 cup of yogurt. At that point, I had a lot of nausea and trouble with a bunch of foods - but it was temporary and now at 5 months, I can really eat anything with no issues.

But it was more than that. When you go through a major surgery like we have, your body's hormones get all out of whack for a bit. Understanding that helped me keep things in perspective. You also are eating a LOT less calories so fatigue might also be a factor in the emotions. I am sure your doc will check all your blood work & Vitamin levels at your appointment to see if anything needs to be adjusted. Hang in there - this is just a little blip in the road and things will get better very soon!

[jusplayin 2]

I had surgery on April 24th and I can eat soooooo much!!!!! This is the second time I have had the sleeve done. I just want it to work this time, I'm scared that it won't