4 weeks out. Depressed and questioning my choice.

[lclemur 161]

I have been down lately, and questioning my choice. When I go there, I realize that there is no going back. Stomach is gone, can't come back. Then I am even more depressed. food, food everywhere, and am not allowed to eat it. I think of all the things that I have enjoyed, and wonder if I will ever make the transition to enjoyment elsewhere. I feel like such a "weirdo" not being able to eat a typical, "normal" portion. I get a kids meal and can eat less than half. I keep telling everyone that this won't be forever, but I really don't know if that is true. This week I have "only" lost 2 lbs. I question if it is because I have added "real" food to my diet. Then I know how rediculous this is, since I have only added the average of 300 - 400 calories. Then I wonder if I am in "starvation mode." Does that happen with wls?

[Elode 8,093]

Yes you can be in starvation mode, it will get easier to eat your still in the baby Stages. Try not to think about it so much. Take it day by day and it will all get easier.

[CanyonBaby 1,852]

If you've haven't been reading the posts of late (or forever, for that matter), start now! There is so much to offer you on your journey. As for a little sunshine in a depressing state, sounds like it's time for a "spring-ahead"! What I mean is, it's time to start focusing on the future. This time of year can be so depressing, especially as summer seems so far away. So check your body measurements, and check them periodically. This should perk up your outlook, because the measurements will change even if the scale doesn't. Then start planning for good things, like what clothing styles you like (you could start adding pieces to your wardrobe that can carry you through several sizes - stretchy slacks, flowy tops...), or, if you're not ready to spend yet, go and try on things (and don't forget to try styles you never dared to before - you might be REALLY surprised!!!). Take a day to splurge on happy feelings - you don't have to spend money to do it! If you have a general idea of styles you want to focus on, but don't want to spend on sizes you'll soon "shrink" out of, then maybe get a cute pair of shoes (my true passion in life - no kidding!!!) to gear your future purchases around. Most importantly, HAVE FUN with all this, it IS a great thing you have done!

[JerseyCityGal 231]

If the only thing you have or ever will love in life is "fast food", then yeah, you made the wrong choice. Is eating all you ever did? You can still eat all day long, all day, every day and get back up to your pre-surgery weight in no time at all. That way you won't have to keep telling people that your small portions won't be "forever", although I can't imagine why they would care. Eat those "normal" portions that got you up to 269 lbs! It will take you longer to consume, but you can do it!

Or you could start exercising, read a couple of good books on nutrition, take a healthy cooking class, make plans for the future, get rid of things in your life that aren't working, search the internet for recipes that fit in your surgeon's meal plan, find a new hobby to keep yourself busy, join a gym, take a walk....

Or think about life at a McDonald's with a kid's meal and pout.

Your choice.

Edited March 14, 2015 by JerseyCityGal

[Babbs 14,680]

Well then I suggest you go right back to your surgeon and have them immediately re attach the portion of your stomach that was removed!

See what I did there? What's done is done. How about making the best of it? Get yourself happy and healthy. Both physically and emotionally. You've been given a great opportunity to do just that!

I suggest some therapy to deal with your issues with food. Please also pick up the book (on Kindle too) The Emotional First Aid Kit by Cynthia Alexander. One if the biggest fallacies out there is that WLS is "the easy" way out. There is nothing easy about it. The weight is not going to just fall off. Your weight loss will slow down and you will stall many times along the way. Your issues with food aren't going to magically just go away. If you put the work in, it will work for you. It will get easier as you keep adjusting to the new lifestyle. I promise!

[gal friday 176]

I learned that when my body gets less than 900 calories, I stop losing weight, and that did happen to me early in my recovery.

See what I did there? What's done is done. How about making the best of it? Get yourself happy and healthy. Both physically and emotionally. You've been given a great opportunity to do just that!

This is a horrible thing to tell someone who is depressed. Just go feel better! Because it's that easy!

[jcrider4551 18]

I get it. Mourning your old life and the true enjoyment you got from eating is hard. You should go talk to a counselor I think that would help you to adjust to your new life.

[Babbs 14,680]

I learned that when my body gets less than 900 calories, I stop losing weight, and that did happen to me early in my recovery.

See what I did there? What's done is done. How about making the best of it? Get yourself happy and healthy. Both physically and emotionally. You've been given a great opportunity to do just that!

This is a horrible thing to tell someone who is depressed. Just go feel better! Because it's that easy!

You seemed to have missed the whole last part of my post where I suggested therapy?

[Blue Sky 89]

Iclemur, you will feel better about things. Give yourself time. I worked through those same emotions by enjoying the victories of the day! I found that when I go out with my family, I still eat what I like (and can eat) although not as much and I am able to finish my food at the same time as they do while enjoying their company all along! As long as others know u are alright with your portions, they will be also. Choose to have fun on purpose!

[ProjectMe 909]

@@lclemur Did you have issues with depression prior to surgery? If so, please touch base with your therapist.

If this is a new development, try to put things into perspective. Im sure you did the research on the surgery, was informed by your surgeon what all it entailed, and read on these boards or others. You have a lot of knowledge...don't let emotions make you forget what you've learned & the reasons why you chose WLS. Make a list of everything you know about WLS & your reasons and refer to the list often. You just need to gain a little perspective back . Your going to be fine!

Edited March 15, 2015 by ProjectMe

[Shrinking_mountain 16]

We all started as food addicts or we wouldn't have needed WLS. Some adjust to the radical change more easily than others. Iclemur came here with her struggles and though we don't need to coddle her, or say "poor you", we can offer support and suggestions in a way that doesn't make her feel guilty for having those feelings.

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

^^^ Then add some more suggestions.

I thought Babbs's suggestions were great.

Here are some more:

1. If your surgeon has an in-person support group, attend those regularly.

2. Make an appointment with your surgeon or a P.A. in her/his office and reveal how you're feeling and invite their suggestions and insights.

3. If you don't have access to your bariatric surgeon, see your PCP and discuss your feelings with him/her and invite their insights and suggestions.

4. Definitely buy that book Babbs suggested -- it's a good one.

5. Walk daily, outside if possible.

6. Start keeping a journal of your feelings -- when and in what circumstances you feel better and when you don't feel so well. See if you can find some patterns in those writings.

7. Try to spend more time with people. Don't let yourself become isolated.

8. Meditate / fantasize about the reasons and goals that prompted you to have this surgery. Get back in touch with those dreams.

9. Follow your surgeon's eating / drinking instructions to the max. Dehydration is notorious for making us feel like crap. It's easy to feel bad (in multiple ways) when we're dehydrated

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

P.S. Also see this post http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/334731-depression-after-the-gastric-sleeve/?p=3777130

Edited March 15, 2015 by VSGAnn2014

[devillynn 193]

You only lost two pounds in a week but if you lose two pounds every week that is 8-10 pounds a month. Exactly how fast do you want it to come off? It will come off. Drink your 64+ Water each day - hit your Protein mark each day - supplement the solid food with Protein Drinks if you need to - and exercise in some form 2-3 times a week. And stop saying "only" as in "I only lost 2 pounds this week" Celebrate those 2 pounds!!! Because the weight didn't get put on over night so it will take work on your part to get it off and time. Good luck to you.

[xangieangx 0]

It will get better..I was in a stage where I got a lil depress and cried..but once I got the support from my family and friends time went by. They ate in from of me eating like pizza, KFC, McDonalds all stuff that I can't eat. They didn't do to be mean but for me to be stronger and fight for what I started to do..keep your head up. Everybody body is diff. You might loose 2 lb in 1 week and other week you might loose 5. Google your research in what you can eat, take your Vitamins and protein..you will be k