Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Recommended Posts

Two years ago my husband and my preschooler signed my birthday card IN FRONT OF ME. Yeah, once we left the restaurant (his favorite, not mine) and our son was in bed he got one hell of a talking to. Last year's birthday went MUCH better.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've tried offering up mine for free too and so far no takers????

Guess I'll keep him. After almost 27 years of marriage it's just far too much to even think about having to train yet another one

Edited by fat_free

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am ready to offer mine up. He is clueless and self-centered, but not in the normal way. I don't even know how to explain it, but I am so angry with him right now, I can't speak, I have nothing nice to say to him.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Jenbaby75:

I think many men have a mild to severe form of Aspergers Syndrome. I am not kidding. Read the symptoms online. They can be great and intelligent people but have problems forming and keeping emotional relationships. They can't "read" people.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I had to look up the symptoms of Aspergers Syndrome to see if I have them.???????????? Nope, not me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would suggest reading "The Five Love Languages", figure out your language, then TELL your husband how to speak it, and make him practice.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well now you know what to wish for when you blow out the candles (if you get a cake) ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I heard Wal-Mart accepts men as returns after Christmas!! ;-)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Years ago, my husband told me that it's a mistake (generally) to think that men are complicated.

He also suggested that when I want him to do X that I simply tell him to do X--but not expect him to make observations and interpret those observations to arrive at the conclusion that I want him to do X.

He said that men are just not that smart.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Jeez where di you gals find these guys??I would never forget an anniversary, birthdate, heck if i dont tell my wife i love her at least 10 times a day i feel bad. I cannot imagine not being attentive and supporting. were going on our soon to be 17th anniversary in april, and ill never stop being good. im sorry for you gals.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Happy belated birthday!

We're going on 35+ years together, and many guys (not all! I have my eye on you, @Stevehud) have to be told exactly what to do. I've had some major meltdowns in our marriage, but if I gave constructive criticism with detailed notes on What Exactly Is Expected, things got done. Here's my notes:

Don't hint or expect something to get done. They're not mind readers. Assign chores, remind them of important dates until they've got it down, and encourage helpfulness. I've found that my husband likes doing certain things and takes pride in them, so I praise him to the skies every once in a while.

Be specific, but nice: "Could you put the dishes away" is clearer than "Tidy up the kitchen." "Take out the garbage, please" is better than "Is the can beginning to smell?"

Guilting doesn't work well on the men in my life. It must be a woman thing. (*sigh*)

Don't let them get away with whining or getting angry or growling. As someone much wiser than me said in another topic, if you accept a behavior, people won't change. And so, you have to be willing to have some major fights now and then. A doormat is for wiping your feet on. A pissed-off woman is a force to be reckoned with.

If your guy says or does something that gets you mad, say so, but in a way that is not hostile, but helpful. "You know, honey, I'd appreciate it if you didn't monitor my food. I know you mean well, but you're getting on my last nerve."

Anyway, those are my two cents. Sometimes a refurbished husband can turn out to be a gem, so don't give up hope!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×