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July 1,2013 the life changing day
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It's been a year . What an amazing life changing year. Last year at this time I was a nervous wreck of getting banded almost having an anxiety attack in the waiting room before surgery but wouldn't let it show. So sacred of what life would be with this band how would I feel how would I eat how would I live. I thought for sure the band would he like a flashing neon light and everyone would laugh and scoff that I had it done. I kept it a secret and still do. At first it was because I was ashamed I needed surgical Intervention to do what seemed like an easy task just stop eating. Now I keep it a secret because it's my most treasured precious love. I'm sitting in the hospital getting my Esopogram done. Walked in with my head held high wearing a cute size large sundress which needs to be taken in I might be a medium now. Smiling not worried if I will fit in chair or people will stare and judge. I'm sitting cross legged in chair and there is room for my purse beside me in the chair what the hell is this. It's fabulous that's what it is!!!! I'm down 104lbs from a tight 22/24 pants 3x shirt to a size 12/14 pants med/large shirt. I can shop in any store in the regular size clothes although I did try a plus size store last week as it was all to big. Do I see what everyone else sees no but I'm getting there. I thought I always had great self esteem and somehow it's fluctuating have some low days but that's normal I guess because now because I'm learning to live in my new body. I have been obese for 25 years and a consistent normal size for 1. Of course I lost weight hundreds of times before but never this amount never this size in my entire adult life . And I know it's gone forever .I'm shocked when I see pictures of me like wow I did this with my band eating right and exercising. I now know the band is a tool and I'm working it. I'm at the gym 5-7 days a week eating way less and moving more. Learning the signals when I'm satisfied. Still working on the chewing better and slowing down as sometimes I forget to eat for several hours and then I get super hungry the old me kicks in and I might not chew but my band reminds me chew more and u need way less food. The amazing encouraging people I have met here is as priceless as my band. No judgements just caring, understanding and encouragement and a good swift reality check when need be. I'm healthier I have participated in2 5k and one 10k obstacle events and looking to do more. I'm ancy if I don't eat right or work out. I crave healthy food and movement. Things sure have changed but 100000% for the better. Had I known then what I feel now I would of done this years ago.
Love my band !!! And it's awesome seeing all my hard work paying off. Got a list of plastic surgeons to start interviewing so I can save for and research the next phase In my transformation