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I was a "super healthy" fat person until surgery changed my life. Was it worth it?

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When I started this journey I was 5.3 and 264 pounds. I had no health issues. I did martial arts, I went to the gym regularly, I loved to swim laps for exercise, and I didn't have any aches or pains. My blood counts were good and I *thought* I was very happy with myself. I had friends, a successful business, a happy husband and kids, an overall great life.

I decided to have surgery because I didn't want my body to start breaking down and I knew it would. While I could do all those things above, I was starting to get very tired and increasingly lazy. After an hour of laps, I just wanted to sit in my pool chair and read. After a three hour martial arts day, I wanted to sleep on the sofa. I was finding myself watching my family do fun stuff more than participating and I was getting increasingly nervous about going places like the park because I was wondering how I was going to cover up the huffing and puffing and the excessive sweating.

Looking back, I was truly fooling myself into believing that my life was normal except for my clothing size. My biggest dread was going to school events and being the fat mom. I hated that not only for myself, but for my kids. I knew they would never say so, but what child wants to have the super obese fat mom in the room? I was very self conscious about going out in public, never wanting a hair out of place, or my hair and outfit less than perfect. (By God, I may have been a fat person, but I was going to be a perfectly groomed fat person 'cuz that would fool people! Just like wearing all black would fool them or not actually eating in public would fool them.)

My mental armor against my obesity was a louder laugh, a bigger smile, a heartier personality, and I was always told that I was a bit intimidating because I oooooozed self confidence. (I am thrilled to say that I have maintained these characteristics, so I did gain something from my time as an obese person.)

Here I am, 1 year later, 111 pounds thinner (but still 5.3. HA!). I hit my original goal of 159, and am now about 3 pounds away from my stretch goal of 149. I really think I want to get to 139, but really, if I never lose another pound, so be it.

I still swim, do martial arts, I TEACH kickboxing, and I zumba my heart out several days a week. I no longer sweat excessively, I can not only keep up with the family, but I am most often the one who WANTS to go out and do physical things. After a great exercise session, I have MORE energy as opposed to flopping my happy arse on the couch for the rest of the day. I am down from a size 20 to a size 6 and I was able to squeeze into a size 4 the other day. (I turned blue, I couldn't breathe, bend or sit, but I buttoned those b!tches!)

I have done several mud runs and am always looking for more opportunities. I am looking into becoming a certified Zumba instructor and am attending a 3 day martial arts camp without fear of not being able to keep up. I can go into public looking like a wreck from the gym and no longer feel like people are looking at me as the sloppy fat woman, and if I buy a cup of fro-yo or have junk food in my cart, I no longer feel the judgmental stares. (And the meat heads at the GNC actually WANT to help me instead of just ringing me up without eye contact.)

As I start this summer as a thinner person for the first time in 15-20ish years, every day is a wonderment. I am wearing shorts. I am buying sleeveless dresses. I have floppy skin, but I don't care!! I can buy clothes anywhere I want and I have the freedom to spend my day without focusing on how I look, what I am going to eat, who is looking at me judgmentally, if I am going to be able to fit in a space, if I am going to crowd someone. I can be so much more spontaneous in my schedule and I am always looking forward to trying new things. (A super cool perk? If I get something on my clothes or need a quick change of outfit because something comes up, I can run into the store, buy something off the rack without trying it on and I KNOW it's going to fit!!! WHAT!?!?!)

Life was good before. Life is freaking AWESOME now.

Before.

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Now.

attachicon.gif 1year.jpg

And the fun stuff!

attachicon.gif rm100.jpgattachicon.gif RM101.jpgattachicon.gif rm103.jpg

Wow! What an amazing post!! Thanks so much for taking the time to share. So motivating for this newbie pre-opper!!

Thanks for sharing. I'm terrified that I won't like how I look afterwards, particularly the loose skin part. I feel like I won a hard fought battle to accept and love myself when I gained weight, and now I feel a little bit like a hypocrite.....as if I'm saying I'm not good enough just the way I am.

Sent from my iPhone

Thank you so much for this, @@LipstickLady! I'm starting just about where you were (within about 10 pounds) and at the same height. My biggest issue is I have bad knees from having been an athlete as a teen and am staring down bilateral knee replacement. I'm tired of being the fat mom. Thank you, thank you, thank you.!

Lipstick Lady thank you for your post. I so identified with you I have been saying I can be a happy fat man. I'm the most popular teacher in my high school, love my students and have a ball teaching, have a beautiful brown skinned husband who loves every pound of me and why don't I just stay this way? Well I'm not in shape, I can barely walk around the block with the dogs, I'm often depressed and spend the whole weekend on the couch, I'm out of breath , have high blood pressure and am disgusted with how I look. Food rules my life and always has. Tomorrow I begin my two week liquid diet. Surgery with Bariatric Pal on June 27. I'm so proud of you and want to be like you! I wish you lived in Seattle! Thank you for your inspiration so much!

Wow. Thanks for all your encouragement. I'm about your former size. It gives me hope. I am 62, but I do like to do things like bike or even just walk which I 'm not able to do right now because of back and knee issues. I'm getting back injections to help with pain for that issues. I do bike everyday with a bike while sitting in a chair 7 days a week. Can't wait to have the oppertunity to return to life again.

Thanks again so much for your story. It truly does inspire me.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I747 using the BariatricPal App

  • Author

Thanks for sharing. I'm terrified that I won't like how I look afterwards, particularly the loose skin part. I feel like I won a hard fought battle to accept and love myself when I gained weight, and now I feel a little bit like a hypocrite.....as if I'm saying I'm not good enough just the way I am.

Sent from my iPhone

I **wasn't** good enough. Mentally, intellectually, emotionally -- yes. Physically, no. That's why I had surgery. I needed to become the best person I could. Nothing hypocritical about that.

Your story is inspirional and your looking are looking great. I'm sure your loves his hotter wife

Sent from my SM-N915V using the BariatricPal App

He loved me before. ;) He loves me now. My weight/size plays no part in that. :D

LipstickLady -

What a wonderful, honest, well written post! You described so well the little things we deal with on a daily basis.

I'm 52 and also considered a "fit-fat" person (but that's really an oxymoron, right?). My cholesterol and blood pressure levels are fine and I'm not diabetic . I swim. I've done CrossFit. I do yoga. I spin (and can keep up with women half my size).

But at a high of 280 lbs these activities take a major toll on my body and I have to pop a couple of Advil because my knees are swollen, my back aches and I'm exhausted. The rest of the day I'm on the couch feeling like a failure wondering why I can't get this problem under control.

I'm exactly 1 week post-op today. The week has been a physical and emotional challenge, but posts like yours are so inspirational, and such a huge help. Your photos show someone who is living a life full of joy and it helps me to see that this could be my future too.

Sending you a huge thank you!

Lisa

  • Author

LipstickLady -

What a wonderful, honest, well written post! You described so well the little things we deal with on a daily basis.

I'm 52 and also considered a "fit-fat" person (but that's really an oxymoron, right?). My cholesterol and blood pressure levels are fine and I'm not diabetic . I swim. I've done CrossFit. I do yoga. I spin (and can keep up with women half my size).

But at a high of 280 lbs these activities take a major toll on my body and I have to pop a couple of Advil because my knees are swollen, my back aches and I'm exhausted. The rest of the day I'm on the couch feeling like a failure wondering why I can't get this problem under control.

I'm exactly 1 week post-op today. The week has been a physical and emotional challenge, but posts like yours are so inspirational, and such a huge help. Your photos show someone who is living a life full of joy and it helps me to see that this could be my future too.

Sending you a huge thank you!

Lisa

No. Thank YOU for your kind words. Sincerely.

Thank You for sharing. Im on my 1st day preop diet and I was worried I couldn't do it but your post has helped me. I know I can do it and I know I can loose this weight. You look so awesome.

@@LipstickLady All I can say is wow! You are such an inspiration and have been since I joined this board 7 months ago. Your story parallel mines in so many ways. You look hot and at least 10 years younger!

  • 2 weeks later...

Im just five days out of vsg surgery and i feel good so far thank God! Just a bit of a challenge getting all the liquid and protein in one day but i will get there lol

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