Book on self sabotaging

[melanndoll 92]

I do know that I have a problem with self sabotaging and I am sure I am not the only one. Has anyone read any good books on this? Most recently, I got to 49.8 lbs lost. I have wanted to get to 50 so badly, but as soon as the scale got so close I started eating things I know I shouldn't. Or even larger portions of healthy foods. I'm sure it's something mental and would just like to understand it better and also figure out how to not do it.

[Roo101769 742]

Very good question. I would love to read something on the subject myself. I know I could use help with it. Getting some insight from a professional, and not just someone with an opinion wanting to make a buck. Hope to find this information....

[pupichupi 124]

Hey girls, I am the same way, I haven't had my surgery yet but this is a great thing to bring up prior so I don't do anything to sabotage my future, I was actually looking up books right before I saw your post about bariatric surgery and how to be successful and I found a book that may interest you. It's called get out of your own way by Dr Mark Goulston. I am going to download it on my kindle for when I go to the hospital and I can read it while I wait and for after surgery!!! Well good luck with hitting that 50+ mark, I know you can do it!!!

[Leepers 1,195]

It's hard. I just reached 50 pounds lost, and I've been having a really rough week. I don't know if it's because we lost an hour due to daylight savings or because I've changed around a few medications. But my workouts have sucked and I've been fighting wanting fattening foods.

I just do my best to keep with it. I so want to lose 80 more pounds more than I want to eat Pasta or donuts. But I feel your frustration.

[pupichupi 124]

Leepers, do you have anything that you so desperately want to fit in after all this is over? Like a goal outfit? I have one and I am getting it from my mom before I have my surgery, it's from a LONG time ago, but she still has it for me, just in case? I loved it it was the one and only time I lost weight and I was 21 and I just stopped eatting for a year? I will never do that again!!! I couldn't anyway I love food too much!!! lol? But it's a beautiful straight forest green crushed velvet gown, I never went to my prom in high school I was too fat for a pretty dress, and so when I lost that weight I bought this and only wore it one time to a Christmas party for the job I did at the time and I felt so beautiful. I have never felt as beautiful as I did that night, and I want to fit into that again. I was 150 lbs when I wore that gown, and I don't care if its something I will never wear I just want to fit in it and look good too!!! Maybe get something like that and hang it up in your room where you will see it everyday and it will be your reminder that the Pasta and donuts aren't going to get you into that outfit? Good luck!!!

[terri82much 80]

I have gotten to the point of losing 52 pounds in just under 4 months. IT is this time frame that usually gets me! I could never stick to it! New habits formed? Nope I slip back into the old ones! I have been having pop which I KNOW I shouldn't have since it was a big addiction for me everyday!!! I am struggling with no weight lost in 12 days and know that I need to get my butt to the gym but I have no energy! I am getting my protien in and my Water but have been indulging occasionally in chocolates and chips and popcorn. :s Initially I thought no big deal I'm down to an 8-10 in size, wearing my teenagers clothes and look better than I have in years but then I start this up and the weight has stopped. Starting to feel the self sabatoge kicking in. I know I have to do a recommitment week just life getting in the way and the mental game which I am currently losing!

So you are not the only one and apparently neither am I hopefully I can gain some strength knowing that!

[SandyM 1,956]

Lol, I could probably write that book. I will tell you, if you are self sabatoging because of what the scales say, try staying away from them and see if it helps.

[PrettyThick1 1,860]

The EXACT same thing happened to me. I was .7 from my goal and guess what? I gained 7 whole pounds!!!!

I do know that I have a problem with self sabotaging and I am sure I am not the only one. Has anyone read any good books on this? Most recently, I got to 49.8 lbs lost. I have wanted to get to 50 so badly, but as soon as the scale got so close I started eating things I know I shouldn't. Or even larger portions of healthy foods. I'm sure it's something mental and would just like to understand it better and also figure out how to not do it.

[Recycled 2,182]

A book ain't gonna do it.

We've all done books, programs, miracle drugs, plans, seminars, blah blah blah. This is it people. This is the last chance. There is no more bag of tricks. Tell yourself that reality. You can't do the stuff that you know caused you to fail in the past. You must be successful this time. And you know how to do it. So do it and stop making excuses.

The self sabotaging is when you pick up that piece of chocolate, completely aware you shouldn't..... but you don't put it down. The sleeve won't make you put it down. Just do it. You chose this course of action to finally get rid of obesity......now stick to it. You won't be able to try something else later.

Fight the urge. Don't keep looking for gratification from others in expected failure. Count the victories you've achieved so far and refuse to let them slide away. Fight to achieve more.

I'm not preaching people......I'm living it too. If I don't succeed this time, I will lose all personal credibility for everything I do. I must make this work. Instead of saying "I know I shouldn't have done that" ......Tell yourself "I know I shouldn't" and DON'T do it. Find something correct to do, quickly! Drag yourself bitching and complaining to the gym, Once your there, it's over soon and you'll feel better. You'll still know it will be a job to motivate yourself to come next time, but you proved yet again you can do it. The reward is difficult. Make every pound you lose a victory you can't bear to let go of. If I gain back a single pound, I get really mad at myself and I double up on attention to every detail and tighten any sloppiness in my choices and routines.

Never has the "give it an inch and it'll take a mile" saying, been more important. don't let it start to slide.

Ok, I said I wasn't preaching and now I'm preaching. Nuff said. Get back on track and win this thing.

[gowalking 10,790]

Leepers, do you have anything that you so desperately want to fit in after all this is over? Like a goal outfit? I have one and I am getting it from my mom before I have my surgery, it's from a LONG time ago, but she still has it for me, just in case? I loved it it was the one and only time I lost weight and I was 21 and I just stopped eatting for a year? I will never do that again!!! I couldn't anyway I love food too much!!! lol? But it's a beautiful straight forest green crushed velvet gown, I never went to my prom in high school I was too fat for a pretty dress, and so when I lost that weight I bought this and only wore it one time to a Christmas party for the job I did at the time and I felt so beautiful. I have never felt as beautiful as I did that night, and I want to fit into that again. I was 150 lbs when I wore that gown, and I don't care if its something I will never wear I just want to fit in it and look good too!!! Maybe get something like that and hang it up in your room where you will see it everyday and it will be your reminder that the Pasta and donuts aren't going to get you into that outfit? Good luck!!!

Hi Pupichupi. I posted this pic on another thread on Saturday. That's me in my mother's mink coat. I haven't been able to wear it in about 13 years and I never thought I'd ever wear it again. It wasn't my goal outfit but it was so wonderful to feel the accomplishment of being able to fit into it again that I was nearly overwhelmed by it. Good luck and make sure you post a pic of yourself when you make it into that velvet gown.

[cheryl2586 3,053]

You have to come to the realization that you have to do what you need to do to get healthy. Stop thinking about it as losing weight and think about it as being healthy. When I get in those moods where I want to eat a half gallon of ice cream I think about how good I feel after losing 120lbs and how easily I could just put it right back on. Of course weight loss is a plus but you are trying to get healthy. Free yourself from food prison. Only you can do that. No book, no therapist, no one but you can do it. We are addicted to food point blank. If you want to let your addiction keep you prisoner for life then do it. Put the scale away and stop getting on it until you can wrap your head around the fact that it's not going to move everyday, every week or every month in some cases. If you just make good food choices then the weight will come off. You have to want it more then sabotaging yourself. If not then you won't get it.

[melanndoll 92]

Thank you everyone! I will definitely check that book out! Recycled and Cheryl, I feel that if it was that easy to just not do it then I wouldn't be here in the first place. I was hoping if I could get more info on what it is and why I do it then maybe I could fix it. Being like, oh ok, I'm not gonna do that anymore is not gonna work for me! Glad it has for you guys though!

[BladeFox 235]

I agree with most. I think I'm gonna need a shrink for this problem. I don't like getting a lot of physical/body attention. It's tough even for me to say I look good because I was always taught about modesty. Today's society is over sexualized and the hounding and remarks is not great for me. Odd I know.

[melanndoll 92]

That is a very interesting take on it blade! I know I've heard people say that even once they've lost the weight they still feel fat. Even in the way they move and carry themselves. And even though this is something we want for ourselves it's still a change. A good one, but a change nonetheless. Adjusting to change can be difficult, so maybe when we start to succeed we get scared of change and self sabotage? Sorry, now I'm rambling!

[BladeFox 235]

No you're not rambling. I just think this is a big subject that needs to be addressed. Many of us will return to our old ways due to fear, being sexualized, and self consciousness. If those that face this issue, (me) don't get a handle of it and face it head on we will never succeed and there inlies the problem. That is why I am keeping my psychologist to help me through this once and for all. So good to have a support team with weight loss this time around!