People Are Noticing And Commenting On How Little I'm Eating!

[Disabledaccount 154]

So Thanksgiving was pretty uneventful, no crazy drama or anything but one thing that kept annoying me was folks commenting on how little I'm eating. I posted about this but I'm self conscious about people noticing how little I'm eating. Well over Thanksgiving the comments just wouldn't stop, people kept asking if everything was okay, did I not like the food, commenting that I barely ate so much so that I felt pressured to eat a bit more to seem 'normal'.

I went out with a friend twice and even she incredulously kept bringing up that I barely touched my food and I ate less than her. (Yeah I used to eat like crazy but her comment really irked me). I'm a very private person and I really don't want to have to put up with explaining what/how much I'm eating to anyone. Argh! It's noone's business and I don't owe anyone anything! What's a good strategy for dealing with this?

[Beach Lover 1,084]

Tell them you have queasy stomach and can't eat much or you ate earlier and your not that hungry.

[NMJG 1,266]

Fortunately, I only have one friend who does this. At dinner a few days ago she made a big deal of it and worried something was wrong with me, I just said I ate too much brie and cranberry appetizer and spoiled my dinner. Another time I think I said I was getting over the flu and wasn't hungry. It's hard. In general I don't lie about things, but I do fib when it comes to this, as it is no one else's business. A few good lines are:

• I had a big lunch/breakfast/whatever
• Just had birthday cake at the office
• I don't care for what I ordered (this can backfire though)
• I'm saving up for (whatever the next meal is)

Just don't make it seem like you have a health issue. That gets people worried. Good luck.

[Madam Reverie 2,958]

I'd go with the 'I dunno, been feeling off of late.. Plus, I had a milky coffee/tea not long ago... Sorry, I'm fine, just not got much of an appetite...'

I share your pain. Its not easy to be scrutinised like that.

Tried over the top humour? You could jump up and down like you'd drunk 20 red bull and say 'wooo hooo, I'm flyin' people'.. Although, in hindsight, that might end up with you facing an 'intervention'.

Try not to let it get you down and get your dancing shoes ready to side-step your way out of it

[dylanmiles23 2,198]

During the Jewish New Year in September a woman sitting next to me asked why there was almost no food on my plate. My husband told her I had plenty. She has asked me how much weight I have lost and I have told her I don't share that with anyone. Her face was priceless when I answered her. Too bad. She is a cousin's friend and most people don't know about my band. I am private with relatives not friends.

Tell people I am trying to control my portions and I eat Protein first, then veggies and then fruit and maybe carbs. I have used that one too.

Good luck with your new journey.

[Mrs.RRn 2,110]

It's much easier as time passes. No one comments to me anymore now that I'm near goal. I guess it just seems normal... Although I do still get questions from waitstaff which makes me a little self conscious. The other day I left a rather large tip and wrote "thanks for not making me feel crazy" on the ticket bc I was so happy to not have my wants questioned. Lol.

[cindymg 629]

How sad is it that people have nothing better to do/talk about than the quantity of food you are eating? I guess because all of my family and friends know that I have had sleeve surgery, no one really pays any attention to what I eat.

But it's also real easy to play the anorexic's game and move food around on my plate to make it look like I am still eating. I try to sample a little of everything like the appetizers to make appear like I am normal. When a waiter questions if I enjoyed something that I didn't eat, I respond that if I eat too much of my soup/salad/appetizer, I won't be able to eat my dinner. What I can't eat I wrap up and take home. I don't eat bread or Desserts and haven't for many years, and if anyone questions that I respond that I am diabetic and that's enough to shut anyone up.

[7 Bites_Jen 479]

It always amazes me how much emphasis people put on how much or what we're eating! Just today I went to lunch with a friend who is VERY aware of my surgery and she made a comment on how much I ate: "Is your sleeve tight today? You didn't eat much!" I just looked at her and said, "When do I EVER eat much??"

Maybe a good response would be, "I'm watching my portion sizes - gotta get a head start on those new year's resolutions and there's a big plate of chocolate chip Cookies with my name on it at home!" LOL. Or you could comment on how MUCH they ate!!

[livvsmum 2,368]

I know exactly what you mean. No one at work knows that I had surgery. They just think I am on a diet. We have lunch meetings frequently and there is this one person that consistently goes out of her way to ask my why I'm eating so little or be sarcastic about it or try and pressure me into eating more in front of everyone. It's totally uncomfortable and getting to be a real issue to me. Clearly I don't want to tell you why, so quit making a big deal about it!!!!! Most people will say "is that all you're eating" I'll say "yeah" and that's the end of it. Not her..... (insert eye roll)

[Beach Lover 1,084]

I know exactly what you mean. No one at work knows that I had surgery. They just think I am on a diet. We have lunch meetings frequently and there is this one person that consistently goes out of her way to ask my why I'm eating so little or be sarcastic about it or try and pressure me into eating more in front of everyone. It's totally uncomfortable and getting to be a real issue to me. Clearly I don't want to tell you why, so quit making a big deal about it!!!!! Most people will say "is that all you're eating" I'll say "yeah" and that's the end of it. Not her..... (insert eye roll)

doesn't it just make you want to look straight at the person and say "Shut the F*** Up!!" Honestly, sometimes people can be so darn rude and you just want to be rude back but it just calls more attention to yourself. I just wish I could look at someone and say that but it would eat me up all night.

[Disabledaccount 154]

I know exactly what you mean. No one at work knows that I had surgery. They just think I am on a diet. We have lunch meetings frequently and there is this one person that consistently goes out of her way to ask my why I'm eating so little or be sarcastic about it or try and pressure me into eating more in front of everyone. It's totally uncomfortable and getting to be a real issue to me. Clearly I don't want to tell you why, so quit making a big deal about it!!!!! Most people will say "is that all you're eating" I'll say "yeah" and that's the end of it. Not her..... (insert eye roll)

It's so frustrating! I want to be able to eat without dealing with anyone's commentary. I'm a private person and loathe being singled out in this sort of way

[cindymg 629]

Another thought: people commenting on what you are eating is a bit of passive-aggressive behavior. A response could be just as simple as "jealous?"

It reminds me of the treatment of women in the workplace. I am in IT and for many years of my career I was always the only woman in many meetings. Invariably there would be at least one jerk who after an off-color remark, would look at me and say something Jerky like, "excuse my French". The real purpose behind the comment was to passive-aggressively point out that I was different -- and not one of the boys, not welcome.

Analogy here? Could it be that sticking to your eating plan, eating small quantities is not welcome here? Just a thought.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

I know exactly what you mean. No one at work knows that I had surgery. They just think I am on a diet. We have lunch meetings frequently and there is this one person that consistently goes out of her way to ask my why I'm eating so little or be sarcastic about it or try and pressure me into eating more in front of everyone. It's totally uncomfortable and getting to be a real issue to me. Clearly I don't want to tell you why, so quit making a big deal about it!!!!! Most people will say "is that all you're eating" I'll say "yeah" and that's the end of it. Not her..... (insert eye roll)

doesn't it just make you want to look straight at the person and say "Shut the F*** Up!!" Honestly, sometimes people can be so darn rude and you just want to be rude back but it just calls more attention to yourself. I just wish I could look at someone and say that but it would eat me up all night.

Wait...WHAT?! You aren't supposed to do that?