I just had surgery 10/21 and my family want or barely help. My house is a mess, I feel claustrophobic. You would think when I start cleaning, cooking, taking care of toddler (cause she can't care for herself), walking the dog, laundry, etc; you would think someone will step up. Then when I ask I get "not right now" then later "I forgot". I'm so freaking frustrated. I can't get no one to take me where I need to go. My income has been delayed no fault of my own. So I have no money. The people I have always been there for are not here for me. I can't believe what I'm going through. I had a plan. What the freak happened. I feel like I'm in a twilight zone. Just had to vent. Time for some serious praying and shutting down some negative vibes.

I'm sending positive vibes your way. I know what it's like to have no support. But my situation is different. Try calling a meeting and sitting everyone down and just again explaining that if something happens to you then the show stops for everyone. So its in their best interest to help you get through this and after another week or 2 you will feel much better. I just said a prayer for you.

I'm sorry determined. Family can be so frustrating at times. Do you think expressing your frustrations will help? You could put yourself in serious danger.

I was sleeved on the 21st also. I'm so sorry you're going through all that. Honesty, with the exception of the toddler, I just flat wouldn't do anything else. The mess will still be there and either someone will step up or you can deal with it when you feel better. Remember you did this for yourself so it's really important to take care of yourself now. If you don't all the crap will just go on longer. Best of luck, I'm pulling for you!

Show them your scars. The picture will not go out of their heads. Might earn a few minutes rest. You are the rock and they cannot image you needing a break. It stinks. Your not alone. Vent anytime you want!

I know how you feel. I had back surgery in Jan. 2010 and was not allowed to lift, bend, carry, or do much of anything for weeks. Neither son nor husband got it. I had to do laundry, feed cats, and a ton of other stuff that required bending and lifting. Hubby and son were clueless. It made me so mad.

sending you a big positive hug. Do not risk hurting yourself!

This is why I love this app. Thx for the support. I took a shower, blasting my favorite spiritual and motivational playlist, made my announcement that superwoman is down for a week, read my scriptures, and shut my door. Feel so much better now. Nothing like getting in the spirit. Don't know how long this will last but thanks everyone and have a blessed night.

Good for you!

I had a melt down one day and said that everyone acts like I'm super woman, I just had major surgery, I'm working two jobs AND trying to do things at home for 4 kids and hubby....I am NOT super woman!!! Can I get a little bit of help around here and maybe just once feel like someone cares enough to try and take care of ME for a change?!? It helped for about 3 days, lol. But man did those 3 days feel good!

Edited October 27, 201312 yr by crowsnestmama

I am so sorry that you're going through this did they offer help before hand and are now backing out? Not that either way is ok. It makes me nuts hearing of stories like this because it's such an important and stressful surgery that my first thought is to help those you love so they have every chance to succeed. If I was closer is help you!! Just remember when they want something that you're busy or forgot. They'll get the hint

Take a deep breath and relax. Right now house work and all the other stuff have to wait. I know you have to do for the baby but thats it. DONT get frustrated you can do this. Ask each and everyone specifically what it is you want them to do and why and if they dont do it there is nothing you can do about it. If the house is in a mess leave it. You dont want to bust your sleeve. You have to get some rest. Thats very important and stay hydrated. Mentally i know this situation is probably on your last nerve but you just had major surgery and you dont want complications simply because you did not do what you were suppose to do regarding home care for your sleeve. Do what you can take care of your little one and forget about the rest. You are gonna do just fine. Remember when you get frustrated take a deep breath and know that this is a positive step forward. Also remember to ask God for strength and patience. He will never leave you. Stay strong because you can do this because God got you.

A family meeting sounds like a good idea. If that does not work just take care of you and your little one.

I think they got a clue. I think a family meeting will help. I have to remember everyone is not like me and let them help in their own way and time. And when they say mommy/honey go sit down that's my que and I need to sit down, be patient and let it go. I thank God for all your prayers and advice. I'm so thankful right now. Love you guys. I'm on a mission to take care of me. Don't know why this is such a challenge, but I can't help nobody if things get worse and I'm all jacked up.

Had a good day of rest. I did have to go to the store for food for ME, my cousin came by and gave me the money she owed me but did not apologize for the offensive things she said to me, acting like nothing happened so I went with it. My oldest daughter stepped up cooked dinner and keep the little one with her. Yes I have a teen and tot B-). I put honey bun on the couch and resting watching AFV getting my laugh on. Ooh yea