family support

[ladyditkd 8]

GM, I am 10 days out and doing pretty well, I am in the middle of a 3wk liquid phase..I'm not hungry but I do feel at times I need more substance food.I recently asked my hubby who is also overweight to support me by eating better and not to drink aleast for the 3wks, hoping watching me thru my journey he might be insprired. to do better but he refuses, I feel sad, that my hubby isn't willing to do this for me while I haven't had solid food in 11 days, am I wrong.

[debrooks66 41]

As much as I hate to say this because I experience this as well in my own home, this must be said, it is time to focus on you. This is a tough time for you and you need the support but when you don't get it - it is time to say "it's about me". Take control and know that this phase will pass and when it does you start slipping in healthy foods to your husband. Mine has not figured out that he ate turkey chill and meatloaf the other day. He has turkey sausage with his Breakfast and there are more fresh vegetables than there used to be. You make the change at home and when he is away from home these are his choices. 11 days has passed you're doing great. It gets boring but have no fear I am 2 months out and I have had my ups and downs BUT you get through it. I am down 54 pounds! Feeling great and looking forward to the new me!

You got this. You take control of you and then it will only roll out to your husband!

Hopefully that made some sense?

[RJ'S/beginning 5,357]

If I had done that to my hubby he would be seriously ill..He is one of those long drinks of Water...loses weight if he misses one meal...

I have never expected him to eat like me or even eat my stuff...But as I go along I find him trying my food and eating my left overs and he says he feels better and it is because like the lady said above...I introduced new food to him.....

This is my journey, not his...he will never really understand what I have and will go through...So I don't look for any special commendation from him....That said..He is totally on board and supports me anyway ...I know I have to run this race, not anyone else who has not experienced this journey...

That is one reason I am on this forum so much..There are people here like me who understand the struggles we faced and face.......Use this forum as your support system if you must...I personally am grateful for it...Your going to do great...and I think he will follow...

[ladyditkd 8]

Thanks, ladies I know it's my own journey, but I guess I'm surprised, once when my mom had t loose weight super fast dr put her on a diet and I didn't blink an eye I was right there for her, and she lost 63pds and me 40, I just thought hubby would join my struggle. and yes this is a great forum.. thanks again.

[endless80 697]

My partner is overweight as well and he has, for the most part, started eating better and losing weight with me. Yesterday, I checked the bank account and he totally pigged out at a local Gyro place on the fly. I was kind of miffed about it but hey, he didn't have this surgery. I did. His journey is not mine and though I cannot force him, I can influence what comes into our house food wise and he respects that.

I like to think that my partner and I are two individual pillars and the relationship is the Colosseum that we're both holding up, together. I don't feel the need to control him into doing what I do and vice versa. However, he knows better than to bring McDonalds into this house. lol

Edited October 26, 2013 by endless80

[gamergirl 4,609]

I think your husband didn't make the decision to get sleeved you did. So expecting him to change is not fair, IMHO. however, I wouldn't see his eating as not supportive. Not supportive would be if he were trying io make YOU eat, tempting you, offering you things you love etc. That would be not supportive. Maybe it would help to see the ways in which he is supporting you? (E.g., agreeing to use family finances toward the surgery, Protein Shakes etc., agreeing it do more of your chores when you are recovering, being with you through the surgery, and other things like that?)

[keglenne 23]

I have the same issue. My husband eats whatever and whenever he feels like it. This is the thing he has a totally different metabolism and genetic makeup than I do. Also he is comfortable with his weight but im not. So the way I look at it is this is my battle not anyone elses. I have to be in control of my own destiny. I have to make my own decisions on becoming a better me. Also this decision that I made to have the gastric sleeve done was solely my decision. I did this for me. So dont worry about your husband keep fighting till you are where you wana be. If you need support you have this forum and other support groups. Good luck God bless and lets loose some weight.:-)