Dating: "I think you are perfect the way you are" guy

BabyGotBack · February 22, 2007

I also married a man like that and we are going on 12 years of marriage. He met me heavy and watched me lose and gain over and over and over again. From 240 to 145 twice and throught 2 pregnancies where with the first I gained 85 pounds due to toxemia (pre eclampsia).

He says he never saw me as overweight because he just saw "me".

He is thrilled with my getting banded and is very supportive. He does not have a weight problem and has the build of a fire man. He is also drop dead gorgeous. He is Puerto Rican and looks like a cross between Derrick Jetter and some other baseball player named Alexandro Sanchez or something like that. I would never leave him!!!!

The funny thing is he is trying to lose weight now too! I tell him he does not need to but he is trying to lose 15 pound!

Fauxnaif · February 23, 2007

I married him when I was over 300.

He is so healing for me after my childhood with ultracritical parents.

These kind of men are out there. But they're not at bars or clubs or construction sites. They're men just going about their business dealing with issues of their own and they realize perfection is fleeting and not all that interesting.

He never commented either way on my weight. Didn't tell me to lose or try to get me to gain.

gadgetlady · February 23, 2007

But they're not at bars or clubs or construction sites. They're men just going about their business dealing with issues of their own and they realize perfection is fleeting and not all that interesting.

VERY well said!

Kat817 · February 24, 2007

I knew my husband in HS--where I was skinny. Dated him in my 20's when I was skinny. Fell in love with him---when I was skinny. Now I don't say skinny as opposed to what I am, I am 5'9" and weighed 116 pounds...I was skinny! We went our separate ways, he left to continue his schooling, I remained here. We each married and divorced...and I put on 170 pounds. He contacted me years later, and I cautiously over the phone told him I was not the skinny, naive girl I used to be--he said he didn't care. He come to see me, we dated long disatance for 2 years, married and never looked back. When we married he gained about 60 pounds. We did Atkins, we both lost really well, his stayed off, mine didn't! Through the years he has never once said anything negative about my weight. When I broached the subject of banding, he was a bit concerned, but we knew a couple who had had it done, and he saw that they were ok, so he said if I wanted to do it go for it! I did! About 6 months after I was banded and had lost about 50-60 pounds, my DH began having heart problems. He told me one night, now that he had a bad heart I should go find me a healthier guy! I laughed, and said "you put up with me fat all these years and you think a little heart problem is going to scare me off?" He responded with "I never saw you as fat". He looks at a family picture we have on the wall in the den when I was at my biggest, and he freaks out, he says he cannot believe that is me, he never "saw" me that heavy.

Everyday as he hugs me, or I walk by he has complimentary things to say. He had heart surgery a few months ago---and between his healthy heart, and my weight loss---we are giving his ticker a real workout!!!

They are out there, people who see the inside you---and they are so worth waiting for!!! In my DH's case, his Mom and sisters are all overweight, ranging from a few pounds overweight to one as heavy as I was (we were banded together!). I think he never associated fat as being bad---the women he loved were heavy, and they were good women. His exwife on the other hand was about 105 pounds soaking wet---little petite thing----and every ounce of it bi#*h!!!

If you find one who loves you for you---hang on to him!!!

Good Luck!

Kat