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Not 1 person has told me it looks like I've lost weight! I'm sad :(



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While I'm only 6 1/2 weeks out and I've only lost 18 lbs, I've gone from 174 to 156 and down from a 10 to a 6 (in the bottom at least!) and not one person has even noticed. While I'm open about what I've done (everyone knew my lapband had slipped and I was getting it revised to a new surgery), I'm wondering if thats the reason. Like they're expecting me to lose faster and be skinnier faster. Hubby and I play poker 3 nites a week with about 30 other people, some of whom I'm pretty close with and no one has said a word.

Whats the deal? When I had my lapband almost 4 yrs ago, People gasped at 20 lbs (at 250 lbs, 20 lbs is nothing compared to 18 on a 174 lb person, in my opinion). I even wore my size 6 (couldn't believe they fit. Must've been mismarked or something) skinny jeans last nite, was feeling pretty good about myself and no one said anything.

At what point did people start noticing that you're losin weight? Or is it that I see these people 3x a week and they don't notice (like I don't notice seeing myself in the mirror everyday). Hubby is back to calling me "Skinny Minnie" - what he used to call me when my lapband was premium and I lost 104 lbs. He quit calling me that about 18 mths ago when I started gaining the 30 lbs I gained. He says he can tell. How? He sees me everyday?

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People who see you a lot usually don't notice very quickly. Hey, I'm down close to 90 lbs. and only one person has noticed/said anything. It doesn't really bother me because I'm uncomfortable with people focusing much on my looks/body. I also have never mentioned someone's weight loss to them except for very close friends or family. It just seems rude for me to even be looking at their body and making judgments or comparisons.

Also, I do think there are people out there who notice but choose not to say anything for fear of being offensive or overly personal. Like, if they tell you "you look great!" it might be taken as the same thing as saying "you looked horrible before!". Or they might act all happy and excited for you and it turns out you lost weight because you have cancer.

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My husband and I notice the nuances in each other's weight loss a lot. We are each others biggest fan club on the "omg! You've lost so much babe!" Side of things. I mean we see each other naked, he is MORE aware of all my changes than anyone who sees me with my clothes on.

I went to visit clients this week and I wore the same types of clothes as before. Aways black pants, a blouse and a loose, flowing black jacket. Couldn't even have told what I lost where. OTOH with my husband, I'm always showing him the extra space at the waist band of the same pants, and we both love pulling our pants off without even unbuttoning. It never gets old at our house :)

I put my arms around him and notice them going all the way around him now. Our hugs seem closer. He feels my waist and it feels different to both of us. He tells me by boobs are more noticeable now that the tummy is going down. His shirts are loose and I have to wonder how long before his pants fall down and flash us all.

Believe your husband. He sees it up close and in high definition. And with interest and love. It's a good lens to view you through and more observant than strangers typically are.

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Lots of reasons people don't comment, they don't see, they don't care, They are jealous, they like you better fat...(I had a guy tell me this early on... I think you looked better the way you were!) I don't know how long you were at goal with the band, but perhaps you know, the compliments slow down in time, and people just start thinking of you as "normal" and don't comment. Perhaps they didn't even notice you had gained... or just didn't want to go there.Compliments are fun, but you and you husband can see whats going on with your body, and really, thats whats important!

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You're not doing this for other people...you're doing this for you! I couldn't agree more with gamergirl...my wife and I are each others' biggest cheerleaders (no pun intended)!

Keep it going...very inspirational!

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My BFF lost nearly 50# before I could tell. Even now periodically she looks thinner, other times not as much. It's weird.

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I think people are more likely to say it to a guy. Although you seem to like comments, women often don't. I personally get annoyed when people say stuff because I don't know if they know what I did and don't want them to know. Boils down to who cares.

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And not sure why there is a line through all that.

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I had lost nearly 100#s before some people started commenting... give it time.

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For me, the magic number was 47 lbs. I started at 274, and when I lost 47 lbs everyone started to notice. And not right when I lost 47 lbs, but at the end of a 2 week stall when I was stuck at 47 lbs. So obviously my body was still changing even though the scale was not moving. What I'm more fascinated by is the fact that you were able to get the surgery, even though you only weighed 174 lbs!

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Mafar,

At 174 you started quite small.. Perhaps not too you, but trust me to a lot of people that's small.

While a 18 pound loss is great, people probably won't notice much when a small person gets a little smaller.

My advice? Screw em, you did this to get rid of your band, lose the regain and feel good.

And by your first couple of sentences it sounds like that is happening!

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For me, the magic number was 47 lbs. I started at 274, and when I lost 47 lbs everyone started to notice. And not right when I lost 47 lbs, but at the end of a 2 week stall when I was stuck at 47 lbs. So obviously my body was still changing even though the scale was not moving. What I'm more fascinated by is the fact that you were able to get the surgery, even though you only weighed 174 lbs!

I got the surgery at 174 lbs cuz my lapband slipped (started at 248 lbs almost 4 yrs ago) and I knew I'd gain every lb back that I had lost without anything. I probly wouldn't have gotten wls for 44 lbs. There's quite a few of us here that revised to sleeve from band at a lower bmi (mine was 28) but we still needed it.

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Hey stop that I dt care if no body say a word dt gt discouraged. .they r probably uncomfortable mentioning the wait..I no it sounds stupid but its like taboo...proud of u keep on rockin yr cloths

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I got the surgery at 174 lbs cuz my lapband slipped (started at 248 lbs almost 4 yrs ago) and I knew I'd gain every lb back that I had lost without anything. I probly wouldn't have gotten wls for 44 lbs. There's quite a few of us here that revised to sleeve from band at a lower bmi (mine was 28) but we still needed it.

OK, that makes sense. I just didn't realize they would even do the surgery at such a low BMI, even if it is a revision. Thanks for clearing it up.

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I don't expect people to notice I have lost weight because I don't expect other people to pay that much attention to my body.

I work in an office full of women and I know I have heard other women at times say they lost 20 lbs or more and I sure couldn't tell.

Also I am always leary of asking someone if they lost weight and maybe they didn't and might feel bad.

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