To Tell Or Not Tell

[Jazzy1 8]

I'm post op almost three weeks now and I didn't tell a lot of people about my surgery. I haven't gone out much but I know once people see me they will have questions and will definitely have questions once they realize I'm not eating as much as before. By no means am I ashamed about my surgery, I'm just not in the mood to loose friends once I tell them, due to a or any negative comments they might have. Honestly I don't know if there will be negativity but I'm wondering what to expect or should I not say anything. HELP!!!

[Pixie Dust 526]

Hi Jazzy! Love your name! Okay, I haven't been sleeved yet & don't have a date yet BUT I do not intend to tell anyone either. I have told my BFF who lives out of state & of course my husband knows. But the way I'm currently planning on handling it is that I'm having Hernia surgery (that's for my kids...I don't want to scare them because they saw a movie with me about a 693 lb woman who had WLS & died of complications about a month later...so don't want them to know it's WLS.) As for everyone else, I'm just going to say that I'm on a medically supervised diet & just on liquids for about a month as a kick start (hopefully that would cover pre-op & post op liquid diet) & then reintroducing food slowly.

What do you think? Does it sound believable? As far as I'm concerned, it's nobody's business & the first person that should DARE to say "you took the easy way out" if they find out, will feel my knuckles right between their eyes! Amen sistah!

[mikamae80 14]

I told everybody and anybody that asked me---all about my surgery. Mostly I got curiosity seekers that had a lot of questions for me. I have not seen any negativity thus far. I think being open and honest is best because then it shows that you are confident in the decision that you made.

However, some people are not comfortable sharing such a personal experience. That is also totally understandable.

Good luck with whichever route you decide to go.

[JennyBeth 127]

I was sleeved on 3-20 and only told my mom, husband and my boss. Now that I've returned to work I don't mind telling people. I just didn't want to deal with people's negative attitudes before surgery. Afterwards no one's going to say negative comments (at least not to your face) and honestly now that it's done even if someone had negative things to say it doesn't bother me. I know after going through this whole experience that this is the most difficult process I've ever gone through. The hardest part is re-learning how to eat. I dare someone to make a comment to me about this being the "easy way out"! It's a personal choice and I don't blame you for wanting to keep it to yourself. It's not like we went and told everyone before we ate a box of donuts!

[ISleevedIt 379]

Just tell people you are on a high Protein diet. As for eating a little amount of food, tell them that eating a cup to a cup and a half food is all your body needs at a time. My brother told me this since he's been paying to have a nutritionist go to his house to counsel the whole family. The nutritionist had him slowly get to the point where he was eating only a cup of food at a time. He's been able to lose a lot of weight. When I first mentioned that I might do the surgery, he suggested I get a nutritionist to come to the house like he did. I told him I couldn't afford one like that, but can afford WLS since my insurance covers it. It remains to be seen how long or how much discipline he has to maintaining a cup of food at a time. I'm just happy that I have such a great tool (my new tiny tummy) to help me control my portions...and boy does it let me know when I've over done it!

[Jazzy1 8]

Hi Jazzy! Love your name! Okay' date=' I haven't been sleeved yet & don't have a date yet BUT I do not intend to tell anyone either. I have told my BFF who lives out of state & of course my husband knows. But the way I'm currently planning on handling it is that I'm having Hernia surgery (that's for my kids...I don't want to scare them because they saw a movie with me about a 693 lb woman who had WLS & died of complications about a month later...so don't want them to know it's WLS.) As for everyone else, I'm just going to say that I'm on a medically supervised diet & just on liquids for about a month as a kick start (hopefully that would cover pre-op & post op liquid diet) & then reintroducing food slowly.

What do you think? Does it sound believable? As far as I'm concerned, it's nobody's business & the first person that should DARE to say "you took the easy way out" if they find out, will feel my knuckles right between their eyes! Amen sistah! [/quote']

Hi Pixie Dust. I love your name as well. OMG!!!! We share a similar story as I will and have told some people that I've had hernia surgery. I've told my BFF who also lives in another state, my husband, my mom, and 3 other people my true story as the are the ones who won't judge me. So YES your story is and will be believable and you're right, it's nobody's business. I'm going to see how things go because I've been pretty much hidden and haven't gone back to work yet so I'm preparing myself for the 21 questions and negative responses. I met a fellow sleever today who shared a couple of stories and it just made me mad how insensitive some people can be so the knuckles between the eye is sounding pretty good right about now. LOL.

We'll thanks for responding and keep in touch as I'd love to hear your journey. Also when you get your date, be prepared because it'll be here before you know it and I wish for you to have a wonder experience like I did. Good luck and well wishes to you.

[Jazzy1 8]

THANKS everybody for your responses as I appreciate them all. I guess I'll have to learn how to deal with the situation if or when it happens. Until then, I'll continue to enjoy this new me. Best wishes to you all.

[sumslim2b 4]

I've been tying with sharing vs not haring. Was going to go wth hernia Tory as well. Just approved by insurance... Next up consult with doc and schedule dates. I'm both excited and

nervous as well. Thx for sharing

[Pixie Dust 526]

Hi Pixie Dust. I love your name as well. OMG!!!! We share a similar story as I will and have told some people that I've had hernia surgery. I've told my BFF who also lives in another state, my husband, my mom, and 3 other people my true story as the are the ones who won't judge me. So YES your story is and will be believable and you're right, it's nobody's business. I'm going to see how things go because I've been pretty much hidden and haven't gone back to work yet so I'm preparing myself for the 21 questions and negative responses. I met a fellow sleever today who shared a couple of stories and it just made me mad how insensitive some people can be so the knuckles between the eye is sounding pretty good right about now. LOL.

We'll thanks for responding and keep in touch as I'd love to hear your journey. Also when you get your date, be prepared because it'll be here before you know it and I wish for you to have a wonder experience like I did. Good luck and well wishes to you.

Well, I guess I lied a little bit since everyone on this site knows I'm having WLS! LOL! I told my next door neighbor today too. Didn't really want too but they don't really talk to the other neighbors & since we have no family here, I need someone to keep an eye on my kids if my husband has to run to me for some reason. Hopefully not & my kids will be off for the summer but being I have an autistic child, I like to keep all bases covered, in case we need help. I've never left either of my kids with a sitter. My oldest is now 17 so he can stay by himself but I wouldn't leave my 11 y/o with my 17 y/o. My oldest has only lived with my youngest all his life **insert roll eyes here** but he still doesn't know how to deal with autism. So I can't leave them together. After I mentioned it to my neighbor, she said to me "don't worry, I won't let your boys starve" meaning my husband too. Whew...that took a load off my mind!

Anyway, for the time being, I'm going to stick to the Hernia story for whoever else may get suspicious & then take it from there. Sounds like you've pretty much figured it out Jazzy1! Don't tell me your BFF lives in Atlanta too?! Wouldn't that be funny?!

From your mouth to God's ears that I have a wonderful experience like you! I'm so nervous of complications. I don't want to be a burden to my family as we deal with enough here. I plan to follow directions to a "T" & hopefully all will go well & simple. No infections, no pain, no nothing but positivity!

Tomorrow afternoon I have a 3 hour meeting with the Bariatric Program Director who will go over everything with me. I hope I think of questions as I'm there & not after I've gotten home! I also pray she doesn't weigh me tomorrow as I didn't do too well over Easter!

Please pray for me!

[Jazzy1 8]

Well' date=' I guess I lied a little bit since everyone on this site knows I'm having WLS! LOL! I told my next door neighbor today too. Didn't really want too but they don't really talk to the other neighbors & since we have no family here, I need someone to keep an eye on my kids if my husband has to run to me for some reason. Hopefully not & my kids will be off for the summer but being I have an autistic child, I like to keep all bases covered, in case we need help. I've never left either of my kids with a sitter. My oldest is now 17 so he can stay by himself but I wouldn't leave my 11 y/o with my 17 y/o. My oldest has only lived with my youngest all his life **insert roll eyes here** but he still doesn't know how to deal with autism. So I can't leave them together. After I mentioned it to my neighbor, she said to me "don't worry, I won't let your boys starve" meaning my husband too. Whew...that took a load off my mind!

Anyway, for the time being, I'm going to stick to the Hernia story for whoever else may get suspicious & then take it from there. Sounds like you've pretty much figured it out Jazzy1! Don't tell me your BFF lives in Atlanta too?! Wouldn't that be funny?!

From your mouth to God's ears that I have a wonderful experience like you! I'm so nervous of complications. I don't want to be a burden to my family as we deal with enough here. I plan to follow directions to a "T" & hopefully all will go well & simple. No infections, no pain, no nothing but positivity!

Tomorrow afternoon I have a 3 hour meeting with the Bariatric Program Director who will go over everything with me. I hope I think of questions as I'm there & not after I've gotten home! I also pray she doesn't weigh me tomorrow as I didn't do too well over Easter!

Please pray for me! [/quote']

Hi and first let me say, your surgery will be successful with no complications and no pain or very minimal pain. I don't remember much my 1st day after surgery because the pain meds had me drowsy so I pretty much slept that day away. Day 2 and everyday thereafter up to this point has been fine. No pain meds since I left the hospital and my only complaint is that I can't tolerate the Protein Shakes anymore. They make me nauseous. My thoughts before and after we're always positive. I'm 3 weeks post op today. YEAH!!!! And everything seems like a blur and I'm healing up quite well. Still no pain and very little soreness. I went shopping a week after surgery just to get out the house and have been venturing out further and further every week since. I said all that to say again, you will be absolutely fine.

Thank God for great neighbors who are willing to help out. You're boys will be fine.

As for my BFF, yes she lives in Atlanta (Alpharetta, GA). HILARIOUS. What are the odds of that happening? Lol.

Well I will definitely say a prayer for you and let me know when you get your date. Have a good one and write your questions down for your doctor. Take care.

[Jazzy1 8]

I've been tying with sharing vs not haring. Was going to go wth hernia Tory as well. Just approved by insurance... Next up consult with doc and schedule dates. I'm both excited and

nervous as well. Thx for sharing

Hi. I guess we have to deal with situations when or if they arise. Hopefully they won't. Congratulations on your approval and may your surgery be successful. Let me know when your date is so I can give my support and if you have any questions, feel free to ask. Have a good one.

[Itsme! 98]

I had told my hubby, and two work friends/pseudo-mothers. Last week I told one of my sisters. Yesterday I finally told my boss and she was supportive just like I knew she'd be. I'm debating telling my other siblings. Maybe just before surgery. Other than that people will find out eventually. I no longer feel the need to keep it super secret.