Other mommies...

[wonder_mommy 6]

Ok other mommies!! I need some help!! I am beyond excited and can't wait to get sleeved on the 8th of April. BUT every couple of days I have a wash of guilt come over me about the what ifs...what if something goes wrong...etc...

Staying fat for me is a much worse case right now since I already have Type II diabetes and high cholesterol. But how did you move past those feeling and stay the course???

Thanks!!!

[an88dreamer 2]

I'm a mommy of two beautiful boys. 2 year old and a 5 month old. They along with my wonderful husband are my life and I keep thinking how wonderful it's going to be for them to know they will have a healthier, stronger mom and wife to enjoy for a long time. That takes my guilt away in a sec.

[Mystie 146]

I made a video for my baby girl and saved it on my computer desktop before I went for my surgery. Couldn't get through it without bawling.

[Kristina J. 581]

I am also making a video after reading through complication stories :-/

I know the reality of my situation at 130lbs overweight with heart problems (among others) so I know that this what I need to do, but I am not blind to the risk. I worry so much about not coming home. I worry about what that would mean for them. But I worry about my heart giving out if I don't do this, so I have decided to move forward. There is a certain kind of pain with this decision with small kids at home. Mine are going to be 2 and 3 and a half in May.

Like I said, I am making them a video. I have attempted twice so far and have not made it through. I do not want to leave a video full of tears. If that is what I leave them, I do not want it to be sad. I am also leaving letters for when they get older. Hopefully I will be super prepared for absolutely nothing! But I will feel better knowing that everything is in order just in case.

Oh, and I read in a thread from a mother who had survived horrible complications that suggested leaving a note... She reminded Mom's to never put in the letters that you did this to get healthy for them!! They don't need to live with that! I thought that was an excellent point!!

[wonder_mommy 6]

WOW!! Never in a million years did I think of the stuff you guys mentioned about letters and videos!!! I was just looking to work through my anxiety and these post have me even more anxious!!!

[wonder_mommy 6]

I'm a mommy of two beautiful boys. 2 year old and a 5 month old. They along with my wonderful husband are my life and I keep thinking how wonderful it's going to be for them to know they will have a healthier' date=' stronger mom and wife to enjoy for a long time. That takes my guilt away in a sec.[/quote']

What you have said though is exactly what I did need to hear to call some fears!!

[Kristina J. 581]

I'm so sorry if my post made you more anxious, that really wasn't my intent at all! I am very anxious too. But some of the people that we post with here have come very close to death. It's something that we need to consider as we make this decision, especially as parents. It's not all weight loss and life change. It is life risking surgery.

But as parents I definitely agree that we have a responsibility to do what it takes to be the best and healthiest moms we can be and I know for me, this will definitely make me a better parent. I felt the same icky feeling when I was making out my will and deciding who would raise my children if my husband and I died. I am an anxious person by nature! But I'm also an organizer. It makes me feel more in control in case something happens. So please don't let my post freak you out more. lol We take risks everyday. We run a risk of getting hurt every time we get in a car to go make money so we can buy our children food!! But we do it because we need to be good mom and feed our kids!! this is a bigger extension of that idea... We are taking a risk to be a good/healthy mom!

I'm so sorry if I freaked you out more, especially since I'm going through it myself! Lol so didn't mean to do that!! Just keep breathing... Before we know it, we'll be recovering and struggling to chase all these kids around on a liquid diet!

[Mystie 146]

Well the video never needed to be seen. Everything went fine! And if you're in a good hospital, there's nothing that can go wrong that they won't be able to handle.

Have faith. You'll be at home eating yummy yummy chicken broth in no time.

[neener 8]

I had the same worries. I was sleeved on February 5 and it went so amazingly well that the nurse thought I was a visitor on the second day. I was up dressed and walking around. Don't read the complication stories too much on the threads, they will just worry you more. For me, my little boy is 2 and I was already staying home from things because I was worried about my size. My kid missed out on hay rides, horse rides, sports things, all because I was worried about myself. So that was my motivator. I WILL take my kid to Disney and fit with him on the ride. He won't miss out because of me. And only 5 weeks out I'm already chasing him all over the house and way more able to keep up. Find a goal (like going up Disney) and focus on that when you get nervous. This has been the best decision of my life! No regrets at all!

[rmubvashrink 57]

I had the same fears just remember you are doing this for them! Keep away from too many horro stories your journey is your own and you will feel much worst worrying about the what ifs? How about what if you don't? Continue to shop in the miserable fat section and consuming more food then you may need. It is true it my seem like a selfish act but it's actually selfless because it's for you and the over all good of your family! You got this . You will be in great hands I'm sure.

[SleeveMommy 2]

I have a 4 yr old daughter and I'm already her 2nd mommy (international adoption). It brings me too tears when I think what she would go through if she lost yet another parent. ... but to be fair to her and honor her birth mother and her I feel she deserves a mom that is healthy and can play and run with her. A mom that will live to see her grow up into the beautiful woman she will become. That helps me with my fear of the what ifs... best wishes, hang in there. Probably meeting my surgeon next week to schedule.

[hunny79 72]

Wow Ive thought about it because as mother you think about the " what ifs" but mannnnn this thread makes you REALLY think about it but to make a video really puts the risks in your face,so to speak omg im crying just thinking about it ... not sleeved yet hoping for end of summer wow!!!

[abranewme 98]

My sons 2nd birthday is in July and I made sure to have the surgery after that date. I want to do a video but have not mustered up what to say or how to say it. I had a full blown anxiety meltdown crying fest last week thinking the same things you all have posted here. I also have a mother with Alzheimer's who needs my care. I've come to the conclusion that I need to be my best self for them and my husband. I also don't want to take the Pollyanna approach because complications are A REAL THING. However prayer and MY BELIEF IN GOD helped me make the decision to do the surgery. This is kinda off topic but the death if James Gandolfini REALLY HIT ME HARD that my reality could be his if I don't get my act together. He passed away leaving a brand new baby and wife. So young. Only 50.

[abranewme 98]

QUESTION: how well will we (post surgery) be able to move, pick up, hold, hug our toddlers? My DH is taking the week off but my sweet pea loves his mommy anyone?!

[Kristina J. 581]

I was told 6 weeks, but when I said I just didn't think I would be able to find help that long, I was told 4 weeks but to lift carefully with my knees. But by 3 weeks all my help was gone and I was lifting both kids. But I was perfectly fine and had no issues. I was very careful and kept it at a minimum but did what I had to do. I would ask your doc about it to be safe!!